the absence of light

It’s dark. There’s nothing here, but the space seems so full, full of something with no entity, at least no physical entity. The world seems like its spinning, is it? I can’t tell, there are no objects to check, maybe its not spinning. It feels like I’m being pushed and pulled in every direction, causing me to stand still. Am I standing? Am I really here? I can’t see my self, I can’t feel myself. I can’t even close my eyes, but what does that matter if its darkness either way? Silence, no that’s not right. Silence implies an absence of sound. Sound is here, it’s everywhere, but it’s hidden, only an illusion. No fear, no confusion. I feel fine, better then fine, my head is cleared. I can understand everything perfectly, everything makes sense, but nothing matters.

         White light fills the emptiness, consuming everything, the darkness, the hidden sound, and the unseen entities. I can’t look away, can’t close my eyes. I can see myself; at least I think it’s me. It’s hard to tell, its strange looking at yourself from someone else’s perspective. I can’t actually see my face, or my clothes, or my body. It’s just a feeling, it is me, but it’s different. It feels like it was me, or it will be. But it’s just not completely me, its something darker. It’s being consumed along with the dark, its apart of the dark.

         The centre of the light, if it has a centre, fades slightly. Colours appear, every single colour of the spectrum, all of them soft and weak compared to the light. They grow, breaking free of the light, until they are vibrant and strong. They move about, twisting, distorting, melding, and breaking apart, forming a shape. A woman.

         She’s standing in the light, immersed in it, covering her body from neck to foot. She’s beautiful, in all the sense of the word. Her face is turned up, eyes closed. Arms outstretch pushing back the darkness with little effort. Her arms start to tremble, her whole body shakes. She’s crying. It’s strange. It’s all strange, but this is bizarre. Her tears are dark. There is no physical shape; they look as if they are shadows running down her face.

         Her arms drop to her sides, her head falls forwards. Eyes closed. She’s no longer shaking. She falls, and disappears.

         The light slowly fades and the darkness creeps back into existence. But it’s different now. There’s nothing in the dark, no entities, and no hidden sounds.

         

Nothing.



      ~~~



another dream, exactly like last years. well not exactly.

last years dream occurred on October 10th. the dates now... what the hell is the date. last time i checked it was about September something or other.  good job Rick, maybe I should get into the habit of remembering the date, or read the news paper, either one works.

I cant even remember last years dream. it was similar, I can remember some of it: the darkness, the spinning, but that's all.

      I propped my self up on my elbows and looked over at my watch. 8:00 am. that's when i noticed the beads of sweat all over my body. that's strange. i wasn't feeling hot, i wasn't even feeling scared or exilerated from the dream. so why the sweat. oh well. there are more important things to take care of right now. like only having half an hour to get ready for work.

      have a shower, eat some breakfast, get dressed, change the tie because it has a stain. well that doesnt match the suit... oh well. 10 minutes left. the bus has probably left by now, ill have to get a taxi. that means money. $20 left... i'll have to walk the rest of the way. looks like no Starbucks coffee for me this morning, ill be surprised if I have a few coins left. 

    just then the phone started ringing. should i pick it up? it may be important. maybe a call from work telling me i dont have to come in this morning. i highly doubt it though, the only way you get to have a day off is if your giving birth or if your fired. i hope im not getting fired because it would be a shock to me if i was giving birth. the phone was still ringing on the kitchen wall. well at least there persistent. i grabbed the phone off its holster.

"hello."

ive never been good with phone calls. sending or receiving. its just missing a vital part of conversation. well at least i think so. but what do i know about conversation?

"hi Rick its Sheryl. listen do you have moment?"

'No i dont really have a moment at all!'  thats what i was thinking. but i wouldnt say that, at least not over the phone. that would be rude.

"yeah whats wrong?"

"Well i just wanted to talk, about you and me."

'a talk about me and her' that cannot be good. well we have been dating for about four months now, i guess it was time for a talk, either that or shes breaking up with me - 5 minutes left now - what ever she does she better do it quickly.

i didnt say anything, she wanted to talk so im deciding to listen. i guesse she was expecting me to say something.

"hello? Rick are you there?"

"yeah im stil here - better get straight to the point if i want to keep my job - so what exactly did you want to talk about"

"well you know how long weve been seeign each other now."

"uhuh"

"do you remember how long?"

i didnt even have to think. "3 months and 7 days." i cant beleive i can just rememebr that off the tope of my head, yet i cant even remember the date.





to be continued...