Turn off your TV

Every parent knows his or her child is exceptional. We dream for them with every step they take. Each milestone is a sign of the bright and beautiful future you have worked so hard to offer. But what if you found a passion of theirs early on. One that they willingly focused on and seemingly gained knowledge from. You would, no doubt, gleefully allow them to explore it. Well, at eighteen months of age Nicholas was in love with PBS. Anything from Arthur to Reading Rainbow… And, of course, there was also “The Wiggles,” a Disney channel show that inspired Nicholas to dance and sing. Such good-natured programming brought him such joy and simultaneously began building a strong vocabulary. He was flourishing… or so I thought. There was yet another advantage to his intrigue… I had time. I had time for chores, time to rest, and time for myself. These were the things every mother dreams of. I had so many compliments about Nicky’s disposition and his intelligence I was certain I was doing something right.

At the same time I always felt a bit distance. It was more like a “job” to be the care taker all day long and still maintain all the housework and shopping. Slowly I began getting bored each day and found myself wondering why Nicky and I were so comfortable not interacting with one another. Everyone said he was just independent and I should be proud of what a secure child I had raised. So the hours in front of the T.V. grew slowly. And around July, it had progressed to average of seven hours daily and would be the first thing he would ask for each morning. As long as he was happy I thought it was okay. Then we threw him for a loop.

His grandparents invited us on a beach vacation. There were eight of us in a beautiful three-bedroom condo over looking the ocean. Nicholas was overwhelmed with joy. He embraced everything he encountered. He played in the ocean, swam in the swimming pool, dug in the sand, and walked through an aquarium. He was thrown into the world and loved every minute of it. That week was a turning point in Nicholas’ life that would not soon be forgotten.

Like the flip of a coin, Nicholas became very aggressive upon our return home. He began having severe temper tantrums and constantly wanting to be held. There was a very short list of things that seemed to calm him. Being picked up was the best route in terms of silencing the screams but close behind was T.V. and the ever-popular cookie. Still, what was once a happy baby who never gave me a hard time had become this miserable child. My patience was running of fumes and I was running out of ideas.

After two week of non-stop crying and screaming I thought for certain he must be ill though no other symptoms were present. After the doctor diagnosed Nicky as having a sore throat I quickly catered to his every need. Every request and even every demand was met with as much of a smile as I could muster and still he was miserable. Finally I called grandma. I broke into tears and confessed that I could not handle the “terrible twos” if this was the beginning. I wanted to trade lives with her and pay her to take it on for me.

She regretfully declined but offered a weekend instead. I could have an opportunity to recuperate and we could lay out a plan on how we could approach his change in personality. After many hours of discussion and research on the computer something began to stand out. A significant number of fingers began to point to the T.V. Many websites claimed that under the age of three years no child should be watching T.V. at all let alone seven hours. It was time to take action.

This was going to be tough for me. I had gotten used to those shows keeping him still long enough for me to do laundry and make dinner. How would I get those things done without it I wondered? Well, easy or difficult, something had to give because this was not the beautiful and brilliant little boy I knew two weeks ago. Monday morning the announcement would be made… the T.V. was now broken.

The first day was challenging but remarkable. I found myself having a difficult time presenting exciting activities to keep his attention but Nicholas seemed up for anything. We went to parks and read a lot. We listened to music and played imagination games where we ran around the room pretending to be choo-choo trains. He still had a few outbursts but nothing like the week before. He was responding to me and I was putting all other things aside. It was a good day.

Day two was incredible. We played and sang and danced like we were rejoicing life. I found myself truly enjoying just being his mother and not even thinking about the things I “should” have been doing around the house. He was my happy baby again. But still there was more excitement to come. We began to try new things and listen to each other. I taught him how to make a pizza and he showed me that he could get in and out of his car seat all by himself. We began eating together and he began to try new foods. I showed him how to make paper plate masks and he began using full sentences. There was so much about each other we didn’t know and it seemed as though now we were really connecting.

Day three was much the same. Arts and crafts, exercise and music motivated us throughout the day. I couldn’t believe the transition that was taking place. He was more focused and motivated. He was polite and patient. He was even more wonderful than before… if that was possible. He was eating better, sleeping better, and maintaining a pleasant and loving disposition. Could it really be this simple I thought?

It has been a week now and Nicholas is trying new things daily. He had his first experience with play-doh today… what an adventure that was. The reason I wrote this was to let parents out there know that though the programs are educational, though the characters are sweet, and maybe you’ve seen your child pick up a new song or word from them they are no replacement for you. Children need to experience the world around them not just watch someone else’s version of it on a T.V. The world won’t stop turning if we forget to sweep the floor… but it just might if we forget to give the world to our children. Turn off your T.V. and rejoice life with your babies.