The Grinders, Part V

"The Grinders, Part IV" 

"Wake up!"

"Gah! Wha--Where am I?"

My dentist's head poked out of the shadows of my room and said, "I am sorry to inform you that I have reason to believe that I did not remove all of the bottom molar. Your mother asked me to come here and treat you."

As the dentist pushed his hands into rubber gloves, he said, "Now, let us begin. Open. Good. Nice and wide. You will feel a little sting. There, that was not so bad. Was it? Have you ever fallen off a bicycle and gotten your face caught in the wheels? No? You are about to find out how that feels."

There was a yank deep within my gum. The cords in the dentist's neck pressed outward and made ridges. His face turned sanguine. In an instant, his hands relaxed and the face paled.

"Damn! I can't get this stupid thing! Oh pardon my language. I beseech you, do not tell a soul that I said that. Aha. This should do it."

The dentist knelt, and he produced a rock hammer and an archaeologist's pick.

"Stay still. This will not hurt. No, stop moving your head. Don't you want me to help you? C'mon, open your mouth. That's it, stay right where you are. Good."

Gently, the dentist positioned the pick on a sore part in my mouth, and gave a light tap with the hammer. Nothing happened. He banged harder and harder. He swung the hammer frantically. Half the time, he missed the pick, but "he" simply swung even harder. The hammer smashed into my jaw, but I felt nothing. I fell to the floor.

"Why, why, why can't I exhume it? Why!"

The dentist ripped at his hair.

A crow bar crashed into my chair, an inch away from my face. I leapt up and tried to run. "Bang!" The bar shoved itself into my lower jaw like a worker's tool in concrete.

"I did it! I did it! I made a dent! A dent! Can you believe it? A dent."

By this time, the dentist was dancing.

"See. See. The bar stays in your mouth. In my dent! Yee-hee! Come, look at a mirror! Come! Well, maybe not. I made a dent. Yessiree, a dent." The dentist pressed his foot against the crow bar. A dark spot of sweat covered his collar. The spot enlarged and his face turned purple. I felt something rising within my mouth, but an immeasurably small distance.

"I can't believe it," the dentist said while wiping his glistening face, "I can't believe it. How can anything be so deeply embedded in a mouth? Wait a minute! I know what to do!"

The dentist slid the crow bar out. He disappeared behind my bed and an axe shot up from his spot. The axe jerked to a stop and almost fell.

"Don't worry. I won't hit you with an axe."

"Bang!" "Bong!" Swing. "Crash!"

"How do you like my invention?"

The dentist showed me the head of the crowbar. The rest of the tool was gone. "He" lodged the bar's head in the dent. Then he removed other crowbar heads and forced them into various places around a site in my mouth. Soon the room was filled with laborers heaving at ropes tied to the heads. One man collapsed, writhing as he pressed his hand to his side. The rest of the ropes eased momentarily.

"Come on gentlemen, do not let the injured man deter you. Even though I am a doctor of dentistry, I have basic training in other branches of medicine. I shall attend to him. Remember, the object in the jaw is your grail."

When the men resumed, something gave way in the bottom of my jaw. Air rushed into a pit in my mouth.

"It was me! I unearthed it."

"Well done," said the dentist as he gave someone a silver coin.

"You didn't do it, you liar. I did."

"All right," said the dentist, "you can have some change too."

The room erupted in chaos, and every worker pinched and grabbed at the doctor. He raised his axe, and there was silence.

"I do not care which of you were the first to unearth the cover. I want you to finish your work."

Tediously, the men dragged something out of my mouth. For several minutes, the dentist stood on my bed, with his arms stretched to the ceiling. He then fixed his eyes on my mouth, almost as if he were mesmerized.

He walked out of the room, and returned with my mother. The dentist pointed to my mouth, and my mother pinned a black inverted triangle to my chest.

"The Grinders, Part VI"