This is a first draft of a noval. About loss, moving on and first love. |
Preface Why did this always happen to me? I never knew for sure but it seemed that I have always had perpetual bad luck. From when I was a young girl to now and it just seems to increase all the time. It might explain why this is happening to me now. I’ve concluded that it was because the all the usual bad things – losing my favourite pair of earrings, or tripping in front of some cute guys at the mall – had ceased in preparation for this catastrophe. Here I was hoping my last year in high school would be memorable for other reasons never thinking it would be for something like this. Chapter 1 Excitement did not even begin to describe the intense emotions emanating from me at this moment. I was in my last year of high school; hopefully next fall I would be out on my own at university, the idea was practically euphoric. As I got off the bus and made my up to the school. It was the same small town high school my parents and my grandparents graduated from. I hoped beyond all hope that my future children would never have to suffer through the boredom of small town life as I have. The only thing that made it bearable was my best friend. Erica was sitting on a small bench waiting for me. We looked so similar that if this weren’t a small town and everyone had not known she moved here in the sixth grade you swear we could be twins. We had the same brown hair with just a hint of red, I was slightly taller - which I never let her forget – we also had the same round face. About the only difference was that she had these deep hazel eyes - that could drag anything out of you – and I had icy blue-grey eyes. We had always joked that we were separated at birth. She stood as I made my way over. “So excited or what? I mean we are finally grads!” her caring face lit up. “I never would have believed it if I hadn’t pinched myself like ten times this morning to make sure I wasn’t dreaming.” I joked as we made our way into the school. Our schedules were not completely the same but three of our five classes were together; that was only because she was taking advanced art and chemistry – the latter at the request of her parents – while I took theatre arts and writing. We were always more artistic but her parents thought chemistry would look better on a collage application. We made our way to English. This was going to be a long year I could tell because we had Ms. Gibberson. She was a crazy old bat that should have retired years ago but no one had the heart to kick her out. Technically she this was her last year and just my luck I would get stuck with her. After an hour of Ms. Gibberson rambling on the importance of Shakespeare and how under appreciated he was by the youth of today, the bell rang. “That class is going to be the death of me. I mean Gibberson? Could it get any worse?” Erica grumbled as we made our way to trig. “I know what you mean I was hoping to avoid her but just my luck I would get stuck with her in her last year teaching too. She is going to go crazy do you realize that?” I moaned in agreement. “At least you have Mr. McCreedy for your writing class.” I was happy to hear that. We entered the class and took a couple of empty desks in the middle rows near the back. Mr. Gardner came in just as the second bell rang. Another painstakingly long hour passed. At the end of second period Erica made her way to chemistry while I headed to Theatre Arts. Our drama teacher was a bit eccentric and during the musical season was known to use his Theatre Arts classes to help with sets but that was fine with me. Mr. Laferty was already in the auditorium when I got there with a couple others I recognized. There were of course the committed drama kids, some slackers who just wanted an easy grade and then there was Sarah and Michelle. I had known them since we were little. We had always been friends growing up in the same neighbourhood. They were like Erica and I were, inseparable. I went and sat with them and was surprised when an hour later bell rang for lunch. “So I heard that you had a pretty busy summer avoiding Andrew.” Sarah fished as we made our way to the cafeteria. “You would too if he was hounding you twenty-four seven.” I retorted. “I don’t know why you didn’t just say yes…” Michelle started. “Because she has better taste than that.” I turned to see Erica coming up behind us. Michelle and Sarah made a face and turned back to me. “Well we’ll see you later Kerryn.” Michelle said and she and Sarah went to sit with their other friends. “I really can’t understand what you ever did to piss them off so thoroughly.” I laughed as I watched them walk away. “Be born I guess.” She laughed too. “Grub?” “Yes, I’m starving.” We got our food and headed to a table where a couple of our other friends were. Jackson noticed as we made our way over and patted the seat next to him as I got closer. “So how was your summer? It had to be better than mine. I mean I like working on cars as much as any guy but spending the summer with my dad looking over my shoulder practically killed me!” “Oh come on Jackson it couldn’t have been that bad. I mean your dad is a pretty cool guy.” I laughed. “Yeah, well you haven’t been around much while he tries to convert me back to the land of heterosexuals.” He joked. It had never really surprised me when at the end of grade eleven Jackson had come clean with me. I immediately told him I was ok with it and went on like nothing had ever changed because in my mind things hadn’t. Jackson’s dad didn’t take the news quite as well. “He’ll come around I’m sure.” Erica added from across the table. “Just give him some time. He’s still adjusting.” “So what did you say to piss off the tweedle dee and tweedle dumb?” He joked changing the subject. “Oh the usual, how I was going to fry up some babies after school.” Erica’s sarcasm getting the better of her. “Actually she told them that I kept turning Andrew down this summer because I had better taste than that.” I shot Erica a look. “I don’t understand why you did I mean he is a good looking guy.” “Oh reel in the tongue there he doesn’t swim in your pool.” Erica teased. “Well he followed me around like a lost puppy and it was getting on my nerves.” I added before they got into one of their one-liner fights. “Well regardless Sarah is kinda in a snit about it because you know she has liked Andrew since fourth grade.” “Yeah she seemed nice enough in theatre arts anyway.” “Well that was her fake friend face.” Erica chirped in. “I would ignore her altogether before she gets ugly.” “Can we go back to the days when boys were stupid and we didn’t care about them?” I sighed. “No offence Jackson.” “None taken…” he was just about to start into something else when the bell went off. Lunch my safe period had ended now it was off to French. I was not looking forward to this but I knew it was better to have it. So, unwillingly Erica and I got up. “See you later Jackson we’re off to French.” “Good luck with that I’ll stick with Spanish.” I waved as we headed out of the cafeteria. We walked in silence for a minute before I spoke. “So you want to do something after school? We could go down to Jackie’s.” I offered suggesting the little coffee shop we always hung out at while she sketched and I wrote. “I have to baby-sit the demon child but you can come over if you want.” Erica’s little brother wasn’t all that bad as long as he had something to do. “Yeah, sure, why not.” I agreed, “I need to get out of the house for awhile my mom is on one of her cleaning sprees and I do not want to get roped into that.” We entered the class and found some seats just as the bell rang. Mrs. Robichaud got up from her desk and immediately went into lecturing. I tuned her out just wishing for it to be done already. I would have run out of the room as soon as the bell rang but I waited for Erica and told her I would meet her in the parking lot after school. I made my way to the class that was easily going to be my favourite. Not only was it writing but it was with Mr. McCreedy. He was the best English teacher I had ever had. He did not disappoint. By the end of the day I had no homework but I was excited to get to work on my short story piece that we would be working on in the first part of my writing class. I was trying to decide whether to use an existing piece or start a new one on my way down to the parking lot. When I got there Erica wasn’t there yet so I took my cell phone out of my bag and dialled my house number. I let it ring four times till the answering machine kicked in. I thought it was weird that no ones was home but nothing more as I left my message saying I would be over at Erica’s. It was around eight when I finally got home from Erica’s. As usually her mom insisted I stay for dinner and with the promise of meatloaf I couldn’t refuse. I unlocked the door and walked into the living room. The T.V was on but no one was in the room. I went to the kitchen to get a drink. My mom was sitting on a stool by the island. “Mom…is everything okay?” her expression answered my question before it was even asked. “It’s your father,” the tears welled up in her eyes. “What happened to Dad?” “H…he’s gone,” her voice broke. “The doctors said it was a brain aneurism. There was nothing that they do.” I sank to the floor and rested against the island. The words whirled around in my head. Then the memories pushed the words aside. All the birthdays and Christmases, secret trips to the ice cream place around the corner. Silent tears betrayed my composed face. I could hear my mom sobbing somewhere above me. What were we going to do now? Dad had always been our rock; the one who held us together when things got rough. I stood up and hugged my mom tight. I would have to be the strong one now, at least in front of Mom. “We’ll make it through. We still have each other.” I barely whispered in her ear trying to keep my voice from cracking. |