Painting on Canvas

Painting on Canvas

My life is full of sadness
And my only weapon is my paintbrush and canvas
But I know something is missing
And I don’t know what it is

As I look at the mirror,
I can see too many happy peoples
In my memories I can see it clearly
But why can’t I join them?

I want to give up,
And throw away all my canvas,
Because I cant see the real
And what is missing

Am I going to live my whole life this kind of way?
As I walk through my rooms,
My eyes are already dimming
And I can’t see my vision

As I open my window,
I saw a beautiful thing
And it seems my conscience wants to tell me,
That I should paint it

I get my paintbrush and my canvas then I started to paint
Even If my eyes are close
My hands started to stroke of an image that I cannot clearly see
A beautiful image of somebody
Then I ask my self, can I call this mine?

And In the next morning when I woke up
I can still feel that my checks are red and something happened
So I look at the portrait that I have painted last night
And my canvas is all clear
Am I dreaming?

Then I hesitated that I know that I have painted something
My sick body told me that I am tired enough
And I need to rest because it was only a vision of yesterday
A vision that never ends
And I need a long rest that needs not to be disturbed
Disturbed by the happy visions of my past