Broken Toy

And my already
aching heart
winces
again as you come back
for one more cheap shot at my love.
I anger
in that moment
when I know that tomorrow you will be gone.
The fury is aimed only at myself.
For again I am opening my arms
to you when I can already forsee the pain that it will bring.

Still. As the tears glisten
in your eyes
they roll forth from mine and I can do nothing
to fight the urge
to run to you
So I fly foreward,
bounding
towards your comfort.
If only to hold you.
In one moment of ecstacy I wrap my whole self,
heart,
body,
mind,
soul,
around you.
Embracing you fully as ever.
As if these scars
on my wrist
and my shattered soul are not of your doing.
My head is filled with the heat and pleasure
of your touch,
your passion,
your love.

And in the next moment I am sprawled out.
Pieces of my heart floating around me.
My mind foggy, muchy too fogy.
but the fog does not lessen the sting.
Which permeates me entirely.
I am left
here
alone
to ponder and eventually confirm the fact, my love can never win.
I am not but a broken toy.