Princess Mehlilcha Meets Mister Kidd

Princess Mehlilcha was occupied with her usual Thursday afternoon task of deciding what to do with her herself. The older children of the castle were out riding or flying the falcons, and while Mehlilcha could ride it was only on the fat pony and jumping was out of the question. The Princess could summon the younger children but the ones closer to her age of six years had grown shy of the royal presence while the yet younger ones were rather like babies. All of the dolls had been played with. A chambermaid was always available for a game of Swix but Mehlilcha had had enough Swix today. One’s fortune can be told only so many times. There was sketching but Mehlilcha’s sketches seldom came out well. It seemed too hot to go into the yard and the garden had been visited many times before, and her studies would not begin until next year. Princess Mehlilcha wished that she had a sister or brother, little or big. King and Queen Kriyon wished the same. The more royal children the better to play the game of royal marriage in the network of alliances, but in spite of the best efforts of His and Her Majesties more playing pieces were not forthcoming.

Mehlilcha had attached a little bow of paper to a string and was indulging Kreen in the love all cats have for dangling objects when she looked up to notice a boy of about five years of age standing in front of the balcony. Had he come in without knocking? Mehlilcha forgot her manners and asked, “Who are you?”
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Mister Kidd found himself in a room. There was the fanciest embroidered cloth everywhere. The canopied bed had curtains so thick that it looked like a little house, from the ceiling hung a hemisphere of golden cloth, and the carpet had been sewn to appear as real grass growing from the ground. The walls were covered with tapestries of green of rolling hills with horses in all manner of poses, feeding, running, and fighting; of mountains with streams and fishermen and cabins; and most of one wall was of a busy port with sailing ships being loaded and unloaded by gangs of men and women with a volcano island off in the distance. There were weavings and brocades and macramé but no tables or chairs, only many pillows of all colors and sizes, and tassels hung all about from braids of all sizes, some as big as hawsers. In the center of all this and playing with a tiger striped kitten was a girl in a bright red party dress with bare feet. From her head grew blond hair with the slight tints of red and black that form the shade known as golden, with waves and big curls and in the midst of all that a small tiara with a few tiny sparkling stones. Though Mister Kidd was only four years old his father Sampson and mother Molly read to him at night before bed and Mister knew from the pictures that this was a princess. The princess looked at him and said “Hootcha?”

Not long ago Mister Kidd could not speak a word of any language, still did not understand much of what his own parents said, and came from a multicultural neighborhood so to not understand what others had to say was quite ordinary for him. Usually the first thing that anyone asked was your name. Mister remembered that princesses were treated differently from other people and remembered that men always bowed and women curtsied. So he bowed first then said “My name is Mister Kidd.”

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The boy seemed to have said something like, “Mind is behind red,” which didn’t make much sense. Perhaps he was speaking Pedestrian or Gibberish. In that case he could be visiting royal who had gotten lost in the castle. It was very important to maintain good relations with the neighboring countries. The boy seemed confident and had the most outlandish pair of shoes Mehlilcha had ever seen. If he didn’t know to take off his shoes then he must be from a distant country and could be very important. He did not kneel so he was of royal blood. Mehlilcha more politely enquired, “Welcome to my simple room, sir. What is your pleasure?”

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The princess said, “Bintahlahwa mullykroomum pleshan. Hoontalah klamanus?” Having already exhausted his rather meager knowledge of royal protocol Mister did not know what to do next, but the girl appeared to be about five years old and just a little bigger than himself. There were low free-standing shelves with a huge array of dolls of cloth. There was what looked like a map in the corner but real, with real miniature brown mountains with green valleys, fields with little ceramic horses and cows and camels and elephants and wooden trees with tiny red apples, and tiny sailing ships on what seemed to be real water. Being a very active child Mister was seldom in his own room but to sleep. Not only was his room much smaller than this it was almost bare except for his bed and a poster of the More Grinders football team that Mister sometimes used for target practice. Not being the patient sort Mister got straight to the point. He asked, “Do you want to play army?”

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The boy said something like “Duyuwan t’plyrme” which was like no tongue Princess Mehlilcha knew. She held her arm out to him palm up then swept it to show that he was welcome to choose whatever he liked. The boy did not hesitate. He went directly to the model of the land almost running in his haste, grabbed some of the mounted horses, and lined them up for a game of Botch. Mehlilcha did the same for the other team. The boy moved out his first pair but was too rough with the fragile horses. Mehlilcha moved her pair gently and made a motion at the leg like breaking a match and the boy seemed to understand. Whatever his name he was fun to play with, not too shy and not too rough. Mehlilcha wanted to know his name. She pointed at him and asked, “Please tell me your name?”

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The army men had no weapons but that didn’t bother Mister Kidd. The princess showed him that the thin legs of the horses would break easily, then pointed at him and asked, “Hoontalus cha?” Mister pointed at himself and said, “Mister Kidd,” then at the princess and asked “Hoontalus cha?”

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The boy answered “Behind red” again, which seemed a very odd and funny name, if it indeed was his name, then pointed at her and asked the princesses name in a thick accent. The Princess said, “Princess Mehlilcha,” then pointed at the boy and asked, “Behind red?” The boy nodded, which also seemed very odd and funny. This fidgeting tornado of boyhood could not possibly be sleepy or bored, so why was he nodding? Poor Behind Red, bored to sleep by royalty and Botch. The princess began to giggle, then tried to stop giggling which only made her giggle more until she began to start laughing, then tried to stop laughing and the sputtering made her turn red in the face and laugh even harder. At this moment there was a knock at the door. Behind Red started and seemed to look a little bit scared. Often children in the castle were not where they were supposed to be, hiding from unwanted studies or duties. Mehlilcha knew how to take care of that. She ran to the bed, lifted the curtains so that Behind Red could get underneath. He ran and dove through the opening, rather too noisily.

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The princess’ name seemed to be Talahoon Melincha. Just then there was a knock on the door. Adults! The eternal enemies of fun. Talahoon knew exactly what to do. From under the bed Mister heard her say, “Lilipus cha” and an adult came into the room. There was a short conversation. Mister Kidd had never heard an adult bossed around by a kid before, and soon the adult left, the door closed, the Princess’ small feet pattered to the bed then the heavy curtain moved and her giggling face stuck under it, her big smile showing all four top front teeth missing. Mister made a funny face to make fun of her funny face and the princess giggled even harder, then made a funny face of her own. After a few faces it was hot under the bed and Mister Kidd decided to show the Princess how to have some real fun. He wiggled by her into the room then pulled aside the curtain, lifted himself onto the bed and began to jump up and down. The eyes of the Princess followed him up and down, like she had never seen this before. The bed didn’t seem to have any springs so the jumping wasn’t as much fun as at home. Mister had an idea. He could swing from those tassels like Jungle Johnson Junior on a vine. He grabbed an especially sturdy one and said “Look at me!”

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After the boy was hidden Princess Mehlilcha said, “Enter, please” and a chambermaid came in to check on the unusual noises from the room. Mehlilcha said everything was fine and told the maid she had leave to go, then dove under the bed herself and made funny faces with the boy. He went out and jumped on the bed, which was a new game for the Princess, then grabbed the bell rope. “No! No!” the Princess whispered loudly, She stuck out both arms to the boy, palms toward him and waved them back and forth. “No!”

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The Princess got a worried look and whispered,, “Nix! Nix!” Mister dropped the rope but it was too late. There was a loud knock on the door.

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The Princess said “Go away!” but then heard the voice of the Mistress Of The Royal Chamber, who had authority from her father. “Under the bed!” she whispered, and pointed down. Mister moved with his usual noisy speed. “You may enter,” said the princess.



The Mistress was a gentle sort and seemed concerned. “Lady Princess, you have never before rung so loudly. Whatever could be the matter?” The Princess replied, “I, um, uh, slipped and fell and pulled the rope.”



The Mistress was used to the shenanigans of castle children and smelled a rat. “May I examine the room?” The Princess nodded yes. If she said no, the Mistress would get the Lord Chamberlain, and if she said no to him it would be a Junior Advisor to the Throne, then an Ordinary, then a Senior, then finally her father. The Mistress bent over to peer under the bed and lifted the heavy curtain.

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Mister Kidd could see dark hair. This was not the Princess. There was a musical sound of wind and doors slamming and Mister was back under the horse chestnut tree in More.

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The Mistress heard the sound of wind and doors slamming. There could be no wind here under the bed and the doors were too heavy to be moved by wind at any rate. Though it was dark underneath she felt certain something had moved, but there was nothing there. The Mistress searched the closets and under the pillows and the balcony finding nothing. It seemed a false alarm, but she felt certain something was up. Whatever could it be? “Thank you Princess. I am terribly sorry to have disturbed you,” said the Mistress. Mehlilcha replied, “Thank you too. Have a nice day.”


You might think the Princess would be puzzled by Mister’s escape but this was not so. Her mother came by most evenings to read her only child to sleep with fairy tales and stories, and should the Queen not then the Mistress did so, so while Princess Mehlilcha had never before met a magician she knew one when she saw one. They could appear and disappear and turn stones into gold and people into frogs, though this magician being rather young might not yet have learnt all of that.


Tonight was one of the evenings the Queen did not come to put her daughter to sleep. The Mistress of The Chamber returned to dress the Princess for bed and the Princess requested her favorite book, the one of lands far away, where flowers grew to be one hundred linik high and little girls flew on magic horses. The Mistress had a soft, low voice, the rhythm of the writing was soothing, of clocks and combs and of curds and cockerels and the change that can come over countries of calm, and as usual by the third page the little girl with waves and big curls in her golden hair was fast asleep on her side, both hands tucked between pillow and head.

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