The Camel

He rode through the streets, his head held high; his ride was the best around. People stared, mouths open. A small child cried out and pointed. Yes. This man’s camel was by far the best around.
It was the best in this town, the best in the last and the man felt the next one and the one to follow it too, all the way to his destination, the distant land known only as ‘the spring of Ah-leese’. An epic destination befitting his epic journey and camel.

In a nearby alleyway however, trouble lurked, hidden behind a dumpster. Waiting. Three men in the shadows. One was tall and another had but one eyebrow. They rode camels –regular at best. The third sat on a donkey. He would be shorter standing up. They watched the man and his marvellous camel with hunger in their eyes. That camel practically glowed. They were thieves. Mammal lifters, Outlaws, and they had found their next target. It would procure a hefty sum in the city, but none of the men would intend to sell it, no. they resolved to keep it, each of them for themselves. Each envisioned ditching the others and escaping into the sunset. As thieves do.

Smiles grew on their faces as they watched the man park his camel outside a local convenience store. Convenient indeed. The little one sniffed and licked his lips, as the man dismounted. The second the man passed through the automatic doors, they moved into action; casually, but not too casually. They clopped out from behind the dumpster, nearly trampling a surprised kid. One yawned and stretched loudly. One man who briefly shot them a weird look but no one else, in the thickly packed streets really noticed. Besides the kid, who limped off swearing and shaking a fist in their general direction.

One of the camels spat. They sat for a moment, making sure no one was watching, and then they zoomed over, surprisingly fast and parked near the spectacular camel. They jumped from their rides and were next to it, in a matter of seconds. They stood for a moment. The little one picked his nose.
“Damn I think it’s locked” said the tall one.
The little one rubbed his hands; now was his time to shine, for he was a master of locks. The other two stood back watching as he worked his magic. A few spectators gathered, mesmerized. He muttered a bit, and swore a lot but soon, a click indicated that his work was done.

The thieves looked around to see if anyone was watching. The small crowd quickly looked away and pretended to be very interested in a nearby shop sign. Bunnings. The criminals, confident in their skills of espionage, two of them turned their attention towards the convenience store. No sign of the camel’s owner.
They turned back to find the little one struggling his way onto the camel. Rather unsuccessfully.
“Hey, hey, hey. What do you think you’re doing?” said the tall thief.
“Getting on the camel!’ said the short man defensively.
“Why!?” said the man with the monobrow, shocked.
“so we can steal It, you boob” responded the midget. “it’s not gonna’ ride itself away with us.”
He had a point. The other two were momentarily stumped and a brief semi-silence followed. The short one continued his muttering struggle upside the bored looking camel.
“Why you!? Who said you would do it?” asked the tallest thief suddenly.
“Me!” shouted said the small thief.
“No! I should do it!” shouted monobrow, pulling the short one from the camel.
They argued for a while, and the watching crowd grew. One kid held up a phone, recording.

Nearby, an unrelated thief down on his luck noticed the short thief’s donkey and, realising that you can’t lock a donkey, jumped onto it and rode it off, laughing manically as he wobbled past the three criminals. The short one noticed this and with a swearing exclamation ran a short distance after it, arms waving, swearing loudly and threatening the slowly disappearing man’s mother.
But in this personal tragedy, he found his excuse. Puffing slightly, he rejoined the still arguing two.

“That settles it.” He proclaimed.
“Ha!” said one “see, two against one. I get to ride it.” said the monobrow guy looking jubilant.
“no.” said shortie. Monobrow’s expression deflated. “I get to ride it. Mine just got stolen, I have no ride. Therefore I have to ride the camel.”
The other two frowned and resigned. It did not occur to them that they could let him ride on of their camels as they rode it, thus prolonging the argument. They stood back and watched with dark expressions on their faces as he struggled his way onto the camel. They resolved to betray the others at the next chance, never considering that each other where planning the same thing, nor even suspecting that their short companion was right now planning how to ditch them.

Just at that moment the camel’s owner emerged from the shop, a coke in one hand, a magazine in the other. He walked a short distance, smiling a smile that loved life, then stopped with a frown as he saw the gathering around his beloved camel.
‘what are yous doing!?” he shouted, making the thieves jump. The crowd laughed, and then hurriedly went back to staring at the bunnings sign as the thieves shot them a suspicious look.
“Getting out of here!” laughed the midget, only to realise the camel wouldn’t start, ruining his dramatic exit. It was still locked. “Shit.”

The man, his angry face not very threatening (more comical really) reached for something on his belt.
The two standing thieves had their weapons out in a flash and held them high, as the man pulled out his car keys.
“Oh.” The criminals stared blankly, weapons lowered and less threatening. The man began to walk forward, pointing the keys at them and pressing a button on a remote on the key ring. There was a dull blooping sound and the camel shifted slightly, moving for the first time since he got off it.
‘Fool!” the midget laughed, kicking the side of the camel. It didn’t move, just looked at it’s owner. He whistled and tilted his head towards the other two thieves. The camel nodded and turned it’s head to face them. The thieves and the camel stared at each other for a moment, then the camel, in the style of a rapid fire weapon, spat at them. The thieves screamed and ran away.
“Cowards!” shouted shortie. The man looked relieved and he walked over without fear and patted his camel. The little guy, still on the camel, swore and kicked at him with his little legs, missing by far. The man didn’t say a word, he just walked up beside the camel and, smiling, pushed shortie off the camel. Seemingly unable to hear the thief swearing, he mounted his camel and reversed out. The crowd clapped and cheered as he rode off, through green lights, into the sunset and away.