What Animal I Would Be....

Answering the question to what animal I would be...

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Searching for answers, seeking some clue
To my 'Indian' name- oh I wished for a few
Prancing Tiger! Moon Dancer!
Even Bright Star would be fine
But, drats! The decision's not mine

You must be gifted your name
It is quite the mysterious game
Signals, signs, dreams, schemes
Ignoring the obvious until my ancestors screamed
TALKING CROW- ya right, in your dreams!

Those creatures are nasty, vile and mean
Can’t I be a panther so dark and so lean?
What about a house cat then-at least they're clean!
I knew my answer; I must deal with the truth
To deny my great ancestors would be uncouth.

When Kristi invited me to submit my application to The First Peoples', I was excited. We then discussed my Native American Name. Hers is Sundancer- very pretty, don't you think? I tried to find a suitable name, one that I would be proud of, one that was beautiful. I, however, would not get to pick out my own name, it would be given to me. I was accepted into the group, knowing without a doubt, what my name would have been if my ancestors could have named me at birth. As I try to embrace the crow, a question was asked by a member of the First Peoples' Tribe, "What kind of animal are you?"

I asked Kristi what she expected me to write about.

"Oh, it can be about any animal. It doesn't have to be about the Crow, it can be about what you would want to be, it could be anything."

She knows I am having a hard time being 'Talking Crow'- although she laughs every time I mention hating my name, she was opening the possibility to choose what animal I would be if I could pick any animal. I tried to think about what animal I would choose to be and why. It should be easy, but it was not. I mean, who would not want to be some sleek cat or powerful bear? Perhaps I should pick something cute like a hummingbird or mysterious- an ocean animal? My mind kept being drawn back to the crow for some reason. I felt this odd impulse to write about the one animal I would never have thought I would choose to be, but in fact, the crow is me.

I researched a bit about the crow. I came upon an old Native American Folklore. It is the tale of 'The Rainbow Crow'. It was quite pretty. I shall try and recreate what I read in my own words and in short fashion.

The Rainbow Crow~ Retold by 'Talking Crow'

The crow was once a beautiful bird. It was adorned with a beautiful coat- the color of rainbows blended into each individual feather. The crow had a beautiful singing voice, enchanting all the other animals with its beautiful song. One day snow and ice came and covered all the lands. The animals of these lands suffered greatly in their frigid environment. It was decided that one of them needed to go and see the great creator and plead for warmth. No other animals were able to go, for various reasons, so the crow took on the task.

The crow flew to the land of the great Creator, past the moon and stars and past the blazing sun. The journey was hard and eventually he reached their God. The crow pleaded for him to take away the cold. The Great one explained, destroying the cold was not possible, the snow and ice had spirits of their own. They could not be destroyed, but they could be tamed. The Creator- Who creates by thinking what will be- created a fire spirit. The Creator took a stick and held it to the sun, then handed the burning stick to the crow.

"Take this and hurry before the stick burns up."

The crow flew as fast as he could, as he was passing by the sun once more, his tail caught on fire. His feathers continued to burn and as he plummeted through the clouds. By the time he reached the earth, he was covered with soot and he had lost his beautiful singing voice. He had paid a high price to save the others. He would no longer be beautiful, but the Earth was saved. The crow did not join in on the celebrations being held because he was so sad about what he had sacrificed-his beauty of which he was so proud. The Creator spoke to him. He told him that he would always be remembered and honored. Suddenly, the crows black feathers became glossy. When the crow held up his wing to the light, the rainbow colors could be seen through each feather. The Creator explained that the crow would no longer have to fear being hunted by creatures, as his meat would taste of smoke. He would never be caged by man for his black feathers and horse voice would not be sought after. He would always be free.

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As I read the tale of the crow, I realized that even the most seemingly unattractive things can be beautiful- if you have the ability to look past what you see at first glance. I actually can relate to the crow in some ways. I have some of the same totem qualities of the crow. I have chosen to look at some of the uglier aspects of myself and my life and see the beauty that can be found- if I take the time to look at it in a different perspective. I now see the beauty in what I originally thought was an ugly bird. When I inspected the crow further, I realized the beauty of this wonderful creature of the Creator of All.

I have read many other positive things about what I thought to be a very ugly totem. I am ashamed at my disrespect towards my ancestors in not embracing the gift they bestowed- my name. Talking Crow, that's me!

Side note: I have always been mesmerized by rainbows and plagued by crows...I think I understand why now.

This is an informative page if you wish to know more about the crow totem http://www.apathtowholeness.net/essences/animal-totem-essences/birth-totem-crow. I do not have the crow totem from birth, I am just sure that this would be my name if named at birth. This site tells you all your birth totems by month of birth. Very interesting as my birth totem is Snow Goose. What is yours?


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