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Does everything we do, get us ready for sex? |
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"A Case of Freud" By Shannon Ray Through out history, sex has played a major role. Wars have been started due to it (Helen of Troy). Clothing has been created to hide it (think Victorian area) or to enhance it (think rubber, leather and latex).The type of beer and automobile we purchase are due to hidden sexual messages in the ads. Even the expression “getting laid” dates back to the customers of a 1900’s Chicago bordello the “Everleigh”. (“I’m going to get Everleighed tonight”). Some feel that our very existence comes down to simply getting laid. That sex is the primary motivation for existence. Sigmund Freud was one of those people. His belief that everything we do is in relation to sex. Case in point: Being a pet owner shows the "softer" side of one's persona: a caretaker, a giver. Earning a paycheck shows that you are stable and able to provide. Showering and brushing your teeth (besides the fact that they are indeed general hygiene) are also things that attract us- the "great" smile and smell. Even though there are some of us who chose not to mate, we are inherently sexual creatures, just by virtue of being in a physical body and in relationship to the world around by senses, thoughts, and feelings. In the end, it’s all smoke and mirrors to attract someone into our “sexual web”. Sex is wired into our brains- whether we like it our not. But when put on the racks, we get defensive about those three little letters: S E X. No matter your social class, income level, gender role or credit history- sex is a part of our lives. Either we are not getting enough or too much. It’s either too kinky or too vanilla for our taste buds. Our partners are either too fast on the draw or too slow for words. Sex rarely seems to be just right. But when it is, it’s the equal to a starvation diet that ends with a buffet. It’s the best we ever had and we’re not too proud to beg for more. And though you may not agree with the bearded one or me we both have a point: In the end, is sex the reason? Give it a moment and think about it. How vigilant would we be in our primping ritual if sex weren’t the wanted result in the end? Would a Stairmaster really be a high priority if no one were there to watch our asses? That last piece of pizza or cheese Danish would be finished off with a smile instead of a dismal sigh of calculating calories. And even when we do get the prize, is it really worth it? Wouldn’t all this be much easier if we purchased a vibrator and lived like we wanted to? Let’s take for example a typical relationship: You meet and are groomed from your non-showing roots to your freshly painted toenails. You’re on your best behavior; all the time your hormones are in overdrive. The courting process has officially begun. This means that you must wear only your sexiest underwear, shave and moisturize your legs, and carry extra breath mints in the purse that you never used to carry. Because after all, you need to look both sexy and organized when trying to get some. You’re beyond witty, beyond charming, beyond anything you’ve ever been. This is no ordinary persona, this is “super you”. This is your “gonna get me some” self. Finally the big night arrives. You’ve polished, waxed, shaved, trimmed, and tweezed as much as possible. There are enough candles to light a small village. Hours have been spent cleaning the entire house, even the kitchen walls. Just in case there’s a pre-sex inspection. The fresh sheets are soon no more. The sex monster has beckoned and you have answered the call. All the time, wishing you had caller I.D. Soon enough, you’ll be wearing your faded flowered underwear instead of the black thong. Your roots will be showing, proving that you’re really not a true blonde, brunette or redhead. Some dismiss this as the “groove” of a relationship. But let’s face some facts. The let down has happened, the sexual conquest is over and it wasn’t much to write home about. And all that’s left is some melted down candles and stale breath mints. Before long, we’ll be primping with in an itch of our lives and on the prowl. Maybe a bit wiser this time. But in truth, we never really learned our lessons. If we luck out tonight, it’s back to scrubbed walls and organizational clutches. If not, I suggest investing in a vibrator and a brownie or two. |
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