My thoughts on global climate change.

                                        The Inconvenienced Truth

If you want people to listen to you about Global warming, don’t associate it with saving the planet. The planet is fine and it has been fine for about 4.66 billion years now. We all realize that fact, right? So, to sell your argument, you must present it in an honest light: The planet doesn’t give a fuck. -If I may speak for the planet- It simply exist without any need to control anything, including its temperature, its life span or the life span of anything on it. The planet doesn’t need saving, we do.

Help save human civilization. That’s the real goal. Right? Help keep human civilization in it’s current pristine condition? God, if we didn’t act on global climate change, thousands of people could die. We humans always selflessly fight to prevent the senseless death of other human beings. Fucking blow me. If you try to make that argument, your full of shit. Oh yes, that’s all this is, a courageous act to save innocent people. Well guess what? You can’t save human civilization. Because you would first have to get rid of all the humans. And that would defeat the whole purpose. Human civilization, has been, and always will be, one huge fuck up after another. If your lucky, you might be able to maintain it in its current state, which is pretty fucked. That’s just us, so that argument, out the fucking window.

And your not going to save civilization by driving your electric car to the organic food co-op, to buy groceries with your canvas bags. Because while you’re putting your groceries into your energy efficient refrigerator, and cleaning your solar panels, five-hundred people starved to death. This bullshit idea that, having a small carbon foot print is going to some how save civilization, or the planet, is so disgustingly pretentious that it makes me sick to my stomach. -a personal note, but my therapist told me to get out- All it’s going to lead to is a landscape of beautiful, pristine, shiny, white neighbor hoods, powered only by wind and solar energy, glistening, peacefully in the sun light. Until they’re invaded and burnt to the ground by angry, starving, under-educated-poor-people. Not the best way to go about saving humanity and definitely not getting the Earth excited. All though, it would look cool, the invasion, that is.

Another bullshit argument: Green energy is cleaner than black energy. -I say black energy because the two major fossil fuels are coal and oil- Now, that is true, but it doesn’t really mean much. Because the most common act, and really the only act people partake in, in relation to using green energy to decrease their use of black energy, is the act of purchasing a hybrid vehicle, or a more fuel efficient vehicle, which really doesn‘t make any difference at all. In fact, burping and farting creates more green house gasses than our vehicles do. So driving a fuel efficient vehicle doesn’t really directly impact the climate of our planet. But, it does get you pussy at the vegan café. As for the biggest users of fossil fuel in the world, they’re also some of the biggest money makers in the world, so we’ll see what the politicians and the powerful do about regulating their use of black energy, I’m guessing they’ll either pinch some of their profits, or do nothing at all. What do you think? Another empty idea, that isn’t saving humanity, and isn’t preventing global climate change, and definitely isn’t saving the planet. “My Hybrid doesn’t use gas when its coasting.” What a fucking hero.

Okay, we’ve established that the planet doesn’t need saving. We’ve also established that saving the human civilization, is like saving cancer, doesn’t make much sense, because the human civilization is already killing itself in a million different ways. We’ve also established that driving a hybrid will only lead to better gas mileage and occasional sex with a vegan. But, there are a couple of arguments that have an honest ring to them.

For example: Help save precious real-estate. That’s what this is mainly about. Because, realistically, for the most part, when compared to the usual natural and man-made catastrophes, not a lot of people are going to die as a result of global climate change, but a lot of people are going to be displaced. So the rich are thinking, “oh fuck, all these people that we’ve been pissing and shitting on for all these years are about to be flushed up here, because the toilet has over flowed. And we’ll have to arrange to house them, like we already have to do for homeless people, poor people, the mentally ill and retarded people. We don’t want all of these colored people here too, fucking up our profit margins.” Now there’s a valid argument, and an honest one. You don’t want to be inconvenienced. The Inconvenienced Truth. After all, one-billion South American, Indian and African refugees would definitely be an inconvenience. And what about the Floridians. You think we have a Segway problem now, just wait for that invasion. A decent argument, too many people, not enough space. But nothing we do is going to change the global climate. Too many starving poor people who don’t give a fuck. And the biggest polluters, are also the most powerful, so they’ll continue doing whatever the fuck they want to do.

So, having said the above, the only go green idea, that I find to be bullshit free is: We get most of our black energy from middle eastern countries, and our foreign policy is directly influenced by our need to extract our energy from these countries. And America’s foreign policy lies at the root of a lot of America’s big problems; 9/11, The Iraq War, the Gulf War, Islamic extremism, just to name a few. So cutting back on the amount of black energy we use would cut back on the amount of time we spend fucking up middle eastern countries, which would cut back on the amount of time middle easterners spend fucking up our country. We finally find a rational argument, go green, get us the fuck out of the middle east. But it might even be to late for that, I think Islamic extremism is here to stay, but its worth a shot.

So, using green energy would save some lives, and possibly cut back on war, which would indeed help contribute to the bettering of humanity, at least, a little, for now. But it wouldn’t be doing anything for the planet. So stop fucking saying that, its fucking annoying, pretentious, self-righteous, very misleading and counter productive.

Just another way for people to feel like their making an impact, with out really having to  do anything, except be fashionable and hip. You want to make an impact? Take a homeless guy in, take a mentally retarded person in, feed the starving. You’ll only impact people directly. With direct actions, person to person. That’s all we can do. And I have a funny feeling that all of these go green, flag wavers, will be the first to turn away any refugees, you don’t need them fucking up your go green bamboo flooring.

So remember, go green, its better than going black. But, once you go black, its hard to go back.