Blank Always Works

Blank Always Works


“Moods for sale!” the vendor yelled loudly on the side of the crowded street. Kids of every shape and size were having a typical day outside. Everyone was laughing and playing around, except for me. Maybe my mother was right; I probably needed a new mood. Here was my time to buy a new one. I started walking toward the rather large, completely bald man beside the cart that was filled with moods, when it suddenly occurred to me. What kind of mood did I want? The most practical choice had to be happy.

“Smiley faces,” I thought to myself, “Yellow flowers in the hand of a smiling little girl. Happy is me and my friend walking on the beach laughing for no reason at all, or my cat purring a soft tune when I pet her. I am not happy.”

Then there are those few people who choose to be sad. The first thing that pops into my mind is the color blue. Maybe sad is the cold rain that falls in April, or the sickness of a close family member. Sadness is the big, wet tear that slides down my cheek like it’s riding on a roller coaster. I am not sad.

“We’ve got anger, loving, confused, curious, hopeful, mellow, silly, touched, blank, giddy, hyper, excited, and many more!” the mood vendor called out for everyone to hear.

“Wow! There are so many to choose from,” I thought. There were so many, in fact, that I ended up asking the man which one was the most popular.

“Well, little girl,” the man told me, “I’d have to say that kids your age like to pick excited.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a vile of bright green liquid.

“Excited,” I said, kind of confused. The man gave me a sly smile.

“Oh, you must currently be confused. I think excited would be a good change for you,” he said with a wink.

“Is he kidding?” I thought, “Confused is more like the fist day of kindergarten. Confused is my mother trying to help me with my math homework. Confused is my dog when I act like I’m throwing a ball and she chases after nothing. Confused is the blank look on my face as I’m looking at this man, trying to figure out if he’s being serious. I am not confused.”

“You want to try a sample of excited?” he asked me. “It only lasts about five minutes.”

“Um… sure,” I hesitate with answering. The man took out a liquid dropper and filled it up.

“Now hold out your tongue, girl,” he ordered. I did as I was told and he squeezed a drop of green liquid onto my tongue. Thoughts flooded my head instantly.

“Pizza is for dinner tonight, yum! Tomorrow is Friday, so close to the weekend! I can see my new baby cousin on Sunday! Movies are tonight with my best friend! I can’t wait to go to school, so then it’ll be closer to the end of today! When I get home mom will drive me to the store so I can by those shoes I’ve been wanting for over two weeks now!” The thoughts just kept coming and coming until the five minutes were up.

“I am not excited,” I told the man.

“Okay then,” he said slowly. “Let’s try some cranky.” He filled the little dropper with dark orange liquid and squeezed another drop onto my tongue. A bitter taste filled my mouth and my eyebrows crinkled down on my forehead in a grimace.

“Gosh those other kids are so loud. This man is getting on my nerves. Why is he staring at me? People are so weird. I wish everyone else was some animal, that way they could never talk. I may never have a stupid migraine like I do right now if the sun wasn’t so bright. The air is too muggy today for me to even breathe. If that guy over there doesn’t stop staring at my hair, I think I might punch him,” I thought.

“I am not cranky,” I told the man. He sighed loudly and shoved some vials around inside his cart.

“Aha!” he exclaimed, holding up a bottle of bright, shiny, pink liquid, which read: CURIOUS. For the third time now, he plopped a drop of liquid onto my tongue. Weird thoughts immediately made their way into my head.

“Is there life on Mars? If people didn’t know a few hundred years ago that the earth revolved around the sun, then how did they know when a year was, or what year it was? Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle? Should vegetarians eat animal crackers? Isn’t it a little bit unnerving that doctors call what they do ‘practice’? How is it that a building burns up as it burns down? Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?” The questions faded as the five minutes timed out.

“I am not curious,” I told the man. The man was very annoyed by now and I could tell that he did not want to be here right now. “Are there anymore I should try?” I asked.

The man squinted his beady, little eyes while he nodded his head slowly, rubbing hairy chin. “Yes. Yes, there is one that always works.” He dug around in his square cart until he found a shimmery, white liquid. He handed me the bottle, telling me to swallow it all. I braced myself for the emotion that was soon going to overpower me. This time no thoughts came to my mind. I thought of nothing, nothing at all.

“Well?” the man asked.

I shrugged and said, “I am blank.”