Detention Slip

Wally Dreyfuss was paler than usual but seemed to be in a deep trance. We were staring in disbelief at such a sight. Ms. Lorian, our eighth grade English teacher, lay on the cold, tiled floor at the end of the stairs. She was not moving as so were we.  Goosebumps swiftly crawled on my arms. Wally seemed to be looking around, his cheeks turning to normal. Gordon, the janitor, was standing next to Ms. Lorian holding a Styrofoam cup of coffee. He stared at disbelief but was motionless. He was slow-witted but he was the only adult around during this late in the afternoon.  Like a snap of a branch, Gordon finally snapped back to reality.

          



“Huh? - Hey, hey, hoodlums, get out of here, give the lady some air.”

Gordon carried Ms. Lorian to the teacher’s lounge. He stumbled several times, for Ms. Lorian was not such a delicate flower. Ms. Lorian had been here taught for about five years. In those five years, she had grown with the students. Maybe it’s because of all the presents they give her since she is a really cool teacher. She dresses like a nun, very conservative, always with a beige vest, a black skirt and black polished shoes. Her hair had become whiter every year, but the white would be replaced temporarily with a bright red, brown, or even blonde one time.

Gordon was more or less the same age as Ms. Lorian. For being a custodian, he was a real mess. He was unshaven, very lanky and smelt of cheap room deodorant. His attire consisted of two jumpsuits, one that had the nametag “Dashiell”. He also wore a blue cap, which looked like had been run over several times. He had been working for about 35 years and his only exit would be retirement, which was not too far away. 

We followed Gordon to the teacher’s longue where he placed Ms. Lorian on the couch. It was already an hour past normal school hours here at Dupin Middle School.

“What are we going to do wit’ ‘er?” Gordon asked incredulously.

Wally stepped forward, checked her pulse and put his hand over her forehead. He was in control and did not hesitate. His color was back and he looked determined.

“Well, she seems to be okay. She is just passed out. There does not seem to be any indication of external injury. Let her rest and see what her condition is. In the meantime, is there a phone so we can contact an ambulance?” Wally demanded confidently. 

For a fourteen year old, he sounded wise beyond his years sometimes. Wally was a loner, but he loved books. However, I would talk to Wally frequently since I was Ms. Lorian’s assistant and my mother would always go to his father’s pharmacy, where he worked on the weekends. During the weekday, Wally would stay at school and read mystery fiction books from Ms. Lorian’s small library, and would sometimes bring from the public library as well. At his rate, he could have finished the public library in a month. Today was no different than any other day.

Gordon shushed us out of the teacher’s longue and walked to the principal’s office to call for assistance

Me and Wally stayed behind outside the teacher’s lounge.

“Good thing Gordon was here, huh, Wally?”

“Or maybe it is too much of a coincidence.”

“What do you mean? If it wasn’t for him, then we could have never helped Ms. Lorian. Why would he even do anything to her?”

“Oh, but he does have a motive.” There was a sudden blink in Wally’s dark brown eyes “Gordon is getting on in years and it’s taking a toll on his job performance, if you may have noticed.”

I agreed. Recently, he had been known to be one of the least competent janitors in the history of the world. He would never clean the halls right. The bathroom walls were a mess. He had also become so absent-minded that would often forget to lock the doors. Once, some punks got inside the Biology Lab and messed it all up with a soccer ball. No ever caught them, and only the soccer ball was found in the lab next to a field of broken glass.

“But what does it have to do with this?” I asked, even though I had an idea why.



“Don’t you remember what happened a couple of days ago? For being Ms. Lorian’s assistant, Rudy Kip, you don’t pay attention to what she does.  Anyway, Ms. Lorian went into the bathroom and as usual in this school, it was a mess. However, there were cigarette butts on the toilet. Ms. Lorian was furious. Gordon, who was supposed to have been cleaning, was nowhere to be found. Ms. Lorian looked in the gym, the music hall and saw that the maintenance closet was unlocked as the other rooms were. Finally, Ms. Lorian found Gordon calmly taking a nap in the teacher’s lounge.  She started yelling at him and reported him to the principal the next day. They say if it is his last straw before he is fired.”

“You think he might hold a grudge for that?”

“I do believe so. He was also the first one in the scene and he did not do anything to help her, he just stood there staring at her for who knows how long before we arrived. He might have thought there was no one here at school. It is well past the time we get out and we are the only ones here besides Cindi Haulper in detention.”

“Hey, where is she anyway, last time I saw her she asked Ms. Lorian to go to the restroom.”

“You are right, Rudy.” Wally exclaimed. Does he think he it is a mystery to solve? I thought it had been an accident, but it seems those mystery stories are getting to his head.

We rushed through the door and up the stairs. On the first step of the second floor, Wally found his first clue- a lonely mop lying beside the stairs.

          



“How I did not notice that, I have to be more careful!” Wally said as he inspected the mop. He touched the mop as it was still a little wet; it had been used not a hour ago. Wally inspected the area, and could not find anything else, the floor, if it had been wet, was already dried up. As we were searching, we heard some noises coming from the other stairs. Without hesitation, we ran toward the other stairs and caught a shadow and some their accompanying footsteps. Her long black hair gave her away, it was Cindi. She was not alone her boyfriend Bernard Shuflin was beside her. Bernard and Cindi were the Sid and Nancy of middle school. They would often be seen together, mocking the faculty and causing mischief. In the classes where they were not together, they would text one thousand texts per second. Their phones would be confiscated constantly in the teacher’s desk but they often mysteriously escape by the next day only for the same thing to happen that same day. 

“Ah, crap, what the hell, I thought you were gone.” Cindi said staring at us from the lower level.

“Ms. Lorian had an accident just right now. She seems to be okay but-“

“I don’t give a shit, loser” exclaimed Bernard as he was stomping up the stairs.          

I can say from personal experience that Bernard is the meanest bully in school. In fact, beating up kids, taking away their money and being annoying were the only reasons he would come to school at all. It was so unfair that in middle school, there is always a guy that looks like he could be a teacher. He wore black military boots and a plaid t-shirt which wrapped his tremendous girth. He was very tall and had to shave three times a day or so I have heard. It didn’t help that he had been left behind a couple of years, though. Bernard was also a petty thief in progress. He stole books, pencils, pans and spoons or even money from other students and faculty.  He could basically get away with anything since he was really sneaky. His stomps made the floor tremble with each step, or maybe it was me who was trembling.

“I hope that bitch never wakes up, so I don’t have to see her dumb, ugly face, again.”

“What are you guys doing here anyway?” Wally asked strongly and without hesitation.

“What’s it look like, turd? I was waitin’ for my girl.” Replied Bernard between pants. “That old broad doesn’t know shit; she gave Cindi detention for the rest of the week for nothin’.”

“Yeah.” Cindi added with an attitude

“I mean, we were just messing around with Gordon, we wasn’t doin’ any harm to no one, we were just goofing around, rite, baby?.”

“Yeah.” Cindi agreed enthusiastically.

“I almost made the record! We was going to see who would throw more paper balls at Gordon from the patio. But then that “Ms. Lowride” came, if it wasn’t for her messin’ where she’s not supposed to. Only she saw Cindi and gave her detention, but she’s outta there.”

“Yeah- hey!” Cindi had a moment of clarity for once “She only gave me detention, what the hell? You were playing, too. It’s not fair” Cindi finally realized how low her boyfriend was.

“But, hey, I. Hey, babe. Didn’t you give her that box of chocolates I told you to give her. Remember, the chocolates so she would let you go. I did it all for you, babe, because I care for you.”

“Aww, I am sorry, Berni-poo, I love you, too!” Cindi shrieked

Her moment of clarity was gone just was fast as it had come.

“A-hem…Guys, you did not see anything suspicious happening when Ms. Lorian left.” Wally asked the sick couple.

“No, nothing, nada, nope. But maybe you could ask that dumbass janitor. I saw him, downstairs a while ago, the old fart. I was ready to practice my paper throwing at him.” Bernard guffawed and made a notion of throwing an imaginary ball.

Wally seemed to be going impatient at the coarseness of these two hoodlums. He finally let out the question.

“Hey, Cindi, you asked Ms. Lorian to go to the bathroom during detention. Where were you all this time?”

“Uh…I was in the restroom and when I came back to the classroom, everyone was gone, so I figured that you all had left. Bernie was waiting for me on the field outside. What you think I had anything to do with it?” She defended herself.

Bernard confronted Wally “Hey, you accusing my girl of something?”.

“Well, you two and Gordon were the only ones outside so you are the main suspects.”

Wally did not know in how much trouble he was getting. He was willing to cross the line.

“Suspects? What the hell, “Dickfuss”? You think I would have stuck around here. You calling me a liar or something?”

He grabbed Wally by the collar and put him up against the wall.

“You know what happens to little snitches who don’t shut their traps?”

Just as he was going to connect his fist to Wally’s face, a man’s voice yelled out. Everything stood still for a moment.

           



“Hey, you hoodlums, what are you still doin’ here? It’s time for you to go already, c’ mon , go, now!” Gordon ordered us.

“Hey, old man, what if we don’t wanna, what’re you gonna do, huh?” Bernard threatened the old tired man.

“I might call your parents, you, you…” Gordon held back. He wasn’t going to let go of his job for a middle school kid.

“Hey, Gordon, wait, I have to tell you something.” Wally stopped him from going back downstairs. 

“What do you want, kid?”

“Well, Gordon, I have reason to believe what happened to Ms. Lorian was not a mere accident. It was an set up.”

Gordon stood and looked at Wally without blinking. Bernard and Cindi paid close attention, as it they were waiting for the lottery numbers. I wandered why all of a sudden he had decided to finally confront Gordon about it.

“What do you mean? Y-you don’t know anything, you’re just a kid.” Gordon said nervously.

“Gordon, we found a mop by the stairs. Now, I believe you were mad at Ms. Lorian for what happened the other day. She humiliated you and almost cost you your job, is it not true?”

Gordon mumbled, but he did not make a coherent sentence. He looked down to the floor, like a kid who has been caught red-handed. Bernard and Cindi were snickering, though. Their greatest laughing stock would get what came to him.

“Now, the only ones inside the classroom this late were Rudy, Cindi and me. Cindi went to the restroom, claiming, “lady issues.” A strict policy of the teachers is to let the female students go no matter what.”

“I did need to go, you don’t know anything, loser.”

“Oh, you did need to go. We waited a while and the box of chocolates you gave Ms. Lorian for good conduct was almost finished. Strangely, Ms. Lorian, started to grab her stomach in pain. She headed to the restroom and never came back to the classroom. Rudy and I were left in the classroom waiting for both of you. After I finished my book, I decided to steal a little chocolate piece from Ms. Lorian and to my surprise I found something inside the chocolate.”

Cindi quickly defended herself  “It’s all lies, I tell you, I didn’t do anything!”

“What did you find, Wally?”

“A Vallax pill, which is a very powerful type of laxative.”

          



No one could say anything. Gordon stood listening, with his eyes fixed at directly at Wally. Cindi ran up to Bernard as if she was the victim. Bernard grabbed Cindi and tried to protect her, like a knight in shining armor.

“But she fell down the stairs, I don’t see the connection.” Gordon asked impatiently.

“Gordon did it!” Cindi said quickly.

Wally did not pay attention to her; everyone’s attention was on him. He was really putting the pieces together. “Well that covers why Ms. Lorian got out of the room in such a hurry, but not why she fell, but bear with me, everyone.

“I have better things to do than being here listening to BS. Let’s go, babe.” Bernard said as he grabbed Cindi. As they were about to leave, something amazing happened.

“No, you stay, you brat!” Gordon yelled out. He grabbed Bernard by the arm, but Bernard yanked it off. He did not say anything, but he actually stood in that spot.

“Go on kid, keep it moving.” Gordon demanded

“Oh, ok, well, Cindi was still in the restroom but she was doing what she really needed to do- smoke.”

“What, you’re crazy!” Cindi countered. Bernard just stood there and did not say anything.

“Ah, but it is true, you were smoking, for when we passed by the restroom, we smelt the smoke.”

It was true. I heard Ms. Lorian struggle with the restroom door for a couple of minutes. I thought that the door was locked since it was already late. Wally continued with his explanation.

“However, you panicked and locked the door so no one would get in. I heard some sort of struggle and heard Ms. Lorian yell at the stiff door when Rudy and I were in the classroom. The fuzz lasted for a while, about 5-6 min and then it stopped.”

Wally was on a roll, I had never thought about what had happened during that time. I was busy grading papers and Wally was reading his book. I did not even notice he was really paying attention to what was going on.

“Ms. Lorian was desperate by now, not only because she had to go to the restroom but now her special student, Cindi, was gone. Ms. Lorian must have run toward the stairs, she did not notice the wet floor and fell down the stairs. By the time we came to look for Ms. Lorian, we noticed the smoke on the restroom and rushed downstairs without noticing the mop. Then, we saw Ms. Lorian’s lying on the floor and Gordon as the first spectator.”

“Aha! So it was him.” Bernard finally spoke. “I mean with the mop and he was there, he was looking at his crime, thinking of what to do with the body!”

“What, I’m innocent. I could have never done such thing, you little monster!”

“It was you, old man, admit it!” Bernard was feeling pretty good about himself as if  had won a championship game.

“That is what I thought as well, Bernard.” Wally replied. “But Gordon had a cup of coffee in his hand. Now, he had been in trouble because of his sleeping on the job because who drinks coffee in the evening. Anyway, the only place in school with a coffee maker is the teacher’s lounge, Gordon’s former napping place.”

Gordon hesitated then admitted it “Yes, yes, exactly, I was doin’ that!” His tone was very relieved.

“He couldn’t have done it; he was in the teacher’s lounge making coffee. That leaves only two suspects, Cindi and you, Bernard. Cindi was in restroom smoking so she could have not been the one. Both Gordon and Cindi have a hard alibi. That only leaves your alibi, Bernard.”

“There’s a problem with your conclusion, dimwit, I was out on the field, remember? You are dumbass.” Bernard said very confidently.

“And you are not careful. Cindi may I borrow your cell phone?”

“No way, loser, in your dreams, if you want it, it is here, look-look lookie here” Cindi toyed with Wally. She dangled her phone in front of him and pulled it back when he was about to grab it.

With a sudden movement, Gordon, took the phone off the harpie’s claw. He handed the cell phone to Wally, who searched the messages. Bernard tried to take the phone from Wally, but Gordon stood between the two. He was better at being Wally’s new personal bodyguard than a custodian.

“Here are the messages you sent to Bernard at the time of your bathroom trip: [LOL, Im in da bathroom smokin ur last tubes, loser.] Second message [The old bags outside bangin’ I think  da chocolats workd!] and finally [U think shes goin to da downstairs restroom, damn PLAN FAILED >_< !]  But Ms. Lorian never did. Bernard knows when to act, at least when it is related to vandalism. You, Bernard, figured you could stop her from going to the restroom. You ran up the stairs and must have noticed the maintenance closet was unlocked.”

Gordon’s face glowed red, but he did not utter a word. He was either embarrassed or infuriated that someone else had pointed out his incompetence or because of the frame-up. Wally strutted down and up the hall and then stopped in front of Bernard.

“How to stop the old lady and get away with it? Why, by blaming somebody else, of course. When you heard the steps, you panicked and left the mop behind.”

All fit together, but it seemed that Bernard was not going down without kicking some more.

“A text message don’t prove shit, Dickfuss.”

“But your boots do. Look at the soles, they are covered with mud. It has not rained in a while and there is no mud outside. When you used the mop, you must have stepped on the water. The dirt of the field plus the water destroyed your alibi.

Wally was close to Bernard’s face. Bernard looked small compared to Wally.

“Unless you have a better alibi, prove me wrong.”

Bernard was finally busted.

          



It was not long enough for Ms. Lorian to wake up. We told her everything that had happened when she was unconscious. She thanked Gordon for helping her get to the teacher’s lounge. Gordon had finally stood up for himself, for once, and although I think it was going to be a once in a lifetime thing, I had some new found respect for him.

Bernard and Cindi were not so lucky. They died soon after. Sorry, could not resist, but they did get  what they deserved. Cindi was suspended for smoking in school property apart from the detention she already had. Bernard was finally expelled. He was lucky Ms. Lorian did not press charges, though. I guess most teachers think kids deserve a second chance.

As for me, I was still Ms. Lorian’s assistant. I would see Wally, as usual, reading some of his books. He seemed to be more open now, as he would start some conversations often. Most chat were still about his books.

“You know, this story was very interesting, Rudy.”

“Really, what’s it about?”

“Rudy, you need to read it to find out.” Wally set the book and grabbed another from his backpack. “Now, onto my next adventure.”