OK! So I listen, to all you have to say “Can you fix the socket...Mothers coming today?” Yeah! Sure...It’s not like I have to go to work Whatever you want babe! Man I’m a jerk Here’s a little list of the things you say The entirety of just one single day:- -can you pick some milk from the corner shop? -can you make a wedge? The door won’t stop -can you pick up the kids? I’m going for a wax -watch them for a second, so I can relax -did you move my bag? I’m sure I left it there! -why do you ignore me? It’s as if you don’t care -what time will you be back so I can cook tea -babe! I’m so fat, why do you love me? -does my ass look big, not sure about this dress (You could have decided that before I paid...pest) -not tonight honey, I have the worst headache -going to your mates? Again! For god sake. Listen here wise ass, you can stand and attack But who’s the one you run too, when you need to unload your sack? When you’re hungry? And need to fill your tummy Or need a lift to work, because you were drunk and spent your money Here’s my list for you, and the things which you require Or at least think you deserve, in your imaginary empire:- -hey babe! Could you cook me a medium steak? -sorry about that! I meant to pull out, my mistake! -could you get me a beer from the fridge baby! -pass the remote, I’m feeling a bit lazy -Fred’s coming over, we’re gonna watch the game -don’t touch the Harley! Damn girl, use your brain -do you like it when I do that? Does it feel good? -come here babe, let’s use this morning wood! -I’m not watching that, it’s a chick flick -that’s an impressive crap “babes come here quick” -I’m not going to your mom's, screw that she hates me -I’ll only put it in a little bit. Ready now? 1...2...3 But its ok I love you, warts and farts too So I’ll even love the bad times, and everything you do I love you too honey, whinge and moan alike That’s why I popped the question, and made you my wife!!! |