My Day Out

My Day Out

This is the fast train crossing the border,
Going South with Mr Duncan Lauder,
I’m his clerk and I’m going too,
We’re in first class on the 10:52.
We fly down Beattock towards Carlisle,
That great Border city which guards our Isle.

We get free coffee and a copy of The Times,
He tackles the crossword and I tweak my rhymes,
At Oxenholme we pause to check,
21 down...Oh what the heck!
The clues are cryptic and I’m undone,
Cos I can’t recall the name of a gun?
It’s called a musket Mr Lauder says,
As I peer out the window into the haze.
Not for us, the sights of THAT poem,
It’s far too misty, just like the gloaming!

We have left fair Scotland and its hills and farms and forests,
We are now in the Northwest of England with Cities and factories...

At one O clock we run down from the Lakes,
Past Lancaster of red rose fame,
We have our lunch and enjoy some cakes,
As we speed on over the River Lune.

I’ve seen white lambs, newly born,
Looking for succour, looking forlorn,
It’s spring down here, I sense as we pass,
Over canals and rivers and goats eating grass.

A glimpse of the sea and Blackpool Tower,
And Wigan pier as we go lower and lower,
Towards England’s heart and industrial core,
Where the revolution started in days of yore!

After our lunch it’s time to work,
Old Lauder’s a stickler for that!
So I check the bundles to earn my perk,
As he sleeps, to relieve his gout!

Bundles of files, bundles in piles,
Bundles in order for our Mr Lauder,
Tied up with ribbon and tiny wee bows
The contents of which only Old Lauder knows,
I sort out the notes, which only shows
This jaunt is having its highs and its lows
And while I work on, my boss has a doze,
Notes about this and notes about that,
Notes about murder and a victim’s hat,
Files on crime and bodies in lime,
Files on death that take my breath,
Bundles of stuff about crimes of love,
And Internet fraud both here and abroad,
Some are typed and some handwritten,
It’s all cool stuff and I’m really smitten,
And glad I chose a career in Law,
Which I only did to please my Ma,
Cos she’s a legal eagle too,
A real high flyer and one of the few,
Who suits her wig and gown in court,
Although the Botox helps to keep her skin taut,
I know I’ll pay, for that last line,
If she ever reads, My Day Out in rhyme!

And so...At last we arrive in Bath,
A roman city, but I fear,
I’m going to incur my boss’s wrath,
If I don’t leave this and get my butt in gear!


Written as part of my Blog 26th February 2009