An Ode To Father

I remember a time, when we would laugh and play.
A time when you were happy, to treat me like a daughter everyday.
I know that mom was too far along, and now I'm living instead of dead.
I know that you could of used the money to go to school instead.
But just to let you know, I think of you all the time.
I wonder if I ever made you proud or if you ever miss me at all.
I guess that I ruined your life and I'm to blame for the fall.
You are not the dad that I had once before
I never wanted to be so far apart
But you are the one who closed the door
And broke your daughters heart.
And what about the savings, the ones you had for me for school.
I guess those disappeared, after you and mom weren't cool.
You're mad cause I owe an old friend money, but if you really cared,
You could of quit drinking for a month, and took time to be there.
But you weren't there, when I needed you the most.
And yet you blame it all on me, you treat me like a ghost.
You're also mad because I picked someone else over you.
I'm growing up dad, it's what I'm suppose to do.
I cry over you, more often then you know.
And I cry even harder, every time that I'm alone.
The saddest part is, I don't even have a picture of us, unless I sign online.
It would be really nice, If I had one to look at anytime.
One day, I'll pay it back, give you some cash for the movie I've never seen.
And even though it's going to hurt, I still don't think you should talk to me.
You can delete from your life so easily, just because of something like money.
I thought love and friendships, meant more than that ever could,
But I guess it doesn't matter, I still feel they should.
I'll never forget, the good times that we shared.
Even though they were so long ago,
At a time when you still cared...