Don't Determain My Sisters Death

        There are tubes everywhere I am confused and scared. They say she won’t live. There is blood traveling through the tubs and other secretions I have yet to learn about. I am only 19 she is only 18 live wasn't supposed to be like this. We had our whole lives ahead of us dreams to come true, but now what has happened. When we were little we used to say that we would always live together. She liked cats and I liked dogs we wanted a house made to look like half cat and half dog. We were childish we shared all of our dreams and feeling and emotions we were sisters; we were and still are best friends. The night of November 16, 2005 both of our lives around us changed for good. On a rainy night my sister was speeding and had some to drink as well as talking on a cell phone. She was crying and all of a sudden she lost control of her car and went head on into a tree. Thankfully there was a young man who drove by seconds after the crash and pulled her out the smoking car seconds away from bursting in flames. She was rushed to Yale New Haven Hospital where she went under four operations in less than five hours. The police came to my house, my sister was driving my car and the assumed it was I in the car accident. They came to say that Lorraine was in an accident, when I was in bed sleeping. My mother came and woke me up and said your sister Kim has been in serious accident. At one in the morning I jumped out of bed and my mother drove me to the hospital at this point we knew nothing. She had lacerated her liver and had traumatic brain injury and the said she wouldn't make it the night. I remember saying it was going to be OK. I know my sister, we shared everything together; she was a fighter after all she was my best friend she couldn't die especially without me. They put us in a room with the doctors and we had to make a decision if we were going to pull the plug or not. We didn't pull the plug it hadn't even been 24 hours. I couldn't cry I had no tears to cry I was scared I was shocked and I just believed she was going to survive. Around ten o'clock that morning I called my brother to let him know what had happened, when he cried I knew it was ok for me to cry. My sister spend a little over a month in a coma and slowly she started to come back to live. She has under gone 40 operations and sadly she has lost her right leg. She lives her live with an ostemy bag that hopefully soon will be reversed. She has a few more operations she has no skull on the right side of her skull that needs to be put back in. her leg needs to be operated on again and her stomach needs to get healed and the OSTEMY bad needs to be reversed which will be awhile. We live our life different now we still have dreams that are put on hold because she still has more operations and infection is a hard thing right now. We have to make sure she doesn't fall or is left alone. She is my best friend my baby sister and no matter what ever happens she will continue to be my biggest fan. Someone who can go through that and still have a sense of humor and can grow from this experience that's what my hero is. She's everything she's strong willed and if she wants it we all know now she will fight for it.  One day our dreams will come true and we may have grown up a bit we may not live in the little house like a cat and dog and our feelings and emotions and dreams have changed a lot. She is my life she does everything I wish I could do. She wants to go back to college and be a new person she tries everyday to make use of herself. She is only 19 it has been 11 months since the accident and she can walk, talk, and get around without the use of a rehab facility. There are days when it gets really hard but I am lucky to know my best friend is still alive and those days no longer seem so hard or unbearable. I have to put myself in her shoes. Learning how to walk and live your live with a prosthetic leg and no mobility of your right arm and not being able to dress in short shirts or swim or go to the beach is hard specially when your 19 years old.  I wouldn't change my life for anything though my sister has taught me to be a strong person and if you just believe in something it truly will happen. My life was put on hold for a long time but now I know she will be ok and we can dream our dreams.