The Fillmore Ch 10

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NM

Chapter 10
         Zoey’s dreams that night were a jumbled mess of images. She sat quietly on the living room couch, wearing her best and only dress. She had showered, and she her hair was damp, but combed and pulled back from her face. Her father had invited the neighbor lady, who she now knew as Selene, to dinner at their house.
         Then, Zoey’s father opened the front door, and there she was. Selene was tall and slender, and the long billowy dress she wore added to the image. Her auburn hair hung in a cloud around her face and shoulders, making it seem like she glowed when the light shined on it. In front of Selene, and to her right, stood Sissy. The ten year old girl was slight, like her mother, but her golden hair hung down straight, just brushing her chin. Her pretty blue eyes looked around at Zoey, and she waved. Zoey gave her a small wave back, but stayed where she was.
         Next, she watched in horror as the ensuing conversation unfolded from her memories. She saw Selene tell her father she had been diagnosed with leukemia and that the doctor’s didn’t think she would live through the year. She remembered the horror and sadness that something so horrible could happen to such a kind woman. That very woman begged with her father to take her daughter, Priscilla, after she passed away. She thought it would be easiest on Sissy if she could stay with Zoey. She remembered the burning in her chest and head as she struggled to refrain from bursting out with a warning to Selene, to take Sissy, and get her away from the evil man seated next to her. She kept her mouth shut though, too afraid of what he would do to her if she didn’t. The thought of him touching her skin repulsed her and made her shiver. Her heart broke when her father agreed to take Sissy in. The poor little girl didn’t deserve to lose her mommy and gain Zoey’s father. She was a good girl, and didn’t deserve what would happen to her under his care.
         Her dream jumped to much later in time. She was standing next to Selene’s grave, at her funeral. Sissy was gripping her hand like she’d fall into oblivion if she let go. Zoey held her as she cried for her lost mother, and the little girl calmed in her arms. She jumped to a time even later, holding Sissy in her arms, rubbing the bruises on her arms to make the knots go away. Another image, taking the blame for a glass Sissy broke, taking the belt so Sissy wouldn’t have to feel it. Again, holding Sissy and rocking her until her cries quieted and she fell asleep. Her mind lingered on this image, watching Sissy sleep, so peaceful and innocent. Then the dream took on an even darker tone, if that were possible.
         She watched as Sissy poured a cup of coffee, placing exactly two spoonfuls of creamer and one packet of sugar in it. She stirred it three times, as she knew he liked his coffee. At first, it was just like any other morning, as this was Sissy’s job every single day before he left for work. But then Zoey noticed the yellow dress she wore. It had white lace across the top, and the sleeves puffed up around her shoulders. The belt around her middle was tied with a bow at her lower back, and her golden yellow hair was done in two braids that hung down over either shoulder.
         Zoey watched in apprehension as Sissy approached her father with the cup of scalding coffee. She knew what was coming, but she was utterly powerless to stop it, just like the day it happened. Sissy came up from behind him, on his right, extending the cup to hand it to him. Just then, he turned, his elbow knocking into the cup and splashing the hot liquid down his leg. He bellowed out in pain and grabbed Sissy by the front of her dress.
         The images of her dream become chaotic again, as she saw him lift Sissy by her dress and throw her across the arm of the couch. She stepped forward as he pulled his belt from the loops of his pants, trying desperately to think of a way to turn his attention away from Sissy and onto her. He responded by hitting her across the cheek with the folded belt. She fell to the ground, grabbing at the belt and pulling it from his hands. An image of her father standing over Sissy, his pants around his ankles and her beautiful hair wrapped around his left fist, flashed across her mind then. Another, this time of her cowering against the wall with his belt clutched in her hands, watching as he ruined the only person who had ever loved her. Sissy had screamed at first, but he’d just ripped the  belt from her dress and shoved it into her mouth.
         Everything faded for a second, then Zoey was confronted with another image. This time, Sissy lay across the arm of the couch, not moving, as blood dripped down her thighs. Her father was gone, left for work, so Zoey ran to her, pushing her hair back from her face and wiping the tears away. Sissy wasn’t responding though, so Zoey started to shake her, but she just slid to the floor, not breathing.

         Zoey sat bolt upright in her bed, a scream falling from her lips for several seconds. She shoved the hands away from her body and scooted across the bed, cowering in the corner and whimpering. A familiar voice started nagging at her consciousness, but her terror blotted it out for a second.
         “Zoey? Zoey, wake up!” Alyssa insisted. Zoey suddenly realized where she was and launched herself into Alyssa’s arms again. She sobbed as the other girl rocked her back and forth, making hushing noises and stroking her hair.
         “Are you okay honey?” Zoey just sobbed harder, unable to get a deep breath or stop crying. “I’m going to get Claire, Zoey, this isn’t normal.”
         “No! Don’t leave me, plee-ease” she cried out.
         “I wont, honey, I don’t have to leave to call Claire.” She closed her eyes then, as if she were concentrating. A few moments later, she resumed her shushing noises. By the time Claire arrived and strode across the room, Zoey’s sobs had quieted. Judging from the look in her eyes, Claire knew the turmoil in her soul had not.
         “Zoey, what happened?” A few fresh tears splashed down her cheeks, and she looked at Claire with haunted eyes. She felt as if waves of despair and anger were washing against over her body, again and again. It was as if she were drowning in a sea of emotional pain, and there was no hope of ever breaking the surface again.
         “I watched him kill her…” she barely whispered.
         “Who?” Claire’s many years of experience had kicked in at those words, and if Zoey was manifesting a Prophecy Ability, she had to find out as quickly as possible to prevent a murder.          
         “Sissy….my father,” she responded after a moment. Claire stared at her for a second. She had been thinking about this moment since the first time she heard the girl’s name. Turning over how to approach the topic, deciding what words would sooth her mind, that moment was suddenly right in front of her face, and it still took a moment to sink in.
         “What happened?” Her words instinctively dropped into her soft, soothing counselor voice. Zoey suddenly felt as if every breath she took stilled the waves of sorrow a little bit each time. Her thoughts began to organize themselves, and her breathing slowed. She was no longer having trouble differentiating dream from reality, but she was still in terrible pain. Memories that she had repressed for six years had just been ripped from her mind and paraded in front of her.
         Zoey began speaking in a monotone voice that frightened Claire. There was no emotion in it at all. She recounted the events leading up to Sissy’s death in that haunting tone, but when it came to the act itself, she seemed to choke on the words.
         “He-he had her hair wrapped around his hand. And it- it was so wrong, him standing over her like that…and then he was gone, and he just left like nothing happened, but she wouldn’t get up and- and- she was dead.” Her sobs returned at this point, and she pressed her face back into Alyssa’s shoulder. Some distant part of her mind recognized the reversal of roles as she gripped her friend like a life line.
         “Zoey…you know the things that happened to you and Sissy were not your fault. You acknowledged that with Alyssa and I yesterday, it was  not your fault. You know you had no power over what your father subjected you to.” She paused, making sure the words sank in, and then continued. “You are a strong, kind woman. You did everything you could to stop him from hurting Sissy. But he was not stronger than you, you are the one that endured your life and came out of it the better person. Sissy may not have made it, but it was not because of anything you did or not do. Sissy’s life ended because of the illness of your father’s mind.”
         “You don’t understand, I could have stopped him. I was too scared, I should have tried harder, I should have protected her!” She sat up, looking at Claire head on. The sadness in her eyes was quickly being replaced by flames of anger, and Claire knew she had to diffuse the situation before it accelerated.
         “Zoey, you were twelve years old. There is no way you could have stood up to a grown man, especially one in a psychotic rage. He made the choice to do what he did to that little girl, and there was no stopping him. It was not your fault. The emotion suddenly faded from Zoey’s face as Claire spoke. It was as if she had been resisting the truth of her words and had finally given up.
         “She’s right, you know,” Alyssa spoke up. “You did what he didn’t, you cared about her, and you should continue to care about her. But, her memory should be a good one. I’m sure she would want you to look back and remember your days with her as good ones. Remember her, but think of the good times, not the bad. It is wrong what happened, but your father is the one that should feel the guilt for it, not you. The only way that is going to happen is by you showing him that he couldn’t break you. You have to show him a proud, strong woman, and make him feel the guilt for Sissy’s death.” Alyssa looked her in the eyes, and she saw so much love and compassion in them, that she nearly gasped. Instead of responding, she simply poured just as much emotion into her own gaze as she stared back at Alyssa. After a short time, both girls smiled and hugged each other tight.
         “Thank you for being there for me Alyssa, and you too Claire. You guys have got to be the most empathetic people I’ve ever known…not that I’ve known many, but I can’t see many measuring up to you two. Anyway, I hear what you guys are saying, but…it’s easier said than done. But I will take your words to heart, and I will try to remember the good times. It’s kind of like with my mom, huh Claire?”
         “Yes, she should be a source of strength for you Zoey, draw on her love to help you be a great person.” Claire smiled brilliantly at Zoey. The girl was incredibly receptive to the therapy, it seemed all that she needed was someone to care about her.
         “Exactly, so I want to keep her close to my heart, not push her into my memories and blame myself for things I couldn’t change. Same with Selene, I loved her, and I know she loved me.” She soon launched into the story of the first time she ever saw Sissy, the day she gave her the doll. She recalled how beautiful they both looked, and how happy and peaceful they were. She left out the part where her father later found the doll, choosing to just relive the short, wonderful encounter.
         After awhile, Claire said her goodnight and made Zoey promise to call if she needed her any further, regardless of the time. Zoey continued to tell Alyssa about little moments with Sissy, times the girls would laugh and laugh together, when her father was out. Alyssa never grew bored of sharing these memories, nor did she feel any jealousy toward the girl who obviously Zoey’s closest and dearest friend. She simply shared Zoey’s happiness and memories until both were too tired to keep their eyes open.