Arnold the Talking Muffin

"Please! Don't eat me!" cried Arnold the rare talking muffin. Bob the policeman was about to eat the muffin when it screamed in despair. Bob leaped into the backseat and curled up in a ball.

"You can talk!" Bob yelled as a passerby stopped to peer into the police car to watch the spectacle.

"DUH!!!! Who else would've talked to you?!" Arnold shrieked.
"Hey!" the policeman said, "Lots of people talk to me!"
"Yeah right!" the muffin exclaimed, "I bet that more people talk to a muffin then they do to you! Oh wait, I am a muffin! Hahaha! I made a joke! Haha!" giggled the loud, obnoxious muffin.
"That's it! You're going to jail!" yelled the policeman.
"What for?!" the muffin cried.
"For being rude to a man of authority." huffed the angry policeman, as he puffed up his chest.
"NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!" screamed Arnold.
"Hey look! It's the man talking to a muffin!" laughed some teenage hooligans that were walking by.
"Hahaha!" giggled the muffin who continuously roared with maniacal laughter.
"Shut up!" yelled the policeman as he stuffed he whole muffin in his mouth.