One Pet Mule

When I was ten
I loved to play
In-genius pranks
Most every day

I'd walk my mule
Down to the square
On somber days
Of Sunday prayer

My mule did drop
A load or two
And one was on
The pastor's shoe

He took a swing
At Bessie Blue
(My mule's full name
I thought you knew)

But Bessie ducked
The pastor missed
And tripped beneath
Her as she pissed

He threw his shoes
I think at me
But weighted down
With shit you see

They fell far short
Of me and Bess
And pastor Pete
Was one wet mess

And I began
To laugh out loud
Infecting then
The whole damn crowd

Who held it in
As farts slipped out
And with each fart
Someone would shout

"Hey pastor I
Can see your feet
Which now are bare
Good pastor Pete

And Bessie's piss
Has soaked you through
You best go home
And tend to you

'Cause soaked you are
From head to toe
But Pastor Pete
We loved the show

This service was
The best in years!"
Then laughter brought
The crowd to tears

As Pastor Pete
Stripped off his clothes
His "peter" Pete
Our pastor shows

Without the shame
I thought I'd see -
Just naked Pete
With peter free

The pastor now
Is selling cars
When he is not
Inside the bars

I guess he lost
The call to preach
But pastor Pete
Did surely teach

A boy of ten
A mule named Bess
A laughing crowd
With gas excess

How quickly life
Can take a hit
If one pet mule
Decides to shit