I Was a Rotten Kid!

Bad Things I Did as a Kid

1.           I dumped a coffee can full of ants into my big brother’s bed along with some sugar to keep them there.  Some of the ants traveled to my parents’  bedroom.  Ants apparently love perfume.  They were all over my mother’s dresser.

2.          I let all the mice for his genealogy experiment out of their cages. From then on (for years) we’d see white, black, grey and spotted mice running around the house and barn.

3.          I accidentally ran over one of the baby geese on my bike breaking its neck and killing it.

4.          Stole twenty bucks from my grandmother.

5.          Built a tiny fire in the lid of a mayonnaise jar up in the top of the barn full of hay. (SO got caught for that one!)

6.          Went exploring in the old iron mines (from the Revolutionary times and not used since) where we were absolutely not allowed to go.

7.          Ran away over the mountain with my dog, my diary and a pocketful of Smarties when I was ten.  Fell and broke my arm, found help and then told my dad I’d just gotten lost while hoping he hadn’t found the ‘I’m running away and never coming back’ note. (He had, but never said a word!)

8.          Went horseback riding on the mudflats with my hair loose and barefoot one March.  (None of which were allowed) and my horse fell through what I thought was solid ground and we were trapped in icy water, mud and gravel.  It took a dozen state troopers, a helicopter, a bottle of brandy and a trooper cutting off my waist-length hair with a penknife to get us out.

9.          I’d sneak my dad’s Playboy magazines down to my room and hide them under my mattress.  I once went to summer camp for two months forgetting to put them back.  Spent the summer worrying if they’d be found when my mom ‘cleaned’ my room while I was gone.

10.          Not exactly ‘bad’ but for twenty years I thought it was: Bringing my grandmother’s basset hound to her and sneaking her out of the nursing home so she could see her dog.  She died that night.


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