Flying like a chicken just takes gas

His name was Ralf, but his kin folk and most of his friend’s knowed him as Clevis.

One day while pondering on the meaning of life and the beginning of the cosmos, Clevis got himself an idea.
He needed a way to make himself some money so he could enjoy the finer things in life: a bath, a double wide that didn’t leak,  or even a new fine ride like his neighbor had.

He considered he must live in the richest part of the trailer park, his neighbor Billy Bob and his pretty wife Billy -Joe-Bob was always showing off  there  shinny new pre owned Pinto Wagon.  Sure rub that luxury car in my face he thought.

Clevis had known the good times before the rescission, heck he had one of the premiere jobs at the poultry plant. It wasn’t just anyone who was responsible for pressure washing the chicken skin parts out of the gut tanks.

That job was only fit for one man. That’s what his boss had told him when appointing him the promotion. Clevis was special.

No one in the entire county could continue to work in the Bi– Product –decontamination -zone  long  without developing some sort of incurable bird lung fungus, and a strange rash that seem to resemble some type of feather pattern.
These ailments never seemed to bother Clevis and he was happy as a pig in….. Well let’s just say he was happy: that is until the day of that unfortunate accident.

Ya-see one hot July day Clevis was way behind cleaning the gut tanks because he had wasted several hours trying to repair the pressure washer when a supervisor pointed out the obvious.  The unit was out of gas.

Well it was  obvious to everyone except Clevis .Did I mention that Clevis was special?

Now running behind as he was, he decided to skip his usual cigarette break and just grab a smoke wile he worked.

He new it was against the rules to smoke in the gut buster lane, but what could go wrong? 
After all he had a pressure washer and if a fire were to start up he could quickly put it out with his trusty # 8 true value wash master magnum hose.

Clevis had failed to consider one important fact before he lit that cigarette on that fateful day,.

Those gut tanks had been sitting and extra two hours in that hot July sun fermenting those left over chicken parts into something mighty powerful.

I believe the Fire Marshalls investigation stated it was Methane Gas.

I’m guessing you’re  a figuring what happen next? 

The explosion was heard near three counties away, it shook the entire plant so bad the hens in the egg producer coups lay three for one that afternoon. 

There were eye witness accounts from workers that swore they saw Clevis flying through the air covered in chicken beaks and feathers.

He was flapping his arms as if this new flying ability just came natural to him.

Some folks  said the flapping was Clevis trying to put out the flames that he was trailing.

People were so startled they thought it is one of them terrorist  attacks.  One account in the local news had it described as one of them new fangled drones the air force was testing.

There were several witnesses in town that said Clevis  flew clean over the Wall Mart, but there was a big debate weather that was true or not .

It seems the local grocer saw him first  ric-a-shay of the KFC billboard on highway 17 and that extra lift propelled him over the Wall Mart... .

The folks in town where judging his flight by NASCAR rules , and that extra bounce of the billboard equated to the same as illegal Pit-Stop so that group was not willing  to give Clevis the credit for a clean Wall Mart Fly-By.

To be continued, when Clevis is released from the hospital……………………….