Tragic Transformation

Giving up was not an option. To give up was to fail, and failing would never even glimpse the realms of thought. His name was Ignorance, and in himself he was bliss. To him the world was a simplistic equation of logic, and giving up was never a solution to an equation. Ignorance, even though was not sure of himself, as he turned a blind eye to his own problems, was quite keen and observant of the world around him. He could see the faults in others and well understood humanity. The key to this was what lay in a person’s eyes. You can tell a lot by someone’s eyes. Insecurities, depression, mischievous, even affection. Under those categories you can take it deeper and see things like, a rough home life, a death of a loved one, hatred for one’s self, and lust. The eyes are really a key to someone’s soul. Ignorance was trained well in these things, and was well aware that his 6th sense was well in tune. Being able to read people, and emotions around him, made it very easy for him to be a social genius and to control aspects in his life. He knew what others wanted to hear, what they needed to hear, and when to fold and walk away. Logically, life was a simplistic mathematical equation. That was until Ignorance met up with Manipulation. Manipulation was beautiful. Her eyes we’re the first pair he could not fully understand. They held mystery. Something was so seductive about her gaze that it made Ignorance crave to know what stories lay behind them. What truths could be found, and what kind of equation she had figured out. When logic was put to the test about Manipulation, Ignorance could not find any equation to fit her. It was the first time Ignorance had no answer to the feeling had presented itself. Ignorance was infatuated with Manipulation. He had never met such a fierce gaze with which he had no understand or knowledge about. In his books of experience this feeling was even new. It was the first time Ignorance felt true love. Eventually Ignorance and Manipulation began their wooing of one another in a blissful tornado of emotion. Birds sang everyday when Ignorance woke up, and songs played in his head that he had no names for. This truly was a gift from the gods. But as time went on Ignorance began to see things from Manipulation that worried him. Manipulation had a rough past with family, and had a history that wasn’t the nicest of ones. None the less these warning signs could be taken down and with them new beautiful paintings could replace them. He knew he could fix these. However as time played its role, Manipulation really began to hurt Ignorance. She told him things that cut like knives into the depths of his heart. The heart that he had opened up fully to her, and allowed her to know all his secrets. Ignorance put his full trust in Manipulation and gave her his mind, soul, and heart. Infatuation became a deep love, a love so strong that she was first on his list above all else. But the hurt that came from Manipulation did not fit the equation Ignorance knew as love. For the first time in his life, Ignorance was really sad and afraid. He felt broken, drained, and abused. He chased and chased after Manipulation. There was no cost for Manipulation that Ignorance would not pay. There was no feat to great that Ignorance would not try to do for Manipulation. Each day Manipulation was the one thing that Ignorance loved to look forward to and longed to wrap his arms around. He loved when his lips tasted the soft tender skin of Manipulation. She became a part of Ignorance. Ignorance changed and became, Addiction. Addiction never wanted to give up on her no matter how much pain was caused. He had been pounded into the ground, called names he had never even known, had been ignored and abandoned. But Addiction figured it must have been his fault and stood in front of the mirror wondering how to fix it. But it was all alright, because Addiction loved Manipulation, and could only hope that Manipulation would someday see it the way he did. Addiction began to do anything he could for Manipulation. Sacrificed everything he had for just one more ounce of that drug known as, love. But as Addiction got deeper he was no longer feeling accepted. He felt that the ground he walked on was made of eggs. He loved going and seeing Manipulation but when he wanted to go somewhere else, even if she said that was fine, he always got this sense that Manipulation was upset. He hated making Manipulation upset. He was afraid of the words that would come out of his mouth that they might upset Manipulation. He liked the moments when things were happy with Manipulation, and did not want to complicate things further. But as more and more of this came onto Addiction, he always felt stressed, tired, anxious, and even depressed. He trusted Manipulation but yet wasn’t sure because of how she was very indecisive. Addiction couldn’t take the neglect, the pain, the hurt of words, the lack of attention and the empty love he was getting. Addiction began to give up, something he never did. He told Manipulation truth about the things he did because he thought it might be separating them, he made his rights with God and involved Him with his relationship. These things seemed to help after his euphoric dose of tears. However the stomach aches of his intuition warning him got stronger. Addiction tried everything he could. He told Manipulation he didn’t know if he could do this. Manipulation turned from Manipulation into Sincerity. She apologized for all the ways she had acted and realized what she had done. Addiction could not believe it. Sincerity turned into what he wanted her to become for so long. But when she became Sincerity, old memories, things he wished he had said, things never said, all the pain he had put into a suppressed box, sprung open and out popped out jack. Addiction did not know how to accept Sincerity. He waited for so long and when it came it was left with “what now?” Sincerity begged for him to love her, wanted Addiction to know how sorry she was, and how much she truly loved him. He realized before all that that Sincerity had known her actions, and that when he was in love, he was just an option to her. He did not know what to do. For once in his life, no equation, no experience, no knowledge was there. For once he was in no man’s land. He had never been there before. He tried to give it a shot again, but it all came crumbling down on his head, and he had to walk away. Sincerity did not understand, and maybe never will. She expected Addiction would come back. She told people he was under control and would come back. Except this time, he had no choice but to not look back. Addiction turned into Sadness. People known as Hypocrite began to judge Sadness. They said it was because of his actions that they did not work out. But his actions were not the cause of the problem, but a problem from the initial cause. Sadness just needed more love, more attention, more hugs and kisses instead of stings from sharp lips. But Sadness did not blame Sincerity because he knew he had no choice. He wanted to love Sincerity so badly but he knew it would kill him. Friends came to pick Sadness up, they we’re called Brothers. Sadness went to a man named, Guide, and he said the amount of time he had spent watching Sadness in tears and in stress was killing him, and he would never be happy if he stayed there. Sadness made his decision. Sincerity turned into something that Sadness could find no name for, and still cannot. Her actions and her choices surprised him, and he had no name for her to fit into. Sadness finally turned into Acceptance. But Acceptance has been slipping in and out of depression and questionable trances. Brothers, and Guide, continually helped and help Acceptance. Finally Acceptance looked into the mirror and watched it shatter. All his soul, mind, and heart he put into Unknown, fell apart. His personality that was one with Unknown fell apart. He bent over to pick up the pieces and put himself back together, but his hands were cut. It was time to build a new image, and that image bred Determination. Taking the lessons he learned, the pain, the hurt, the misunderstandings, the unfulfilled questions, and consumed them. Determination grew and turned into Soldier. He stands on his one crutch, still leaning on Brothers and Guide. But soon he will recover and he will be stronger for it. Soldier loved Unknown, still loves Unknown, but can never love her like he did. It would crush him. Soldier will not give up, and will never stop fighting to be better. Soldier realizes life is a battlefield and love is the minefield. Soldier salutes and says goodbye as Gentleman will present himself again. Unknown will make a great woman for someone some day. She will be full and become Sincerity to he who deserves it. Gentleman does not blame Unknown, because it takes two to tango and two to call it quits. Gentlemen accepts his ignorance, his time as soldier, keeps his determination, loves his brothers, and his guide, and realizes that sadness will come always and that addiction can be broken. Out of this shell breaks Me, and Me will always love You. Me is weak right now and terrified because his land is a place he has never been. But Me is limping forward and eventually his weak knees will birth to wings, and those wings will let him soar. You can walk whatever road you wish, and any path you must. Just do it for right and just causes. Do not seek quick escapes and empty acceptance. Me has always accepted you but Me cannot be what you want. Me watched as You disappeared into a memory. Me will be better and find his true self soon. Out there somewhere there is Deep Love, and Deep Love plus Me will equal happy after. Goodbye You, Me will always remember you and thanks you for what ever happened for it made me, Me.