The Buzzing of an Over Analytical Brain

Hunted Fairytale

Give me the answers, give me a smile
I know I havent spoken in a while
My voice is mute, my brain is numb
Just wish I had a nutcracker
Break it all wide open--expose the inside
Let’s take truth for a ride

No more demons hiding in my sleep
For its only dreams, they try and keep
And if the dreams arent real-the pain I wouldn’t feel
Then why I wonder--do I feel sweat and breathe
Without breath--When I awake cold and unknowing
In the middle of the night
When the moment between reality and dream is uncertain
And convincing yourself doesn’t make the horror go away

Why does the mind take us there -- If there is nothing to fear?
Maybe there is more reality in our nightmares
Than in our waking lives. Maybe if we focused
On the message sent and listen to the demons
That cause and prevent our tears--then maybe
We could solve the problems that have haunted us all these years.

Take me to the window, let me see outside
Jump past the wild thing and take me for a ride
From me to us and back to you
Nobodies sure who is who
I just keep writing--not sure how to stop
I think I like it better on top

Rhyming brain--quickly teasing--
-----we’re all insane
Where is this going and when will it stop--
My thoughts are pleading, yet not escaping--
At leaste not decoded
Only coded thoughts breathe through evil screams
And I have caught you unaware

The disease that plagues does not take you from within
It takes you from out here, right here
This is ware it all begins--Do you believe in original sin
In this world that we are in?
Who are you and do you know me
Do I even know myself? A pupil in this huge
New World of Thought---age is upon me, though I’m just a
Child, a baby in the whole of things.

Adventure--No. Now I’m slowing down.
My anxiety stetching, like humidity on the bathroom mirror
Look away--what do you see? A Fog, a haze, a mystery?.
Wipe away the sweat upon the glass--still time has not really passed-
We all come and go--not just through life and death, but through pain
And regret--Find and forget. Wipe away and concentrate--how long
Can the little girl inside there wait? Do not hesitate, turn the shower
Back on , into the depths of the mirror she will drawn--not to be
Found--not to be found…
Do you know what this mind thinks?
Do you know why I…Why I think so much?
It’s like fire in search-- of life---of one desire to fulfill
One need--to answer one question --to make more questions…
To ask, to wonder---to breathe in that which is not explained-
To pretend to make believe, in hope of finding more truth on
The side where no-one looks

The Falsities--I believe they lead to our realities…
Alice in Wonderland. So close your eyes and slip on
The glass slipper. The highway to our dreams. Fight
The powdered demon, the lifeless slut--Run to Jack
The beanstalk’s down and I need a way out of Fairytown.
It’s a Neverending Story, Cinderella don’t you worry
Your Princ isn’t coming, but your life will unfold
You are the victim of societal Greed, You are an example--
On you we must Feed. So rise above your Prince--
We don’t need another Snow White. So slap the bitch
And kill the witch and come on a Quest with me
Cant you see?--we’re melding truth with Fantasy.

My mind is aching, my thoughts are baking
And here we go again.


Next:

Time a Blushing Crusader


Time a blushing crusader, masked by the routine, the daily rituals of life--that get us sucked up in the mundane. Contentment an eager less word-- our muse(or lack of) that serenades us in the comfort of routine-in the always instead of the maybe--lacking risk and blind to the extreme. Ignorant of both misery and bliss and without such-wrapped(in a black and white world - grey) safely inside the box. Why is it that people no longer dream, no longer risk--no longer set themselves on the edge -terrified of the sea of vulnerability --too afraid of the undertow and even more so the aftermath that is left?. 'Better to have loved and lost,' no longer holds truth or weight--but rather sinks -that anchor holds us steadfast to this black and white world. Too many of us have become tamed and leashed--caught in a our sedentary playgrounds --where the sea-saw no longer rises up--but remains grounded- never to view the what else--the could bees’ --the would bee’s--if only we weren't so afraid--of what? Afraid that we may fail--or better yet that we may succeed--therefore held hostage to that success and again living in the constant fear that you may fall. Yet passed the fear or because of it we are now blinded monkeys without a grasp-- without the knowledge of another realm that calls for our existence. Yet our entity is leashed --unable to breath--barricaded we know not of the freedom that belongs to us. We stay tackled by societal regress and hold tight to our inhalers- the crutch, the excuse that is never called for, yet used anyways and always. I too, a hypocrite, am tangled by the strings that guide my malpracticed life. The lawsuit --is that I’m not blind nor ignorant and therefore have no excuse --yet I too--am tired---bogge d down -I often beg for sleep -to disappear into the subtle ignorance of blinded naiveté--to pretend I know not --yet still I’m constantly chastised in my knowing--ironic--sadistic temperance--so again I fall way to midnight temptation that regimented circle-no-square that I map out only to bang against the angles of my own dismay.
Why can we not break through the maze of utter discontentment - instead we remain in the spoils of our rotting potential.
The time is now-we can no longer hide in that cloud of numb procrastination. Live in the now--believe in yourself. Time is passing and the years seem to be in fast-forward the older we get--we are no longer able to press pause-- the moments gone--are now -the fuel for new moments--soon to be our history---make it count--let our regrets be no more and only learn from our failures-after all we are


Next:



Tired--tired from acting
Playing the role in this charade
Fanciful- the hope --T
The calloused mirage--
Only hoped would sabotage--
The truth from creeping
And cracking this facade --

Yet steadfast it holds
Not truth --but rather
An empty visage
A portrait contained
To still the shadows
Seeping through the veins --

Broader sholders, standing strong--
Intimidation still would break
Tradin truth for the dawn
The endless supper that never eats--
The broken promises that yesterday repeats
And to escape--will leave you single-
Signaled out- -afraid, alone--
In deep waters of clarity
You shiver from the cold--

The belonging you traded
To liove in a cage--
The immortal regret
Of the passed you allowed
And can not 4get
It comes in with the crowd
To satiate your tired longing-
And in your fear -- proud--
You have no-one to blame--
You new the consequences
When you strted the game--
Even ifyou in ur ignorance
We allow a pause a hicup--
Another chance experience
Ur bath, your first romance--
U tossed dwn the ax
And the battle too soon
You surrendered and lost--
Easier, my friend
To play on the road-- a dead end
Safe in your shoebox castle
And the moat you self made-
Trader to the country--
As king you betrayed your soul--
And all 4 what-?
To test --to taste-
The sugar of the beast ---
And to condemn it’s presence
By setting its time--
Control, my dear monarch-
Was your true defeat--
There ’s just some horns
That wont retreat--

Don’t you know--can’t you see
(How blind you have become)
You had already lost
Way be4 the thought occurred
That you could win--
You were different--
A solid mascot in the wind trade--
Ironic this temptress--
The same ---
That first made you afraid
The same that you and desire
That you act iout n rage-- --so I could live to surpass ---the