A grandmothers anguish with CT. DCF

    I was only 35 years old when I became a grandmother to my 1st grandchild. Wow, what joy I felt to hold her in my arms for the first time.The one thing that I didn't imagine in my younger years is that I would actually be a grandmother some day. I really don't think anyone does for that matter. She was my pride and joy.She was born into a family who has 69 family members living in her hometown. So she is loved by many!
My parents had 9 children and it exploded into 71 family members who are all still close to one another. This needs to be stressed because i want  you to be aware of how many family members DCF could have contacted if they wanted too. But they didn't in the case of my 5 grandchildren. My oldest daughter and I have always lived together as a family unit. And so with that being said, the grandchildren couldn't stay with me.And that was so devastating to me, for the first time in my mothering I wasn't able to help or protect my family. That was a difficult emotion to deal with and I didn't for the longest time. I was forced to stand back and watch my grand children s  happy and silly natures slowly sucked out of them by DCF. They were broken down, traumatized, frightened, alone, without the love that they so much deserved, no hugs, no kisses, no I love you kisses at night,no sense of security, no hope, no future in their little minds, away from friends, attending new schools, strange beds, strange people, humiliated,embarrassed, confused.... and it goes on! Now tell me, how many of these emotions do we adults deal with everyday? We have the tools to cope, do these children understand how to cope or how to use these tools if given to them? DCF left my granddaughter high and dry.They didn't do what they promised that they would do for her. As far as they are concerned they are not making money off her anymore, so they don't have to help anymore, let the family deal with it now! Three out of my seven grandchildren at that time felt all those emotions within minutes after DCF barged into my family home, where i lived with my 87 year old father and three of my grandchildren. Here is one of the many examples i can write about FEAR that still is instilled in their little hearts after they are returned home. My 4 year old was returned home after she suffered abuse at the hands of her foster parents in New Haven .When her social worker, (who I am convinced she is the ONLY one working for the RIGHT reasons. Thank you Patti from the Torrington DCF office. She also had a tough battle trying to clean up Megan Hinchey's mess she made of my grand childrens case.) comes to do her twice a month visit, she starts to run the other way.I can only pray at that time" God, please comfort this child of yours and help her to feel safe again" . Never did I imagine that a child that young who is so dearly loved by this enormous family would be experiencing this FEAR.