Not done yet... no title yet.. just an idea. |
You think me to be mad, and perhaps I am, for such are the terrible vistas my eyes have beheld as to drive a man to madness. But if I am to be deemed mad, does not my tale hold even more importance, as to enlighten thee to my sad predicament? If you wish to deem me insane, then do as you must; lock me away in a refuge for the mentally unfit, contain me in a cage constructed to keep not the darkness out, but rather to conceal what mankind wishes not to see, and I shall bask in it's solace. Perhaps then the escape of sleep would finally return to me, and my mind would permit me to forget the things I have seen. I have no doubt that you will take my narrative as just insane ramblings, and I would not blame you if you did, for most men do not want to believe that their existence is a meaningless and as petty as I know it to be, nor do they want to believe that inhabiting the universe, and our world, is aeons old beings whose purposes far outlive our own, and whose knowledge extends from the known to the unknown, the finite to the infinite, from the worldly to the other-worldly. It was the summer of my youth, and having just turned eighteen, I decided I was now an old enough man to join a ships crew and head out to sea. Pride was in my Father's eyes as I boarded the tall wooden vessel, her magnificence bringing awe to my meager being. Never had I been outside the humbleness of my ancestral home, nor beyond the sanctity of our village, and looking back now, I realize how naïve and foolish I truly was. Though my eagerness to learn and explore the world had no bounds, I lacked wisdom, and knowledge. However, when I boarded her that day, my heart was aflutter in my chest with joy, and my curiosity was endless. The Elizabeth's Pride. To this day I remember every detail about her, from her mast, to her sails, to her carved angel on the front. I kissed my mother farewell, and comforted her that it wouldn't be too long until I was back home, safe and sound, and perhaps worldlier. She pulled me down to her, placing a golden amulet around my neck. “This,” She told me, “Belonged to your great great grandfather, who was a wise ship Captain, and now it belongs to you. May his wisdom guide your way until you are home again.” I waved to them from the deck of the ship, and I saw them continue to wave until we lost sight of the bright shore. The sky was a brilliant blue, and the ocean was calm, the waters as clear as crystal. The wind was gentle, and it blew in our sails a freshness. All at once I was overwhelmed with the feeling that this would be a wonderful adventure. How wrong I was. I curse the day I ever stepped foot aboard that damnable ship! If the knowledge I have now had been granted to me then, I never would have so much as gone to the docks that day, much less step aboard her. “Are ye Peter, lad?” I turned at the voice, finding myself face to face with an older man. He must have been in his early forties, for his hair was beginning to silver, and his face wore the lines of time. He towered over me, standing at least six and a half feet tall. His beard was untrimmed, and his muscles bulged from the arms of his shirt. I swallowed a breath of air, fright filling me as I reminded myself that I was a man now, and as such could not allow myself to be a coward. “Aye, sir, I am, and who may you be?” “My name is Isaiah. Now then, lad, why are you out here? You're just a child!” I squared my shoulders and held myself tall, spine stiffening, hoping that my false confidence was not easily seen through. “I happen to be eighteen years old, no child, I can assure you, and as for your decision to judge me as such, whether it be your place or not, I frankly do not care, for my desire is to learn, not to be told what I may or may not be.” Isaiah stared at me in stunned shock for a moment, before emitting a low chuckle, which turned to full laughter. He regarded me with a expression of mild amusement. “Well, forceful lad, too, aren't ya? You're more than welcome aboard my ship, but be warned, you'll be worked until you collapse into your bed from exhaustion at night, but ye will also gain the knowledge that only the sea can teach, and ye shall learn to respect her for what she is, beautiful, but deadly. She never stops, and she never sleeps.” I soon learnt what Captain Isaiah had meant by that. It was hard work we did, and the days were long with the time for sleep shorter each night, but it was all well. The Captain was a kind man, who took me under his wing, and for the next three months, I learned under him, and he taught me all he knew. At night we would sit in his cabin, and he would tell me of his many adventures, and of the perils of the sea. “Now listen, Peter,” He said. “And heed my words. The sea is a marvelous thing, full of wonders, but she has her secrets as well. There are things that lurk in these depths, far below mankind's reach, that far exceed all we know as reality. There are horrors the likes of which are unfathomable to the human mind, and are far from imaginable if we do not extend our thoughts beyond the barriers of our own realms. Time is nothing to her, lad. She does not change, yet does not stay the same. And her law is absolute.” I was frightened by the Captains words, and by the eerie, hushed silence that had fallen over the dim-lit, tiny room, which suddenly felt as if it did not contain enough air. He looked at me and laughed. “Now, now, boy, I thought you were brave? Ye have nothing to fear. To those who respect and understand her, she provides a quiet and peaceful sanctity where one's thoughts can be entirely free. Isn't that what ye came for?” He asked wisely, and it seemed as though his gaze pierced my very soul, for all at once I felt as if his dark eyes were staring right through me, searching for some mystical answer. “What do you mean, Captain?” I asked, and even then I still had not answered my own question. What had I come seeking?What had possessed me to leave my family and board this vessel heading to the unknown? As I look back on it now, I know. Deep down inside, the horrible truth possesses me, that I had known all along what we would find, and what we would see, even though I had no way of being sure, the deepest, darkest core of my being wanted adventure. “I'm not sure, Sir.” I admitted truthfully, averting my eyes to the ground. “I guess I wanted to see the world that was so vividly described in my books for myself. I crave knowledge, and I suppose I thought to myself that the best way to gain it would be to seek it out for myself.” When my eyes finally lifted, the Captain was smiling oddly at me. “That's what I was hoping you would say, lad.” He murmured. “Now we can start learning the important things.” I stared at him for a moment in blatant confusion. “What do you mean? I'm afraid I don't understand.” “That's exactly it, Peter. Ye don't understand... but ye will. I have seen many strange and unparallelled things on this ocean, some that yer mind could not even begin to grasp. Now for me to tell you about any of it, ye need to do something for me. I need ye to completely abandon anything ye have ever heard or learned. Can ye do that for me, lad?” I shifted uneasily in my seat, suddenly bitten by an icy cold despite the warm summer air. “I can try, Sir.” The Captain took a deep breath. “Are you sure you want to know, lad? Many men can't handle this kind of knowledge, and are eventually driven to the brinks of madness, where they cry out for mercy from the cosmos that allowed them this knowledge in the first place.” “The cosmos?” I inquired. Never before had I met someone who had mentioned the universe at all, much less using the term cosmos. It was then that I began to get a small inkling of idea that perhaps Captain Isaiah had far more knowledge than I had previously thought, and that I might have been too quick to judge him by his appearance, for while truly he was a frightful man to look at, his wisdom flowed like a never ending spring. The Captain nodded. “The Universe, lad. Some call it Fate, some call it Destiny. But at the end of the day, it's all the same.” “Do you not believe in God, Captain?” I questioned, surprised by the bitter, hollow laugh that tore itself from the Captain's throat. Never had I heard him sound that cold, and it shocked me into momentary complacency. Everyone I had ever met had been God fearing, and at the time I thought that was rightfully so, and as the Captain continued to speak, it sounded more and more like blasphemous venom to my ears. “Believing in God is a luxury that can not be afforded to the likes of me, Peter. Not that I could if I wanted to. Not with the knowledge I possess of the universe. I believe in the cosmos, lad, and in the ethereal. But don't fool yourself into believing the cosmos give one good goddamn about the needs and welfare of us, because in the grand scheme of things, our existence is unfathomably unimportant and menial, and there is far larger things going on than us.” Being in my shoes now, I of course realize the Captain was right, but being young, I was terribly frightened that perhaps I had joined the company of a crazed heathen, who was terribly mad, and possibly dangerous. “But that will be tomorrow night's story, lad. Go try and get some sleep. Morning comes early.” As I lay in my bed that night, tossing and turning frantically, I was filled with visions of monstrous beings, of a creature with tentacles and serpent-like bodies with a rattlesnake tail, with sharp claws protruding viciously from each black finger on the thick, dark hands, and five eyes glaring from the forehead. It whispered a name, and even the sound of it's voice was enough to curdle my stomach. Daemonog, it called, reaching out it's ugly hands towards me... I awoke in terror, sweat pouring from every crevice of my body, shaking violently. Never had I dreamed such as that before, and all I could envision was the creature reaching out for me... Despite being shaken, I was supposed to be a strong lad, and as such, I shook it off and went back to sleep. I did not know then, nor would I have understood, that the visions sent to me were not just dreams but rather visions of an ethereal being I had been able to glimpse while my mind was at it's freest state, where it could grasp things far greater than the conscious mind could bear without madness. Even now as I tell you of all this, I can hear it's voice as clearly as if it were the first time, and it is not without great fear that I continue my tale, for I hear it get closer all the time, and I know my time is short. The next day, I worked hard, and tried purely to focus on my task, and forget the image still so clearly burned into my brain. “Peter,” My crew-mate Scotty said as he put a hand on my back. “Slow down. Or you'll wear yourself thin.” It was not that I did not try to heed his advice. As I swabbed the filthy deck, I tried to relax, to listen to the sounds of the sea, but she seemed to only be mocking me, and her waves sounded frighteningly like menacing laughter. It was then that a soft noise began to flutter to my ears, musical and light. By God, someone was singing! I knew that it was none of the men, for this voice sounded womanly, like that of an angel. I looked out over the bow of the ship, and that's when my gaze fell upon her. She was sitting upon a high stone jutting out of the water, and as my eyes caught hers, she smiled at me. She dove into the water, swimming towards the ship, all the while singing her enchanting song. She soon anchored herself against the side of the ship. “Peter...” She crooned, and I recall being surprised that this woman knew my name. I recall very little after that, except that her voice was so angelic and she was just so beautiful.... As such I have none of my own knowledge to express, only what Captain Isaiah and the others told me. What they have recounted to me is that I began to lean over the edge of the ship, until they all but had to pull me in. “Are ye crazy, lad?” The Captain shouted as he dragged me to his cabin. Vaguely, I heard guns firing, and a distinct hissing noise from the direction of the woman. Slowly, I began to regain myself. “What do you mean? What happened, Sir?” I was bewildered, and rightfully so, for never before had such a thing as this happened to me. “A Siren, lad! And ye almost let yourself be dragged into depths by the damnable wretch! Vicious things they are, boy, and if ye let them, they'll drag ye in and eat ye live. Ye would not be the first of my men they've gotten to, either.” The whole ordeal had me dreadfully frightened, but it was an important lesson that I had to learn. The Captain was right. There were many things lurking just below the surface of the blackened depths of the abyss that I knew nothing of, and had yet to learn about. |