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Rated: ASR · Short Story · Other · #1832757
A girl spend the summer with her the Redneck side of her family.
Saturday, June 15th 2010
Facebook Statuses of Violet White
OK, so I've been here pretty much all day and I've learned the following
1) Don't talk fast
2) Don't drive slow
3) Don't get the above two mixed up
4) Always clean your plate

Fun fact: I held a roly-poly! (wishing I could post pictures)
-at Guest Bedroom
-posted at 10pm (four hours ago)
I saw her post at two am when i managed to sneak on the computer after everyone went to bed

Sunday June 16th 2010
It's true! everyone here is so nice and wavy. I mean they wave at me a lot.
-at Back of truck on way to Church
-posted at 8am (Three hours ago)
Checked her page at eleven when i got home from Church myself.

Monday June 17th 2010
5) Know what Chitlins are
(Def: the small intestines of PIGS prepared as FOOD!!)
6) Know when to say "Ma'am" and "Sir"
7) Know someone named Bubba
8) Call your sister "sister"
Fun fact o' the day: I had my first Moon pie!
-at Back of truck
-posted at 3pm (six hours ago)
Checked her page at nine right before bed.I don't understand how my mom still sends me to bed at NINE in SUMMER

Tuesday June 18th 2010
For my dim friends: DON'T use silverware with any of the following:
Ribs
Fried chicken
Watermelon
Corn on the cob
-at Bed
-posted at 10pm (ten hours ago)
Checked her page eight am when I got to the library on Wednesday.

Wednesday, June 19th 2010
For anyone who cares; USE silverware with the following:
Chicken fried steak and mashed potatoes (Yum!!)
Cheese pie
Grits
Pinto beans, cornbread, and sweet vidilia onions
-at Swimming Hole
-posted at noon (six hours ago)
checked at six while mom was making dinner and distracted by something

Thursday June 20th 2010
9) You must have at least ONE pickup truck in the immediate family
10) men sweat. Woman glow
11) never bend over without hiking your pants up first (this should be made the law!)
12) you must learn to say "ya'll" without feeling self-concious
-at swimming hole
-posted at noon (nine hours ago)
Checked at nine whilst going to bed. I so agree with the hiking pants up thing

Friday. June 21st 2010
Summer Solstice! Happy Summer folks!
13) Good food takes a while to fix (Tell that to my tummy)
14) You must always say the blessing before you begin the meal
15) Keep your elbows off the table (knew that from Grandma Anne)
16) Always refer to ladies as ladies.
I have fallen in love with biscuits
-at swimming hole
-posted at noon (six hours ago)
Checked before dinner. Now I'm jealous of her marv summer

Saturday, June 22nd 2010
I've been here a week! Man this is fun!
17) say "please" without fail (another tip o' the hat to Grandma Anne)
18) Take home a plate to whoever missed the potluck
19) Never drink the last Diet Coke (*Blush* Guilty)
NEVER FORGET BUG SPRAY
-at dinner
-posted at six (four hours ago)
checked at ten before bed! Mom's let me stay up! I second the bug spray

Sunday, June 23rd 2010
I have learned how to thump a watermelon. Google it people.
-At water hole
-posted at noon (11 hours ago)
Guess who had to check this after Mom went to bed?

Monday, June 24th 2010
I am done with the numbers. Aunt Sherrie baked Pecan pie, and I have fallen in love.
Ah! Remember Jesus loves you!
20) I lied. Behave yourself
21) If your time ain't come not even a doctor can kill you
-At The Fort
-Posted at 3pm (3 hours ago)
Checked before dinner. I hope all this Religion doesn't convert My Girl.

Tuesday June 25th 2010
22) Squirt some chocolate sauce in your Diet Coke (go on wussies, try it!)
23) it's OK to cuss fire ants (if you don't already!)
24) Learn how to shell beans
25) Be baptized in a creek (doing that next Sunday!)
25) Take in strays (will do as soon as i get home)
-At Water Hole
-Posted at Noon (6 hours ago)
Dinner time. I have already spiked my drink. I already cuss fire ants. My Girl has been turned. Our cat is a stray.

Wednesday, June 26th 2010
26) Don't avoid the family reunion (*Blush* Guilty)
27) Stop and smell the honeysuckle (and then try it. As in eat it)
28) Let the kids camp out in the backyard (doing that tonight!)
I have milked a cow
-At Fort
-Posted at 3pm (8 hours ago)
After bedtime: Also guilty, blame Mom.

Thursday June 27th 2010
29) Learn to tell a really scary ghost story ( I invented one last night!)
30) Watch Andy Griffith ( love it!)
31) Pay attention to your grandparents stories (Sadly Grandma is dead)
32) Learn to drive a tractor (Fun!)
They're having a revival tonight!
-At En Route to Revial
-Posted at 7pm (6 hours ago)
(1am: I know loads of stories. My grandmother LOVES Andy Griffth.)

Friday, June 28th 2010
33) Know the best BBQ in town (We went there for dinner last night)
34) If ur not wearing a jacket, roll up ur sleeves.
35) Proper woman only wear lipstick at night (agree!)
36) Know the diffrence between a 2nd cousin and a 1st cousin once removed (Still don't)
Made Ice-cream!
-At Barn
-Posted at 5pm (5 hours ago)
Bedtime: I love BBQ! I Agree to #35.

Saturday, June 29th 2010
THREE WEEKS!!
37) Take the longest stick you can find to the weenie roast (Last night)
38) Never forget the s'mores (Duh!)
39) Flip over June bugs that are stuck on their backs (I learned this from a five year old!)
40) Let folks off the hook without making a scene (Yes)
-At Dinner
-Poster at 6pm (5 hours ago
11pm: I wanna go to a weenie roast! I love s'mores! I agree to number 40

Sunday, June 30th 2010
The last day of June!
41) if you invite trouble don't fuss if it accepts (True dat)
42) Always drive fast enough down a dirt road to keep ahead of your own dust.
I was baptized!
-At Church
-Posted at 9am
Kaylee Thomas commented: Girl! I miss you! I wish I was there! (12pm)

Monday, July 1st 2010
The First day of July!
43) The best place to be during a thunderstorm is the front porch swing (as tested last night!)
44) Pull over whenever you meet a funeral procession
45) If it doens't make you cry then you ain't eating a decent pepper (My mouth is still burning)
I have fallen in love with RC cola and peanuts.
-At Back of truck
-posted at 10am
Kaylee Thomas commented: You should post pictures girl! You know I love a good thunderstorm! Bring me back some peppers and RC. I can get the peanuts from my aunt. She pops them instead of lighting a cigarette! (4pm)
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