The Ballard of Willard

The Ballard of Willard
By Kevin

Willy Willard Woo
Had such a strange name
He didn’t know what to do
So he packed his things
And boarded a bus for Kallamazoo

Kallamazoo was a town full of fun
Where Willy’s strange name
Was not the only one
There was Sally Snu Snarkleflu
And Billy Bat Snackercrat
There was Gilbert Gro Frumplfro
And Jennifer Jill Whipperwill

There were so many with names overdone
That Willy began to miss being the only one
Whose name was known to one and all
Back home where he never felt forgotten or small


Willy Willard Woo decided that while Kallamazoo was nice
He’d had enough
So he repacked all of his favorite bits and baubles
All his most treasured stuff

Homeward bound was Willy Willard Woo
Boxes upon boxes
Heaped into a canoe
Which was piloted by a man
Named Galloping Gary Gnu

The trip home was long and perilous
White water rapids and electric eels monstrous
Made Willy Willard Woo wish he had taken a bus

But alas he arrived at home in one piece
And was greeted by his Aunt his Uncle his nephew and niece
Back home among friends and family Willy Willard Woo
Was happy to have a strange name even if he knew not what to do