Thoughts

There was something about that scenic view that brought us closer together. Something about it just seemed right. In some way. At the moment all I could do is stare at those beautiful eyes of his and just wonder what he might have been thinking. I did not know what to think of it.

The sun light was perfect; the air was still; it was a little chilly. It was like there was nobody else in the world, just him and I. I could very clearly hear a faint sound of piano music in the background; knowing it was probably only in my dear head. Either way, the time was perfect. A perfect time for a kiss.

He stepped forward, help my hand and spoke words unrecognizable by my ear at the time. All I saw were his lips moving. Moving in the movement of the words I love you, but still I could not hear the words being spoken. I could only hear the song of birds in the distant trees. He leaned in for a kiss.

As I was thinking it was going to happen! Already. Finally! What am I supposed to do? I am so confused and nervous. All those thoughts went through my head at the time. He swept the hair off my neck and started with a light kiss on my cheek.

It was so soft. So soft it didn’t seem real. It felt as if I were dreaming, or possibly imagining all that I see. As soft as a rose pedal; as warm as a winter coat; as smooth as the skin of baby were his lips upon my cheek. At this time I knew I was dreaming. I was sure of it.

He swept his hand across the back of my neck and held it there for what seemed like eternity. Held it with a force, but yet a kindness. A strange combination that said, the strength to protect you from harm, yet melt in slight sound of your voice. To that feeling I fell weak in the knees. As if he knew, he held my free hand, and once again spoke words unrecognizable to my hear. Words of love and tenderness.

He tilted his head towards mine, and I know this was going to be a kiss for sure. I held my head up and stared into those beautiful brown eyes and kissed his soft lips. It felt like heaven had fallen all around us. I did not know what was happening in our surrounding, just that I heard the song of birds and the slight sound of piano near by.

As soon as he released, I realized that I was imagining all of this. I was ten feet away from him talking in a crowd of friends. I had imagined the whole scenario as if from a movie. I felt stupid because of the way I thought of it; and the idiocy of him standing only 10 feet away and I haven’t even said hi. My heart portrays one thing while my brain says other wise.

Love. Love? What is that, other than a four letter word that has been phrased over the ages. A short phrase that tells one single person that you care about them and their being. A short phrase that is used among families very often; mostly with mothers and their children. They say that a mother’s love is something so pure, it could not be corrupted in any way possible. A mother’s love to their child is something that Gods can’t even explain, yet in this world today live some cold hearted women.

That’s what they call them. Cold hearted. If you ask those mothers who leave their children with other people under adoption, if they have ever even thought how their child might look like today, of course they’ll say that they’ve probably thought of it twice a day since the day the child was adopted.

Possibly it’s just me, but I believe that love is something that very few people in this world truly experience. The act of “loving” someone is something very difficult to explain. Especially in my point of view. I’ve never loved anyone other then my parents, or siblings, or pet. Those three categories do not count, in my opinion. Yet I know of people who those three categories were never loved. It’s kind of unbelievable that people like that might just exist. Sin is has corrupts their way of thinking, I ponder. Then again, maybe they were raised like that. Raised in sin.

Still, love. I do not understand it. Not that it is un-understandable, but more like my brain cannot comprehend it. Possibly it’s just an intense way of showing compassion. I long for love and compassion. More than a lot of things. It’s probably not something healthy to long for, that I know, but I do.

Other than talking about love, today has been different. Different in many ways. I do not really know how to describe it, other than it’s different.