a misfit, trying to find myself |
I want chemicals I want happiness I want it in my veins I want it in my soul I want to omit the happiness you seek I want to bleed the confidence you dream And when I dance and when I shun your fear you see how truly beautiful it is to be alive and When I tell you now To stop fragmenting my sentences To stop quantifying my happiness You raise your voice, you call me cutesy little names that anger my ego and your lameness is so trivial to me I scoff and hit enter When I run on the ropes as you walk on the sidewalk my eyes glimmer and my soul is light and bears with it youth that you try to destroy with your disgust With your distrust With your dirty jealous eyes Week after week we laugh at those who mask themselves, we spit on the bare-faced mannequins parading among those who seek life but they fear, and fear shows upon relief Muscles relaxed, an almost smirk, and those who don’t understand, like you, bask in judgment you are afflicted by your tension and you deteriorate as your dreams slither away and your reality, is not mine, and the chemicals They remind me that I can be, in a bubble, floating, and yet among you I lose my disguise I lose my anger I retain only the goodness that I want to share And share I do , and it radiates! It becomes addictive And when they leave, the chemicals they leave I am THROWN back into your world I eat honey off a spoon to remember the sweetness that the world binges, I run barefaced, like a child, as I leap down the stairs of spontaneity, Sweet innocent youth prevails as I try to live among you again, And with a glimmer of hope I roam around, forcefully ignorant, I refuse to belief that The stars aren’t mine I ignore your assertions of reality, And desperately cling onto mine, I want happiness. I want it all the time. You will not take it from me. I want to omit the happiness you seek I want to bleed the confidence you dream |