A Day In The Life Of Alex Gaskarths Cell

Why does Alex wear such tight pants? I mean, he is dancing up on stage, and how can this make his legs feel even the slightest bit comfortable. Whatever, not my problem to worry about. Oh great, now I can smell the massive amounts of axe he is laying on his body, perfect. Whatever, he has to take me out of his pocket before he goes onstage, right? I swear I will delete three of my apps if he just leaves me in his pocket.
Huh, why is Alex walking? Fangirls are screaming, oh perfect, Alex forgot to take me out again. First app to delete, his precious little Twitter app. Oh, wait. Why is Alex grabbing me?! No, this isn’t the deal. He cannot take me out while on stage and throw me to one of the backstage help. Oh, my photo app is being opened. Ohh, I get it now! Alex is taking a picture of the crowd! This crowd is filled with very attractive people, huh. Now I know why he wanted to take a picture of them. Alex doesn’t even bother to close the app and he jams me into his back pocket. Great, I now have a great view of blackness.
Finally the set ends and Alex skips offstage with his secret boyfriend, Jack, at his side. How is it the fans think it’s just a funny joke they do? No, they are seriously in love. Every time Jack tweets Alex starts to squeal and throws me on the ground. Does he even think about how I can get hurt? My screen could crack or my case could chip, Alex just doesn’t think! Whatever, at least I get to scream at him in the morning until he wakes up.
Crap! I can hear them, the fangirls. They always try to find ways into Alex’s dressing room, some get in and hide in the closet until Alex comes back from doing a meet and greet. A piercing sound is about to break my microphone! Oh, just a high-pitched fangirl, except it sounds really close. Great, she got into the room. Every time this happens Jack has to come into the room and try to comfort Alex since fangirls scare him. Maybe I can do something! I mean, I do know how to make a lot of loud, annoying noises. I mean, I do have Justin Bieber in my music app. Time for this cell phone to actually do something good! I am just about to start blasting some of the loudest music I have in my playlist when I hear the boys stage bodyguard approaching. Ehh, Big Bill ought to scare the girl off, if anyone could make a stalker fangirl leave it’s Big Bill. The shrilling creek of the doorknob slices through the silence of the room and I can almost feel the fangirls hand on my case. No, it’s not almost, this fangirl is stealing me! Who does that? I mean, okay Alex is a big deal to some girls but stealing his cellphone is just wrong. Big Bill’s booming voice fills the air and I can hear that he is screaming at her, something about theft. Oh, me! Big Bill must have noticed that I was in the fangirls hand, three cheers for Big Bill!
“Thumpt!” The fangirl threw me onto the coffee table! Okay, first you want me, then you throw me around like I’m a old Nokia phone? No thank you, I am a iPhone 4, and I don’t deserve being thrown onto coffee tables by anyone except Alex! Girl, you have this coming to you. I’m playing Justin Bieber! As I am turning on my music app I can hear Alex’s voice, great. Alex is going to get himself into a tizzy and will need his ‘other half’ to comfort him. Alex reaches for me and is pressing my sleep button, wait what?
I just woke up, and apparently the fangirl had left. Jack was sitting next to Alex, but they were just watching Mean Girls. From my perspective, it was just another typical night on tour with the crazy boys of All Time Low. I’m a young phone now, but give me a couple more months of this and I’ll be too old to handle this every night. For now though, I’m going to try my hardest to give Alex exactly what he needs to make it through tour. I may not be the smartest smartphone on the market, but I know that Alex loves me and at the end of the day, I guess I love him too.