Adventure Fantasy: Needs Critiquing for ideas to develop. Leave comments or email. |
NOTE to reader Text in Red like this speaks to both you and me to consider what add or change in the future. Text in Gray is apart of the story in some way but needs critiquing in chronology and such. Chapter: Amethyst Seized Our tale begins in the high seas of the Oriental Ocean where a small enterprising vessel donned the Amethyst sailed homeward bound from another upcoming village on Lunar Island. The crew of seven assessed the goods they collected in return of good faith and societal/economic support for future endeavors. “Wow! This is some neat stuff they gave us, [insert what items they have] we should have no problem selling these items back home,” Candace said. “Are you kidding me? I think they are just showing off just to say they are better than us,” Kyle added. “Nah, I don’t think they’re trying to do that. They have no reason to show off.” “How’s things with you and Julian?” “I wish there were no things with us. He still won’t talk to me, but he won’t listen to me. He makes me so mad.” “Oh okay, I won’t mention him anymore. If it makes you feel any better. -- Hey, speaking of which to change the subject what’s that other there?” Both Kyle and Candace look starboard and from behind and they see a strange ship approaching in there direction. I was significantly larger than the Amethyst but still medium sized, equipped with bigger sails, cannons, and more elaborate stuff. “Is that a…?” Candace asked. “It can’t be.” Kyle answered. But it was…a pirate ship named “Fairy Queen”. The Amethyst was too small to outrun it, they had no choice but to accept their fate, stand there and watch as it came closer and lowered a ramp onto it’s deck. The Amethyst had no items for defending itself as well is it’s crew against the 14 Fairy Queen crew member, yet only seven of them stood out. The rest were simply subordinate pirates. Four of them walked down the ramp and stood evenly below, as who appeared to be the ringleader stepped down the ramp with stroking her pet cat in her arms as if the royal carpet had been laid for her. She was somewhat short with a voluptuous and curvaceous body, with long hair covered the top with a bandana, two big earrings, shades, and designer pirate clothes, and her tall boots. As she flipped the shades up from her lens, she spoke as the Amethyst crew was speechless. “Well, well well, what do you guys have here for me?” “We have nothing here for you, we don’t even know you.” Candace answered. “Oh that’s right, how rude of me. Allow me to introduce myself. I am the one, the only and absolutely fabuloso…Big Booty!” And these arrrgh me mateys, The Lovely Masked Mermaid, Trixie the Gypsy Queen, Black Thunder, our eye candy Dark Shark Tooth Viper, and don’t forget about my precious, precious kitty, Rusty Nails. And together… We… Are… The Fairy Queen Pirates of the Orient.” Just then Black Thunder interjected – “Where is she? Mistress you said she would be here…” (Big Booty then hushes Black Thunder by putting her finger on Thunder's lips) “Pirates? There are no such things Pirates anymore!” Patrick claimed. “Yeah, and since when were their women pirates?” Kyle added. “(Laughs Heartily), men are so gullible (tugs at Kyle's Cheeks). That’s were you are wrong sweetie. Pirates can thrive, and they can come in any shape (outlines her body), size (cups her chest) or gender (whips her hair back), okay honey?” “What do you want?” Candace added. “Pffff, what do you think I want? Like I just dropped by to say hi. I want this ship, and everything on it. Come to think of it, I could use a few new mates for my crew, any volunteers?” “We don’t want to join your crew, nor give you our ship.” Candace answered. “Maybe I didn’t make myself clear. We are pirates, we get what we want through force! DON'T make us use it.” “Go ahead, I don’t think you have any.” Kyle bluffed. “(Laughs) Boy, you’re so crazy! You have no idea what kinds of powers we poss…ooh, and who is this fine young man?” Big Booty became distracted as her taste for men what one of weaknesses. Her eyes came up Julian, near bare-chested with all his hard work for the day, showing off is sculptured body of a god. Booty began to examine and graze her subject, but a hot Candace warned her. “Don’t touch him! He’s mine!” Booty smiles as her eyes squinted. (Sweetly) “Well, that just makes things more interesting doesn’t it? (Sternly) You see, once they get some Booty, they are mine, all mine, (sweetly) and I don’t share. (Proudly) I'm a Diva, and I deserve the best!” Booty begins to caress all over Julian who doesn’t seem to be trying to defend her advances. “Julian you better tell that ho’ you’re taken!!!” “I can make my own decisions, thank you. I don’t need you to keep telling me what to do all the time.” Julian answered. “That’s right, let a man make his own decisions, they always make the right ones, huh baby?” Candace, now infuriated lunged at Julian and slapped him, but though he barely flinched, so she continued attempting to hurt him but Julian brushed her off and Candace fell. As she tried to get up again she was mysteriously thrown aback in mid air as Trixie stared hard at her. Medusa who had this crazy hair style that moved eerily even when the wind wasn’t blowing, casted web from her head onto Candace and entangled her. She then used her powerful stare and made the Candace-filled web elevate. “Baby girl, you need to chill out and realize that he don’t want you anymore. He wants a real woman now.” “(Growls angrily) What did you do him?!!” “Nothing that you shouldn’t had done, but one man’s trash is another woman’s pleasure! (To Kyle) And oh yes, I guess that answers your question about the powers we possess. Trixie's Voodoo is one of many we all have. Even my little Rusty has a few. But why spoil that surprise to you when this is all we need to capture you. (Snaps her fingers to signal her crew to take action)” The Amethyst crew begins to realize their doom and submit to Booty’s demands. The four comrades begins takes the crew along with Candace abroad their ship as prisoners. “But Mistress, where is she? Where is White Lightning?! She has the Dark Star!!!” Black Thunder demanded. “(Sighs), Okay. Is anyone here named White Lightning?” Big Booty asked. The crew shook their heads in confusion. “I’m sorry girl, I guess she’s not on here.” “(Frustrated groan) Dammit!!!” “Girl, you better watch your language. We don’t talk like that here.” “You told me she would be here!” Thunder exclaimed as she tried to calm herself. “Well yes, I thought she would. I was wrong, I screwed up. Don’t worry, we’ll find her.” “No, I can’t take it anymore, I’m going to find her myself!” “No, you need to check your little attitude, because I need you on The Q to assess our new vessel like everyone else, and all the important meetings and stuff. Besides, where are you going to go with all this water around us?” “(Sighs)” Still frustrated, and nearly at the point of revolting, she reluctantly comes to her senses and board the Fairy Queen. The Amethyst was then looted for all the items they gathered at Crescent Village. The ship was then attached to The Q portside behind another small vessel, as it continue to an unknown location. __________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Later, aboard The Q in the prison quarters, the Amethyst crew finds the other prisoners from a previous hijacking, and their ship also was stowed on the inside like the Amethyst. After some discussion, it is discovered that their vessel The Malaya a crew of 12 met a similar fate, and was also defenseless. Meanwhile for whatever reason she was not placed in a cell like the others, but a net hanging above the ceiling. Still entangled in the net she managed to grab a knife in her pocket to cut through it. Once free, she surveyed the surrounded to find a way out. “Candace. Your free. Do you think you can get us out of here too?” Patrick asked. “How? We are stuck in the middle of nowhere.” “But we can’t stay here, they’ll make us slaves.” Kyle added. “All I’m concerned about is what did skank do to my man.” Candace raved. "Uh, we have lives too." Kyle. "I'm sorry, you know I can't think straight when things aren't right with me. Don't worry I won't leave you guys hanging. Especially after what you all done for me. Now where is Julian?" “I think she took him with her.” Patrick answered “Face it Candace, I don’t think Julian cares about you anymore, he’s mistreated you before, this may be what he’s been trying to tell you all along.” “Look you don’t know Julian like I do. He’s just been going through a rough time since he lost his job, and trouble with his family. He told me before he never means it, and I believe him. He’s just not always a very affectionate person, so that’s why he does cold stuff.” “Well…uh okay. I guess.” Kyle responded. “Hey man love is crazy, women will do that to you. I have a few of those in my life too.” Jorge added.” “But still how are we going to get out of here?” Kyle reinterated. “We’ll have to wait until we hit landfall before we can really escape, but then we maybe stranded away from home. Plus I can’t wait if they are doing something to Julian. I have to fight for my love.” “Wait a minute, didn’t you say you can swim? You were a champion at swimming marathons in school?” Patrick claimed. “Well yeah, that was a long time ago.” “I think Patrick is on to something. I believe you can do it. Judging by the movements of the ship, it seems we are going in the same general direction we would have been going, so we shouldn’t be too far from our own coast running aside it, maybe about 5 to 10 miles tops, and you’ve done that before in the swimmers decathlon. I think we’re headed for North Shore Bay, I heard one of the Pirates say something about that. If you can swim back to shore, you can tell the nearest town on the Middle Continent of our capture and the Malaya’s capture maybe we can all be rescued. I believe there is a Martial Arts training clan with warriors, they could rescue us.” Dinesh added. “Do you think that Lightning character one of the pirates kept meantioning is a warrior too?” Patrick asked. “I don’t know. That name sounds to vaguely familiar. She may be able to at least shed on light on this.” "I've never had to pleasure of seeing a female warrior, that should be hot!" Kyle said. Okay. I’ll give it a try. But I’m still scared and confused. My man is being seduced by that…ooh, don’t get me started about her.” “Yeah, you have to find a way out of here before we past our shore.” “Are you sure we are within 10 miles of shore Dinesh?” “Have I ever miscalculated distance and direction before?” “Are you guys going to be okay?” “We guys can get along alright; I don’t think those pirates will do much to us if we do what they say.” Kyle. “What about Whitney?” “I don’t think you’ll ever have to worry about her. She’s got her imagination to keep her company. And the Malaya crew has been here longer than us, so they may okay too.” “Okay guys, wish me luck, I had my eye on a small hole in the corner, I think that my lead somewhere and I can crawl through that.” Sure enough Candace was able to crawl through the hole; it was a ventilation shaft with the cover missing. She then found herself outside on the deck of the ship. Fortunately the coast was clear, but not for long. Over portside of the Q, was their Amethyst, still being looted by three of the crew, Mermaid, Thunder and Shark . Above, across the horizon she could foresee a shore in the vague distance. One more look and it appear the trio was still engaged in the looting, she took a deep breath and plunged below, and swam like she never swam before. Meanwhile the splash of water, caught the attention of the trio. “What was that?” Black Thunder asked “A big fish maybe?” Shark Tooth answered. “I know my fishes, they don’t splash like that. – Someone’s escaped, and I bet I know who. (Radio) Mistress?” “Come in my Masked Mermaid dearest.” Big Booty answered over the Radio. “You’re biggest fan just exited stage left. Shall I go in pursuit?” “Aw man, I wanted her to walk the plank. Now that takes the fun out of it! Where would she go?” “I’m not sure, but I’m curious just like you. I doubt she wouldn’t be swimming just for fun. I think she knows there is land ahead.” “Hmm, we can’t just go off course, we need to get to the North Shore Bay ASAP. And I am interested to see where she’s headed…But we just can’t let her get away either. Just stay close to her, and then we’ll do that thing you know. I have a bone to pick with her.” “Yes, Mistress, I’ll go after her right away, and collect any new information” “Oh yeah, and get me some more pearls, they look cute on me!” “No fair, how come you get to go?” Thunder asked. “You can’t swim like I can, darling. I’ll see you two later, and I’ll keep in touch.” And so the Masked Mermaid went in pursuit of Candace towards Avenue Creek. Chapter In search of a rescue In busy town Avenue Creek, the usual day to day activity was in progress. It is both a recreational resort, residential community of native people, and a seaport of shipping and receiving goods from other towns and far away lands. She is drenched, soaking wet, her hair clinging to her face and clothing. Exhausted from swimming nearly 10 miles from shore Candace collapsed in a nearby carriage with soft material in it's bed, and momentarily passed out. When she came to, the carriage was in a different location, still in avenue creek, but in the western half the the village. It was apparent that civilization was becoming scarce. The driver of the carriage was no where to be found. Still disoriented she gathered herself as much as possible, she continued aimlessly into the woods looking for help. Just as it seemed that finding anyone for help wasn't going to be easy... [In future you may consider adding a comedic scene with the driver of the carriage discovering Candice being startled escapes and as an add on to what the driver was selling to his current stop] Candace: "(Yelling) Help! Help! I need to find Lightning. Is there anyone one name Lightning here? How do I find her?" (Owl hoots) Candace: "Oh...I don't think I'll find anyone down here." YM: "Do not give up hope...your voice will be heard." Candace: "Who said that?" YL: "Look to the heavens" (Candace looks up) YM: "She means up in the trees" (Candace finds a young man sitting on a branch and a young lady hovering near him). Candace: "Whoa, I must really tired...are you floating?" YL: "I prefer to classify it as Levitating. It is a gift I was born with, I did not know how to use it until recently..." ----- (Both comes down from above) YM: "Not all talents we possess are inborn. Regardless, social outcasting is quite common among us. Life can be quiet lonely." Oh that so sad. YL: "In contrast, we are fortunate to have each other, and that is what matters most." "I can definately relate to that." YL: "I can sense dispair in your heart. There must be something troubling you." YM: "You are soaking wet, dehydrated and starved, we must renourish you." Candace: "Yes I do need help. Our ship, The Amethyst was hijacked by pirates! Not just ordinary pirates, Women Pirates! They took over our ship and imprisioned my crew. But I managed to escaped and swam all the way here to this town. And we need a rescue." YM: "Pirates! So they are still around, I knew it! And they said it gone out of style. It was a cover up." Candace: "Before I escape my crew and I remembered that one of them mentioned someone named Lightning and some kind of star. Do you know anyone like that?" YL: "Of course. White Lightning. She is a sorceress and our Sensei. Miraculously you have discovered the person you seek in one try. I knew we were drawn here for a reason, I felt your energy." YM: "Again, one of her talents, sensing things." Candace: "Sorceress? A woman like me?... Are you kidding? Can she help rescue my friends?" YL: "Our Sensei is always up for new challenges. I'm sure an adventure to help good hearted people like you will jump to the top of her list." YM: "Let us take you to her, we were about to start class for today. By the way I'm Mountain Fox, and this is Psychic Soul. We are students of our sensei White Lightning, making us warrior-sorcers in training. However, the two of us as well as a few others choose not to engage in battle." Candace: "Why?" Psychic Soul: "We believe in peace. We are to only use our powers either in self defense or self-enlightenment." Mountain Fox: "Or in emergency situations we can put up a good fight and stay in shape just in case. So we always have to stay sharp and alert." Candace: "I am Candace Lovelace." Mountain Fox: "The famous decathlon swimmer?" Psychic Soul: "(Gasp) Fox, I think she swam to shore for miles to escape." Candace: "Yes I had to. My skin is so weathered." Mountain Fox: "We must get you nourished." Mountain Fox and Psychic Soul took Candace deeper into forest where White Lightning and her class were holding sessions. Her class was in the background either chatting or practicing some moves on each other. Both Fox and Soul greeting their sensei respectively in a bow and curtsey. Mountain Fox: "Sensei White Lightning, we bring to you one Candace Lovelace, she is in distress, and could use your assistance..." White Lightning: (Holds up her hand to stop Fox) "Thank you my students, you may recess. I shall handle it from here." Mountain Fox and Psychic Soul departs reluctantly, on her way out Soul glances at Candace and touches her empathetically. Lightning: "May I address you as Candace?" Candace: "Yes...sure.." Lightning: "Sit. I only have tea at the moment. We will serve refreshments shortly." Candace, obliges for the hot tea to get the taste of dried salt water out of her mouth. Lightning: "Tell me ordeal, and how I may help you." Candace: "Like I told your students, my ship the Amethyst were high jacked by pirates...Women Pirates! (Lightning gives a look of intrigue) Candace: "There were seven of us aboard pulling a job for a company we applied for some quick income. We were to go to Crescent Village on Lunar Island and pick up [items] and deliver them to Cloud Nine to aid them to recover from the recent storm. The whole trip was to take 2 days. And so we were able to pick up the items, and all we had to do was to deliver it, and we were almost there, to Cloud Nine’s port, when they came: A ship donned The Fairy Queen. (Sternly) The ringleader called herself Big Booty and she stole my man Julian away! They locked us up in the bowel of the ship unsupervised, but I managed to break free, and everyone telling me I should swim to shore to rescue them because I am an excellent swimmer and won the marathon. So I gather the strength and I swam between 8 to 10 miles here, which I don't know where I am. I maybe the only one who escaped. Even if I’m not, I must rescue the others. I was actually making developing a bond with my new friends. they are truly one of a kind people. Also some of the things we were shipping would be given to us as a bonus after we completed the job. It's all for a good cause without those supplies many may go out of business, or go hungry especially children supplies.” Lightning: "How deplorable!" Candace: "Oh yes, it may have been personal reasons why they attacked us. One of them was asking for White Lightning, I presume that could be you." Lightning: “Seriously? I don’t know any pirates, nor why any of them would know me.” Candace: “She said Lightning had something called a Star.” Lightning: “The Dark Star?" Candace: "Yes that it! What is The Dark Star?" Lightning: "The Dark Star is one of the Rainbow Crystals of Mysterious/Natural Energy. I believe they are an ancient legend in which they repeat in a cycle every few generations they re-emerge and then submerge after sometime. Not many people know about it because it's only been recently that we've recognize it's occurrence, much less it's powers. It had to be someone who was in my training clan years ago. But who?" Candace: "Is it true, that you have the Dark Star?" Lightning: "I won it in a tournament back when I was younger, but long since given it away for safe keeping so it wouldn’t fall into the wrong hands. It gave me a creepy feeling when I was around it, and I didn’t understand how to use it. I felt if something happened to it, the world could be in danger. The others Crystals I believe could still be still hidden or at least in unknown locations." If one possess all Five, they could become invincible and omnipotent." Candace: "There has to be a reason why she wants it, maybe she knows how to use it. Only one of them was interested in finding you the others were interested in our posessions." Lightning: “Did you happened to catch that pirate name, or what she looked like?” Candace: “I think so, Big Booty had introduced them all to us. But I don’t know if I remember all of their names...let's see... Um…I remember the one that was chasing me swam very well, and should have caught me but seemed to let up. She may be that Mermaid character. A Gypsy Queen that put some voodoo on me and I went flying in the air! There was a guy, I think his name was Shark Tooth, she call him their eye candy. And the other one was the one asking for you, but I cannot remember her name. She was tall, kinda thick, she wore a lot of black…infact that might have been her name. Black…Thunder.” “Black Thunder? That still doesn’t ring a bell with all of those descriptions. Maybe her name has changed, or we never met before and she simply heard about me.” Lightning answered.” Candace: “She was really upset when you weren’t there. So anyways, I was hoping that an elite warrior-sorceress White Lightning a great leader, smart, sensible, could help me rescue my crew and my Boyfriend Julian. I miss him so much and I hope he’s still alive. How fitting it is for me to find a heroine to battle villainess.” Lightning: “The sooner we rescue them the better. This is unlike anything I ever done before, a real mission and mystery to solve. I’m curious to who knows me.” Candace: “I think I know where they went. I heard that they might be heading to North Shore Bay. We should try investigating there first." "(to herself)Should I bring my students with me? I may need them and this would be a great learning experience for them. Not all of them are mature enough, so I must be selective." White Lightning thought. Candace: "None of this seems real. Women pirates, swimming in a salty ocean, sorcerers, levitating, psychic, supernatural powers. Is this a dream, nightmare, or a hallucination? Did I die or something? "Women Pirates. I've never imagined such a fantasy." Candace: "Fantasy??? Men...it was a nightmare for me. Especially their leader. She was as arrogant and air minded as they come" "Do you know the name of the Pirates, or their ship?" Candace: "I saw the name Fairy Queen as odd as that sounds. It was much larger than ours, and that big mouthed girl introduced herself as Big Booty. I'm sure I could remember more if I was relaxed. But I'd never forget what she did to me. (leans closer) She insulted me, and was making advances at my man. (leans back in normal position) I also think one them was chased me as I was swimming away, but I didn't see her afterwhile. I guess I lost her. I have to rescue them. They are the closest friends and all I have in my life right now. "I think I know where to find them at least. I heard from one of them...something about North Shore Bay. If I hurry I probably catch them there before I loose my last remaining lead. Or at very least find some clues where there were heading to next." White Lightning was one of three trained by the Master Wizard himself, the first and only female student." Candace: "Master Wizard?" Yes, he lives in the Northern Part of the continent. He primarily teaches, martial arts, recreational art, self defense, general education, and wisdom of life. But a secret many didn't know or believe is that he actually empowered his most deserving pupils special crafts. She is one of them... White Lightning. In fact I think White Lightning was in fact the Wizard's star student." Candace: "Wow, are you serious? Better than the male warriors?" Sometime later, White Lightning summoned her entire class. Her most trained students: Red-Eye Jupiter, Grey Ghost, Raging Raven, Iron Steel, her male students plus Foxy Fire, and Storm her female students to accompany her. Mountain Fox and Psychic Soul, a young man and lady in training but were known as pacificist in request to watch over her home and her remaining class, while away. "My students, there is a situation among us that I've been called upon to answer. It is a rescue mission that may require some defense tactics, in which our skills in Martials may become necessary. I feel that this will be a great learning experience for my most trained students, as well as myself to lead a team for the sake of our community family. I will spare you the details until my return. I'm offering that you guys before me to partake in this challenge. You do not have to accept, as I am capable of handling this myself, but I do not wish to be selfish. My younger students, I will have you to stay here under the tutelage of Mountain Fox and Psychic Soul." "Teacher's Pets" someone yelled out. "I know who that was, and I will not name names but I WILL deal with you when I come back. Fox, Soul, follow my lesson plans I've left for you. You know what to do if there is any disobedience." "Milady, please take this with you. It allows us to stay in connection with each other no matter where you are, in case my special talents are of use for you." Psychic Soul gave White Lightning half a blue crystal that PS kept close to her. "Of course Soul, your help is always needed, I'll take it, but most importantly take care of your brothers and sisters. Don't become Bullheaded either." "Oh no your honor, I've learned from before, we won't do that. We are very honored to lead your class in your absence, we won't let you down." Fox said. "Remember the two of you will have to learn to work together. That's one reason why I chose two people to lead and not one." Lightning then hugged Fox and Soul and then proceeded to other elder students. "Okay guys. Here's the deal. We are going to do some serious travel, and some battles may occur. Are you in or is anyone out?" (no one disagrees) "There is no chickening out once we begin. We Finish what we start. Since no one left, you are now IN if you leave you are out of my class forever. I'm serious! Am I CLEAR?!!!" "Yes Sensei!" the Class said. "This is a rescue mission. We have to find the Amethyst ship crew. It's believed to have been hijacked by Pirates." "Pirates?!!! Are you serious?" "Yes I am very serious. Perhaps they haven't died out after all. It doesn't matter. Our client is named Candace Lovelace. She will join us and lead us to North Shore Bay where she thinks they are hiding. There was another ship the Malaya that disappeared recently and she told me she saw the crew also imprisoned there too. Iron Steel, I want you to bodyguard her at all times. We will meet up with her on the North Side of town. Follow my lead and no one gets in trouble." Later in the day, the ladies were preparing to leave for North Shore Bay. Candace was by herself at a lodge when there was a knock at her door. “Courtesy Delievery for Candace Lovelace.” A man in a uniform asked. “Really? How did anyone know I was here? Sorry I can't accept right now, I’m about to leave. Could you come back later?” “I tell you what…why don’t you come with me?” “Huh?” The man who then pulls out a large clam shell, opens it and a giant light flashes and traps Candace in a pearl inside the clam. It was none other than the Masked Mermaid cleverly disguised as a Delivery man. “Thought you could get away, huh candy girl? (chuckles then pauses) I didn’t think so. (sighs, admires and kisses the clamshell) I wish we could capture bigger and multiple things with these, I have my eye on the jewelry store down the street, but it will have to wait.” Mermaid re-disguised herself and went toward North Shore Bay taking the shortest possible water route. |