Cycle of Death

I'm dead, or at least that's what I'm beginning to figure I am. At the end your mind turns back to the beginning of things, and since my mind always

reflects back to the start of things every few minutes, I must be in a constant static/dynamic state of death, revolving about between my multiple starts

and ends. My origin now a twisted view, ensconced in a darkening outer shell. Unfortunately the shell doesn't seem to be too protective. Just there as a

hindrance and a type of show piece to piss me off as it pleases,. My own eyes still pry away at what's there. I keep seeing myself making fuck ups. I

keep walking into more fucked up situations, I keep seeing how It'll end with the wrong choices, and with the right, and I fuck up some more. Its a very

chronically depressing cycle. So just as each life passes by, a new death emerges seemingly to report to me that it has happened and I have died

again. The most fucked up of it all is waking up to do it all again. Vicious is the cycle that brings me or any man awake to bear another day in this

hellish world. whether it be hell for a day or or heaven for an hour it keeps happening. I wish and hope for some conclusive actions to emerge in this

cycle. And if I'm lucky maybe they will be positive, a light at the end of this tunnel.... I know its not a realistic or likely outcome. But I can at least hope

for some sort of mercy when it all ends.