A Beautiful Future

The sky was a dark grey. The world looked dull, as usual. Nothing looked the same to Ella after that summer night. She had left soon after then, it was too painful to stay. So she had gone, taking nothing but a bag with some clothes, food, and money.



Currently, Ella was at a dusty bar in a small village, sipping a glass of water. A pretty bar tender walked over to Ella.



“Going to order anything, love?” she asked, with a soft, lilting voice.



“No, thank you,” Ella replied. Not now, not ever. The man next to her winked saucily at the bar girl after spitting into his glass. Didn’t the people here ever think about what they were doing? Disgusted, she dropped off of the barstool, and went to the back of the tavern, into the bathroom. She checked to make sure no one was with her, and proceeded to lock herself in a stall. Crouching down beside the toilet, Ella used one hand to hold her hair thinning brown hair back. Then, before she could think of her mother or her father or anything nice, she stuck a finger down her throat. The effect was immediate, producing her lunch in a semi-digested form in the toilet. Ella shut her eyes and flushed it away. She leaned her clammy forehead against the cool door before unlocking it. Washing her hands, Ella looked up into the mirror. Her cheeks were hollow and there were dark circles under her eyes. Her lips were chapped. Ella’s hair, once soft and vivid orange-brown, was now lank and faded. What she missed most, though, were her eyes. They were so pretty before, all brown and sparkly. Now, they were flat and dull, just like everything else in her life.



Pulling out a mint from her purse, Ella reapplied her makeup and walked out of the bathroom. She reassumed her place at the bar, asking for another water. Just as she picked it up, though, she heard a voice that shook her.



“Ella?”



No, it couldn’t be him, it was just a memory. There was no way it could be him, because he was gone. Gripping her glass tighter, Ella refused to turn around. But it was too late. Just hearing the voice had brought on a flood of memories.



~ ~ ~

In her memory, that fateful night had begun beautifully. It had been a hot summer’s day in London, but the evening had cooled to a pleasant temperature. Ella was fresh out of college, young and insanely enthusiastic about the future. She had been up in her room, on the phone with her friend, when her mother called for her and told her she had a visitor.

“Hello, beautiful,” the young man said upon the opening of the door.

“Harry!” she cried, throwing her arms around his neck. He kissed her cheek an put an arm around her shoulder. Ella hadn't seen him for weeks as he had been at his grandmother's funeral in America.

“Care for a walk?” he asked. She giggled and nodded.

“Mum, dad, I’m heading out!” she called to her parents. Then, they were off. Ella’s backyard was large and dense with trees. Hand in hand, they walked further and further into the forest. After ten or so minutes, they stopped at a moonlit pond and sat on the bench.

“You are so, so beautiful, Ellie. Don’t let anyone tell you different.” he whispered. And then they were kissing, unlike ever before. His kisses seemed imploring, pleading, desperate even. Ella ran her fingers through his hair and moaned. Abruptly, he pulled back. His electric blue eyes were hard, almost regretful.

“Harry? Harry, what’s wrong?” she asked.

“I’m sorry, Ella, but I have to leave.” he said, not meeting her eyes.

“Oh, that’s alright! I mean, you just got here, but I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?” she asked.

“No, Ella, you don’t understand. I’m not coming back. I need some time for myself. With Nana passing away...I just need to get away from here." he said, stroking her cheek.

"I—I’m breaking up with you.” he was backing away now, almost hidden in the thicket of trees.

“You...what?”

“Goodbye, Ella.” he said, although by now, it was just a whisper from the shadows.



After a few months, Ella just couldn’t take it anymore. She learned later that he had left for the army and was quite certain he would not return. She thought they were in love, to be married one day. It was just too much for her. So she left, not staying in one place very long. That was when the depression set in, among other things. His family heard from him once in a while, but there was no correspondence with Ella. She convinced herself that he was as good as dead. Then Harry himself showed up at the bar, six years later.

~ ~ ~

“Ella?” the voice called again, now accompanied by a hand on her shoulder. She flinched, jolting out of her memories. Closing her eyes she slowly turned around.



“Ella?” the voice asked a third time, now soft and reaching. She took a deep breath and opened her eyes, bracing herself for further disappointment.



Electric blue eyes met her’s, and Ella felt herself flinch.



“Harry?” she asked in a quavering voice. She couldn’t, wouldn’t, believe it was him.



“Yes, it’s me...I— I thought I saw you so I came to say hello and...”

Realization that he was not dead, and, in fact, very much alive hit Ella hard.



“Oh, Ella, what have you done to yourself?”



“I can’t believe you had the nerve to show up here and call my name when all of six years ago, you left me! Just left me! Standing there, all alone, heartbroken. Then you just show up and ask me what I’ve done to myself! More like what did you do to me! I can’t believe you—” she broke off, the sudden bout of yelling too much for her. Placing a cold hand on her forehead, she turned back around.



“I’m so sorry, Ella, I thought it was for the best! Honestly, I did!”



““Do you think I’m stupid?” she asked softly, “That I'm desperate? That I'll take you back after six years of convincing myself you were dead?"



Sitting down on a stool to the right of her, Harry emitted another soft, sad sigh.



“Will you come to my hotel room? This isn’t really the best place to talk about things,” he said, indicating the bar girl who was shamelessly eavesdropping on their conversation.



"Absolutely not."



Getting up, she strode up the set of stairs that led to the sleeping rooms. Taking a right into room number one, she locked the door and collapsed on her bed. The yelling had tired her greatly. Before long, she had succumbed into a the murky darkness of sleep.



They walked out into the main road. His hotel turned out to be only the next building over, the same one Ella herself had been staying in. They walked through the small lobby, which was really only a couple of chairs and a front desk with no one manning it. Taking the creaky stairs to the first story, Ella followed him into the room.



She awoke sometime in the night. There was no clock in her room, so she had to satisfy herself with the pitch-black of the outside world. Ella guessed it was sometime around midnight. Sitting up, she heard a rustling. Something scratched her finger tips. She grabbed what she identified as a piece of paper and read.



“Ella,” it read, “Firstly, I want to tell you my whole story. I know that I have no right to ask you to believe a word I write, but please just try. It started when Nana died. She meant everything to me. When I was little, she would pick me up from school, even though she was terrified of the outside world. Her husband died crossing the street, so it was understandable. Her love for me was, I believe, greater than my mother’s to me. My mum has never cared much for me. She would prefer not to have had a child at all. So, when Nana died, a piece of me was buried with her. I couldn’t stop thinking that if I had flown to America more, gone and visited more, she wouldn’t have died. I felt my presence upon you would only hurt. The sadness in my heart would only take away your rightful happiness. I had to go Ella. I couldn’t risk hurting you like that. My final request is that you come see me tomorrow. If you can’t, I understand. It is probably too much to ask, but ask I will. Please. Yours, Harry.”



The tears came slowly at first. There was one lone one, trickling it’s way down her cheek. Then another, and another. They came faster and faster until her whole cheek was wet and she felt as thought all the water in her body was gone. When the tears finally stopped, she wrapped herself in a blanket, and fell fast asleep.



“Have a seat,” he said, indicating one of two rickety chairs. She collapsed into one, grateful to not be moving any longer. The short walk had tired her greatly. Harry was rummaging through something in a sack by his bed. He walked to the chair opposite to Ella and sat down, holding two sandwiches.



“Eat one,” he ordered.



“No, thank you.”



“It’s homemade,” he offered.



She closed her eyes and tore off a tiny piece of the bread. It smelled of home, and she knew that her mum had made them.



“How did you find me?” Ella asked. He smiled.



“That was more of a fluke. I actually was on business in a place near here. I asked around for you, more out of habit than anything, when someone said they might have seen you. So I came to this village and there you were,” he said, looking out the window. She put another piece of the sandwich in her mouth.



“What happened to you Ella? You look...sick.” he said, the concern detectable in every one of his features.



“I haven’t been eating much,” she confessed.



“More like not at all…” he said.



They talked for hours on end, not always about Ella. There were happy moments and sad moments, some laughing and some crying. When both of them were clearly exhausted, Harry looked her in the eye once more. His face was drawn and tired, but still contained his charm. His blonde hair had grown out and flopped over his forehead, desperately in need for a haircut. But it was his eye’s that she had missed the most. His wonderful, blue eyes. They were so full of life, emotion, she just couldn’t look away. Her dreams of him had never done them justice.



“Ella? Will you come back home? To your Mum and Dad...to me?”



“I don’t know, Harry, I...”



“I’ll make you better, Ella, we can do it together! However long it takes, I will be there with you every step of the way. I know that you may never trust me again. What I did was unforgivable. But...can you find it in your heart to give me a chance?”



Ella smiled. It was time for a change.



“Yes. Yes, I will come back with you, Harry, because I am in love with you, and I could never, ever keep away for so long.” She reached out and grabbed his warm hand. They sat together in the darkening room, staring at each other for the longest time.



It was only then that Ella realized how content she was. For the first time in a long while, she was beautiful. Now, she felt a new emotion, one that warmed her heart and brought a smile to her lips. Hope. Hope for a beautiful future. Because for the first time in six years, she was sure she could have one.