FLOWERS

FLOWERS



                           





So where should you start with me? How about flowers. Allow me to speak about flowers just briefly. When I was a little girl, I was always fascinated about beautiful flowers. For some strange reason I would find myself wondering off following a flower trail. My shyness is just like many flowers I’ve studied over the years. Flowers have a language of their own. My shyness is the same. Not too many people are really concerned of the true nature of flowers. They see and it’s beautiful. The time and essence that goes into the growth of a flower goes unnoticed. The flower serves it purpose and then it dies. Every sentiment on a flower is expressed in one form or another by fragile blooms. I can remember sitting and staring at flowers, watching how they grow. Never did I see when they would bloom, but after the fact would send me so far away from here. The shy side of me is taking in privately because it’s so very fragile that if someone knew how I would bloom they would not be able to take care of it like I do. I was wrong. I realize that there are people who know how to love and care for flowers of all kinds. I know there are people that can care for me just the same. I just haven’t thought about that anymore. I guess I became so immune into leaving the shy side of my life sacred. That’s a side that no man has never touched on. I feel my virginity is pure there.



I am a flower of many kinds. Flowers have different meanings. I say “VERSATILE” because it relates to flowers just the same. I

am a flower, different meanings to different people.  While flowers convey thoughtfulness and love, I would do the same. When a flower dies it make room for more to bloom. I can remember going to the stores with my mother, grandmother, and auntie; I would go straight to the florist section of the store. I would never go to the toy section, but straight outside where the flowers were. I would pull the sticks out the plants and take them with me. I would read about them. It was like I knew them and they knew me. ACAIA, is a flower meaning, concealed love, beauty in retirement, chaste love. ANEMONE, forsaken, AZELEA, meaning, take care of yourself,temperance, fragile passion, Chinese symbol of “Womanhood”.  Each flower represents a part of who I am. BEGONIA, is like a protector for me, “BEWARE”. BITTERSWEET, truth.



I love a CACTUS, they hurt if you don’t know how to handle them, but they have “Endurance”. Camelia, pink, longing for you. Camelia red, more like that flame in my heart. Camelia white, you are adorable. Carnation, pink, I will never forget you. Carnation white is my favorite, it speaks to me about sweetness and loveliness, innocence,  and pure love. The things I never thought existed did after the trauma happened in my childhood life. I could reflect back to sexual abuse, carnation yellow, on the other hand meant the disappointment in myself, the rejection from myself, and others. The shyness that no one knew about. Well, Tweetie, my best friend. R.I.P. was the only one that knew that side of me. She was quite impressed that I actually had a shy part. All she saw was the TOUGH GIRL, but loving.



Cattail, is the peace and prosperity in me. DAISY, well for the most part, I love daisies, my innocence, loyal love, “I’ll never tell”, purity, secrets. The other side of that was shame, dishonesty, betrayal, killing the silence, dirty, unclean, violated, Shhh!. My cousin(predator) knew I love flowers. He tried to take that away, but I did not allow that to happen. Flowers have life just like we do. People will take something so beautiful and crush it, destroy it, because they are not having a good day. Flowers are so fragile. It makes me uneasy to see how people handle flowers. It’s disturbing. When I see women with flowers, I watch how they admire them. , IT’S A MUST that I see the flower section when I’m shopping. It’s routine for me to make sure I see flowers of some kind before I leave. No one knows what is going through my head when I walk pass flowers. I become shy, I smile to see how beautiful they are.  TULIP, variegated, beautiful eyes. TULIP yellow, sunshine when I smile. 



Thank you, “flowers”