The Noponies pt V: Get Back

                                                                                                                                                                                  Get Back

While Celestia may not have had the ability to do anything to punish Hanz and Pinkie, the citizens of Ponyville were starting to catch on to what the two had been doing all these months.
How couldn’t they have noticed? The number of ponies who had been "disappearing" had only kept climbing day by day, and the fact that the guards would not even bother to investigate had the mayor and the citizens outraged.

But nopony was willing to stand up to Hanz and Pinkie.... not yet, at least. They continued to go about their routine of trapping and killing helpless ponies, unicorns, and Pegusi at will until they accidentally let one live.

A poor, brown pegasus had managed to fake his death while being toyed with by Hanz and Pinkie. "Aww, it looks like we may have killed him prematurely this time, love." Pinkie said with a frown, wishing the pegasus was still alive so they could have more fun. "Y...yes, it would seem so. I’m so sorry hun, I must have gotten carried away, and you know how I am when it comes to pegusi.” Hanz said, disappointed as well. They then retired to their bedroom like they always did after a torture session, for some "After party fun" as Pinkie called it. It’s shocking that Hanz hadn’t been killed yet, since she can be quite brutal sometimes on him.

As Hanz and Pinkie lay in bed asleep, the pegasus crawled.... slowly and silently, out of the chamber and up the stairs, being as careful as possible to not wake the pair.
When he finally made it out of Sugarcube Corners basement, he ran as fast as he could despite having both wings cut off and his left front leg broken, making his way to the emergency room, where he burst in through the doors and collapsed, scaring the nurse on duty. "Oh my! What in Celestias name happened to you?!" she screamed in shock, quickly taking him into a room and laying him on the hospital bed, doing her best to heal him.

Nearly a month passed before the brown pegasus....well....I’m not sure if he could be called one anymore, as the wings were too dead to be re-attached, finally woke up from a shock-induced coma. 

"W...where am I?" he asked, looking around and seeing everything as white, his eyes still adjusting “You’re in the Ponyville hospital, Mr. Clint Cloudkicker. You were nearly dead when you came in a month ago.....what in Celestias name happened to you?"

"I...." He then remembered it all. Every minute of his suffering came back to memory and he was filled with anger at the two evil ponies who had done this to him "I was nearly killed by those two Lunaspawn at the bakery! Somepony needs to do something to stop them!" The nurse looked at him and then looked away, she had heard her fair share of stories about the "Duo of darkness" who lived at and operated the bakery, so she called the Mayor and then Clint and her went up to the Mayors house.

"Hello you two, I’ve been expecting you." The Mayor said as she let them in. "So....you’re the only survivor of those two, Clint?" "Y...yes ma'am, we have to do something to stop them!"
She nodded, she was furious because some of her best employees had been killed by them, so her and Clint got to work immediately preparing to get the citizens of Ponyville together to take them down.

Hours later, the Mayor stepped up to her podium to give a speech
"Citizens of Ponyville, we have lived in fear for long enough! Today is the day that we finally get to rid this town of the evil that has been terrorizing it for nearly a year now! We finally have our first survivor, who can testify for us all, so that there will be no doubt that our deeds today are done in good conscience." Hanz' Eagle had been perched in the tree nearby, spying on the group on his behalf, and it then flew back to Sugarcube corner and told him the news. "P-pinkie! We have to pack quickly, forget work, we need to go!" The pair then rushed downstairs and frantically got their suitcases and began packing as the angry mod started marching down to kill them. "Ok, 2 bags are enough, make sure you have only the essentials!" Hanz shouted as him and Pinkie rushed upstairs to escape through the front door, but when they got there, the mob was already outside, demanding their deaths."Sh-Scheiße! They are already here!" Hanz shouted in fear "Oh no sweety.... I think this is the end....isn’t it? “Pinkie asked, the sound of nervousness and despair in her voice. "N-no, this is not the end...not yet! Back down to our special chamber, I have a plan!"

The pair rushed downstairs and Hanz grabbed a thick book along the way, then they locked themselves in their torture chamber. "Good, that iron door should buy us enough time.... let’s see....where is that teleportation spell..."
Hanz flipped through the pages of the book, a loud thud being heard as the front door was broken down by Big Macintosh, and he finally came to the spell on page 64
"Here we are! Quickly, there isn’t much time!" He then read the spell over and over and pulled Pinkie close as he concentrated, the mob coming downstairs and seeing nothing yet because they had shut the secret wall behind them, and just before they discovered the secret button, Hanz successfully cast the spell, teleporting him and his lover to his manor in Hoofenstein, safe from the mob finally and knowing they could never be hurt here.....though there would be hell to pay should they ever decide to return to Equestria.

Hanz then stepped out onto the balcony and whistled loudly, his eagle hearing the call and flying back to Hoofenstein to meet his owner again. "Good boy, Goebbels. You’re the best eagle in all of Hoofenstein!"

He then left his partner Pinkie at the house to unpack, stepping out of the house and walking down to town square, buying a map and looking at it to help him remember where his brother Adolf lived. After some help from the map, Hanz went west along Stompenhooven Street, and knocked on the big double doors at the end of the road.

"Who is there?" Said his brother as he opened the door, rubbing his eyes despite wearing his red shutter shades as always "Oh! You’ve returned home early, Hanz!  It’s nice to see you again." Hanz then gave his brother a hug and sighed "Yes, though it was because me and my partner were forced out of the town under penalty of death.  The citizens’ didn’t like our little hobby" His brother was angered by this news, and was wanting to punish the citizens of Ponyville for attacking his ambassador "Just give me the word, and I'll have my secret police dispatched to take care of them for you, Hanz!"
Hanz shook his head though.

"No Adolf, I just won’t be going back to Equestria again unless I just have to.... At least me and Pinkie got out of there with our lives." Adolf regretfully nodded, wishing he could have just sent his police to take them out "Well, we’ve got to get you and her cleaned up at least. I want to throw a ball tomorrow in celebration of our beloved Deputy Herr returning!" He patted Hanz on the back and he nodded "Ok then sir, I'll return home and get ready, expect me back here by 5pm" And with that, they saluted each other and Hanz went back home, helping Pinkie unpack

"Good news love, my brother is happy that I’ve returned home, so we have a ball to go to tomorrow night. You did say you liked parties, right?" Pinkie smiled and her eye twitched a little "Heehee, you know it, Hanzy!  I’m the biggest party animal in all of Equestria, just ask Rocky!" She exclaimed as she unpacked her friend "Rocky" from her case, a large pile of stones she stacked one on top of each other on a chair in the guest room "I brought all my friends along, and if you don’t mind, could they stay in the guest room?" She asked as she moved the rest of her "friends" into the guest room: A Bag of flour, a bucket of turnips Hanz had bought for her from Dimitri back in Ponyville, and a doll fashioned out of and in the image of a pegasus friend of hers who he never got to meet, but she told him about at one point "Sure thing love, Care to introduce me to them all?" Hanz asked politely, not wanting to insult her "Ohhh, This here is Madame de la flour, Sir Vladimir of Turnips, and My little Dashie!" She smiled and playfully hugged her doll "Ah, and don’t forget Gummy!" She said as she pointed to Gummy, who was just sitting in the corner with his big, bug-like eyes, and Hanz just nodded and smiled, giving her a kiss and helping her unpack "Well Pinkie, I think we have plenty of room here for all your friends, and feel free to make as many more as you like, don’t want you to be lonely while I’m out doing work!"