I tried to paint

I tried to paint a child’s love once. I tried to show the love on his chubby, cheerful face for the used spoiled mother, he was lucky. His sister wasn’t, I’ll have to tell him when he is older.
I tried to paint the green growing grass around him, well kept, but not managed, no time. Work woeful to do.
I tried to paint the rich ruby red of the smoking sun sipping from a long cool lake… But I couldn’t. it was perfect. To perfect for paint. I tried to remember… But couldn’t, the world stripped that of me long ago.
Fitted flesh hangs off frail hangers instead
And I cry.


I tried to paint the Pianists plaything notes once. I tried to show the beauty and craft into every juxtaposed joint, for his brother. He can’t move now, only months to live now. It’s no life, songs for him.
I tried to paint the black polished piano, should have been white. Angels sang from it, no one could. I can but it’s a sad sad secret. Father wanted Law.
I tried to paint the shame on his oldyoung face. Silent unseen shame written on his face. No humanly love from someone warming his shoulder. Just music.
Always music. Always… But I couldn’t. To much love to paint. I tried to paint this. But World dented me of this.
Computer music and worldly pleasures instead.
And I cry.


I tried to paint a crow curling through the mountain. Thousands of miles, moving up, barely kissing the sky. I tried to paint the wispy wingtips.
Barely touching her back.
I tried to paint snowcapped peaks, shouting down the clogged logged cabins.
I tried to paint an ice-blue stream, ready to break free when summer streams through the cold…
But I couldn’t. it’s not there. Black smoke deafens my ears, my eyes, my sight.

That crow? Dead. Why? Sport. World shot her down. No word from The dove, she called though.
Now flies in the blue blue sky with remembering family. No Earthfolk in sight. Love forever.

Amen