A Change of Heart

Mary Tyler picked up the newspaper and was drawn to an article about a man, Alexey Bykov who faked his own death in order to persuade his girlfriend to marry him: ‘I wanted her to realise how empty her life would be without me,’ explained Alexey.
She stared at the rivulets of rain coursing down the window pane, ‘like tears’ she thought.

To escape her melancholy, Mary decided to go shopping. Despite being deemed to ‘have it all’, the words how empty life would be echoed through her mind.
At dinner that night snatches of her husband’s voice broke through her mantra. ‘Did you pick up my dry-cleaning... And please make a dental appointment for me…” Twenty years of marriage. How empty life would be without me. If she disappeared off the face of the earth would Michael even notice?

The next morning Mary flipped open her computer and came across an advertisement for a hotel nestled in the mountains: Ideal for getting away from it all. Please note: No TV or Cell phone reception available. ‘Perfect!’ she thought and booked a fortnight’s stay.

Mary carelessly bundled some clothes and toiletries in a suitcase. She showered, dressed, and rushed off a quick note to Michael which she left on the antique stand in the hallway.
As she left the apartment building she wrapped her raincoat more snugly about her and hailed a taxi as the concierge helped with her luggage.
‘Thank you, Max.’ Doffing his cap and returning her smile, he felt an inexplicable sadness for her.
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Michael hung up his raincoat and discovered the note left by Mary. Pouring himself a Scotch, he sat down and read it.
‘I’m going away for a while. Dinner’s in the fridge. Your dentist appointment is at 9.00am on Monday. I’ll talk to you soon. Love, M.’
For the past few years the distance between them had become an ever widening chasm. Burying his head in his hands he thought ‘Perhaps this is the beginning of the end’. Michael went into his study, and took out the files he needed to go through. When had work become his solace? he wondered. ‘Tomorrow…..I’ll deal with Mary tomorrow’.
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Armed with her sleeping pills, Mary slept well, took long walks in the mountains soaking up the clean, fresh air.
This also calmed her galloping thoughts: At first a barrage of blame against Michael: for his neglect of her, and his obsession with work. But with each passing day this was overtaken by accusing voices of self-reproach: ‘Why should he love me…this empty shell that I’ve become.’ She remembered their earlier years and the lightness of being together. She remembered how bubbly and joyful she'd felt then…?

Some days later Mary took a different path and began to peel back the pages of her life seeking the answers. Drenched, and weighted down by each step she collapsed under a nearby tree, and then the floodgates opened.
She wept for her mother who’d died of Alzheimer’s: a slow, undignified dying… piece by piece. She wept for Rusty her retriever. She hadn’t secured the gate when she’d gone for a jog and he’d followed her. The sight of his mangled body in the road still haunted her. And then she wept for her unborn son, miscarried at 6 months… for her failure to have children thereafter. Emotionally spent, Mary made her way back to the hotel, showered and collapsed into a dreamless sleep.

The next morning she awoke, opened the curtains and was engulfed by the welcoming light of a new dawn.
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It was Saturday morning, the second weekend without Mary. Michael welcomed the lack of tension, but felt lonely. Looking at the photo on his desk: he and Mary in happier times on a skiing holiday, he wondered how it had gone so awry.
They should never have moved from the suburbs to the city. He’d hated the idea all along. He missed the garden. He missed having a dog around. But most of all he missed the Mary he had fallen in love with.

They’d met through the debating society at University. He’d admired her passion and clarity of thought. But it was her free spirit and joie de vivre that he’d really been drawn to. And soon, to the surprise of his friends, he’d dropped his bevy of beauties and he and Mary had become inseparable. She became his cheerleader, mentor, friend and lover.
Their failure to have children had been a disappointment to him. But for Mary it became an obsession. A roller-coaster ride of tests and treatments that over the years had driven a wedge between them…

And then he heard someone at the door.

‘Hello Michael…I’m so sorry…so sorry for everything… I’ve missed you so… Not just these last few days… I mean these past few years…I lost my way I’m back…..This is probably making no sense to you…but I’m really back… I’ve come to realise how empty my life is without you.’

Michael took her in his arms and raised his head to the heavens. ‘Thank you!’ to whatever force had brought her home.