Slowly

Slowly, oh so slowly a raindrop falls, hitting the ground,
Silently, but the noise around me is deafening, such a maddening sound.
In my baffled, yet broken, unhealing mind,
I search for something that I want but will never find.
My heart, merely an organ in my body, somehow ceases to beat,
I hang my head low, never having known such a feeling of defeat.
I dream, wishing for the blankness that nothingness would bring,
My luck never changes, I scream when you fall as the gun begins firing.
Blood on the ground, pools crimson red,
That one brief tragic moment in time left you dead.
Could you hear the mournful shrieking?

Hot, bitter tears that couldn’t stop leaking,
Disbelief that stole through my heart,
Anger, bitterness and revenge that tore me apart.
Where was God on the night you took your last breath?
Did he know that was the night my faith would die a slow and bitter death?
Did He Care?
Did He know?
Did he wonder how I’d feel?
Did he stop to think of my failure that was real?
Searching for you for so long,
Only to find you after you were gone…
The pain of that reality,
Oh how it haunts me…
Did you know that I cared?
How I wish I could have been there.
Two years have passed, and the tears still flow like rain,
I know you’re resting in peace, but I still feel the pain.
You left behind a legacy, touched so many lives,
It still hurts too much to visit and say goodbye.
Painful memories haunt me of the things I couldn’t do,
But I’m so blessed, despite the pain, that for one moment in time, I was able to know you.