Late Night Company

Late Night Company

It was after 9:00 and the taco place was almost empty.

He was eating alone as usual. It was two years after they separated, six months after the judge made it final and he had been assigned a permanent table for one. now he ate by himself and watched the theater of life play out around him. He like being where there were people, couples, families, one-eyed tattooed bikers with multiple nose rings and rainbow-hued hair, whatever. The presence of fellow human beings in any form eased the hollow ache of loneliness and gave him a sense of companionship, of belonging by proxy.

The only company this night was a quiet couple at a nearby table. The blonde young man sat chewing contentedly as his blond companion lovingly—and carefully—shared her cheese-covered nachos with him. Carefully because little boys don’t always chew their food completely before swallowing, and crunchy food with points was especially hazardous. Every few mouthfuls she would nibble at her taco, more out of habit than hunger, which he could tell was surely absent tonight.

But that was okay, because she was in no hurry to finish. She gazed out the window with unfocused eyes, looking without seeing, playing out some distant drama in her mind, or perhaps reliving a play in which she was both star and audience. He recognized that look of distraction and silently congratulated her for being a mom while her mind was clearly elsewhere.

He actually didn’t pay them much attention since they had little entertainment value, plus he was semi-immersed in a favorite paperback as he ate. He had re-read it dozens of times over the years and still it usually made him chuckle. Chuckles were good, chuckles were cheap painkillers that kept him from falling into the mental abyss. He had been intermittently close to the edge more than a few times—after the separation, during the difficult negotiations for a final settlement, and when he found out about her intentional overdose. Unlike the previous attempt, this one had succeeded.