How to be Happy: Lessons from Philosophy

Can philosophy teach us about happiness? In this series, I will be introducing a handful of interesting philosophers and their succeeding schools of thought. Each figure has something to say about the role and achievement of happiness in human life.

Happiness is a goal we all cherish, but many of us struggle to define it, even to ourselves. This is where the ancient Greek concept of eudaimonia comes into its own. For Aristotle, eudaimonia is better understood as flourishing, or a fulfillment of a person’s potential, a cultivated wholesomeness that arises when an individual lives fully according to their nature.

Epicurus, a philosopher born in Samos near Turkey in 341 BC, believed he had uncovered the formula human beings require to do this. Although none of Epicurus’ writings survive, we know about his teachings through the creed he passed down to his fellow countrymen.

Unlike many thinkers of his time, Epicurus valued pleasure as an important component for happiness. There is nothing wrong in seeking enjoyment he believed, the problem is that we tend to search for it in the wrong places.

Happiness comes from having what we need, not what we want. Unfortunately, the pressures of society cause a confusion between our needs and desires; advertisements, Epicurus said, knit our true human needs with a product or service in such a way our desires misfire to what we’re being sold instead of making us think deeply about what it is behind the image, the thing we truly need, and should thus desire.

So, what do we need, and how has advertising—evidently an age-old phenomenon if Epicurus is to be believed—taken advantage of this?

The Three Pillars of Happiness

Epicurus lived what he preached, and handed down a simple formula that anyone could to strive towards in finding contentment, a formula that is as relevant today as it was over 2,000 years ago.

1) Friendship

Aristotle famously said that man is a political animal. We value strong familial and social connections, finding comfort, support, and laughter in those around us. In modern times, science has proven the beneficial affect that friendship, physical bonding and social stimulation have on the health and mental development of both children and adults.

For Epicurus, friendship was a main pillar of life. We may not be able to choose our families, but we can choose our friends to suit our temperaments. Epicurus felt so strongly about the role of friends in his happiness that at age 35, he bought a house outside of Athens and moved his friends in with him. It is more important to pay attention to who you eat with than what you’re eating, and we should never eat alone, he said. Friends are a key component in maintaining our mental and social health.

For modern day folk, this may mean moving in with those we get on well with, or at the very least socialising with likeminded individuals as much as possible. Perhaps this is the reason why many look back on their university days as the best time of their lives; room-mates and constant socialising fulfilling the first pillar of happiness.

2) Freedom

Epicurus was not talking about the modern notions of total liberation or social anarchy, but he probably would have approved of our notions of equality. By freedom, he meant economic self-sufficiency. He literally lived the rat-race dream of moving to the countryside and living off the land; moving away from Athens with his friends and producing enough of what they needed so that money was no longer a concern. Epicurus and his friends did not answer to any boss, or have to worry about work; they became relatively self-sufficient.

You may wonder how practical this is for the majority of people. However, this is what Epicurus urged his followers to do. Short of setting up in the middle of nowhere, or emigrating to sunnier climes, individuals must consider what they can do to achieve a greater degree of freedom. This could mean self-employment, growing herbs and vegetables in the garden, using solar panels, or moving away from the city in order to make this feasible.

3) An Analysed Life

Self-reflection on the roots of our anxieties, understanding why we think and feel the way we do, why we act in certain ways or indulge in self-destructive behaviours—this is the final pillar to happiness, and one that absolutely any competent person can do. Epicurus taught us to be our own therapist, listen to our inner philosopher. This will provide us with the tools we need to help us navigate through the trying times of our lives, and is very similar to the teachings of modern day proponents of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy.

The Problem of Media

A simple formula, and yet many of us suffer from low moods and depression. Why is this?

Unfortunately, Epicurus says, adverts have misled us conflating these three pillars with their own products. I think we can all see clear evidence of this when we watch TV or look in a catalogue. Companies selling beer provide a sunny backdrop, crowded with friends having a good time. In this case, we may confuse buying the beer with gaining friendship, thinking we really want the beer but not realising it is the sense of friendship we truly require.

Other examples include cars or trainers associated with freedom, and perfume with beautiful sexual partners, as if a nice smell could compensate for a dull personality. Often these products have no real connection with the background message of the advert, or have names suggesting our desires. For examples, perfumes named “Freedom”, “Desire” etc.

What’s Missing?

Natural urges such as sexual relationships, and having children, play some role in the lives of most adults, yet Epicurus passes them over when discussing the pillars. Perhaps this was such a default element in Epicurus’ day that he did not need to focus on it. There is a certain message of self-reliance; if you are deprived of family, love, or children, you can still follow these pillars and improve your levels of inner contentment.

Later philosophers share advice on other areas that can cause unhappiness; adverts also make us feel uncomfortable in our own bodies, and society can often make us feel shame about our animal nature. This will be the focus of the next article, discussing the frank philosophy of Montaigne.