Pastel Guns

Chapter 1

Money is a terrible dictator. People will do everything for money only to later rid of it. Money has more power than the people who own it since without the money, they wouldn’t have power. Money even kills people. Money is murder

A story of greed by both felons is behind this tale of action and love. Hell is only a hard place to live in if you can’t think like the Devil himself.

We set our scene in London, England. A quiet place, and at times like this, riotous. May 22nd, 2013, a British soldier was assaulted, in polite terms, by a few men with a machete and a meat cleaver. At the scene was a hitman with a scowl on his face. Most civilians were in shock, horrified, and disgusted, but not Ritz. He was angry.
Clenching his fists, he casually walked to the pastry shop. Swinging the door open, tiny walked out of the kitchen with a bit of powder on her shirt.
“Hey there, Ritz!” She smiled, but that lovely grin soon faded when she saw his expression. “What’s wrong?”
“Turn on the news, please.” Always the polite fellow, even in the worst of times.

As told, Tiny turned on the TV that fit neatly on the wall over her counter. She walked out from behind the counter and flipped over to the news. The blood in her veins turned cold at the sight of it.
“I-I see what you mean, but why are you angry and not sad?”
“Because I’m frustrated and puzzled by human nature.” He slumped over to his usual stool and took a seat. “I’m just a little...confused. May I have an éclair?” Ritz asked, changing the subject. She nodded and turned off the TV.
“Yeah... Coming right up.” Her voice seemed to trail off.
“And can I have it to go?”
“Sure.”
“It’s not that I don’t enjoy your company, I just wanna go see my mum. She had a heart attack last night. Hopefully my visit will calm her nerves.”
“I hardly doubt an éclair will calm her nerves if she just had a heart attack.”
“Oh, no. The éclair so to calm my nerves.” Ritz sighed as she put the pastry in a box, then in a bag.
“No charge.” tiny said with a sympathetic smile, handing him the bag.
“Thank you, Lil’ Miss Tiny.” He smiled back, taking the bag. “I owe you!” Ritz said, leaving
“You don’t owe me anything! Just tell your mother I hope she gets better.” Ritz nodded and continued on his way through the streets of London.

Loud chatter that sounded like an abundance of gibberish filled the polluted air. Smoke from a plethora of things joined in. Ritz soon left it all by walking into the cleanliness of the hospital. The radical change was one that was welcome.
He walked up to his mother’s room, opening the door with a smile. Not much to his surprise, his younger brother, Keg, was there as well.
“Swiggity swag, what’s in the bag? -!” Keg asked, ironically, as he took the bag holding the éclair. “Sum sort of dessert!” He pulled out a note that was neatly placed on top of the pink box. “A note? This from your lemon?” With a smug look on his face, the younger brother opened the note, reading it aloud. “Call me sometime!” He chuckled as he looked to the number below, then the signature. “Tiny?”
“I remember you telling me about her, Fritz. She sounds like a darling! I never knew you two were together!” Their mother said.
“We’re not, mum.” Ritz chuckled in reply.
“Yet.”
“Mum, she’s very young and independent. Besides, she’s too good for me.”
“Nobody is too good for my boy! You go after her!” She pinched Ritz’s cheek.
“What if I’m not interested in her, mum?”
“Then, I’m sorry for misinterpreting that stupid grin on your face.” After that, the grin faded. Keg laughed loudly, beginning to eat the éclair.
“She’s mother's pearly gate at bakin'!” Keg looked in the box. “Pastel? ‘Ey! I’ve been there before! Is this Tiny character Liana?” Ritz nodded, causing Keg to smirk again. “Robin Hood choice!” Ritz shook his head and Keg’s comment.
“You two aren’t really helping anything.” He sighed as his phone began to ring. “‘Xcuse me, Mum.” He walked out of the hospital room and took the call. His eyes traced down the never ending crystal clear hospital hallways and then to the phone where the ID was unrecognizable. “Hello?” The response to his greeting made his eyes widen. Most would do the same after they hear a disguised voice tell them that their con-artist friend and his family are being held ransom for the money their friend had conned them out of.
He moped back into the hospital room and told them something came up and he had to leave. Taking Tiny’s number in hand, he walked out of the door and called her. There was no answer. Ritz then took the incentive to run to Pastel and get her. He would need help in this expedition.

Chapter 2

Approaching the tiny pastry shop, he saw the sign said closed. He couldn’t open the locked doors, so he broke the glass and crawled in. Her mechanical arm army quickly came out from the ceiling, but then recognized the intruder as Ritz. Confused, they stayed in place. Ritz, not wanting to really trigger them with movement, he called out her name. No response. He then shoved them out of the way and mumbled a few curses.
“Where the hell could she be?” He kept his hand on his cell in case he would have to call 911, but when he made it to the kitchen, he found her asleep on the floor. “Dammit...” He mumbled. “What do I do? She’s too tired to help, obviously. I can’t trust Keg in this situation. He doesn’t create bodies, he erases them!” He groaned, but his slight soliloquy caused the woman to wake up.
“Hmm? Ritz, what are you doing...?” She yawned, stretched, and then stood up. “How did you get in?”
“I broke the door.”
“They didn’t shoot you?” Ritz shook his head.
“No. Not sure why, but they didn’t. Anyways, I need your help.”
“I’d hope so. I’d be a little pissed if you broke my door and woke me up to say ‘Hello.’”
“I can imagine.” He rolled his eyes, trying to speed up the conversation.
“Right, so what’s up?”
“It’s Tick,” Ritz started. Continuing, he told her about the kidnapping, the reason, and the disguised culprit. “Now, we’re supposed to bring about £100,000 to this Warehouse a little far from here. Apparently, Tick recently hacked this person’s bank account. He was never good at hacking though. He must of had some help.” He looked to a distraught faced Tiny. “Oh, no. Don’t tell me.” She nodded
“S-Sorry. I didn’t think she’d go this far for money.”
“She’s a human being, Lil’ Miss Tiny. They do anything for money.”
“But, she was different.”
“How would ya know? Did you take a long walk on the beach with the woman and make love in the sand?”
“Well, yes, but that’s not the point. The point is-” She was interrupted by Ritz.
“Wait a second. You know her?”
“She’s my ex, but that’s in the past. We had culinary differences, so I decided to part ways.”
“What do ya mean by ‘culinary differences?’”
“Hopefully you’ll find out before it’s too late. But, that aside, we need to go save them! Come on!” She took Ritz hand and rushed out of her pastry shop. “And, why didn’t you just call me?”
“I did! You didn’t answer!”
“You should have called before I fell asleep!” They continued running until they reached her motorcycle. “And, here!” She put a helmet on his head.
“I don’t know your damn sleeping schedule!” He buckled it.
“Well, I fell asleep on accident. I was sitting on the cold floor, waiting for your call.” She got on the bike and he followed.
“You were...” He paused for a moment. “...waiting?” She nodded, starting the bike up.
“Yeah! I was hoping you’d call today! I wanted to do something with you tonight. This isn’t what I had in mind, but that’s fine.” Leaving the pastry shop, there was dead silence except for the sound of the bike’s motor.

Not too much later, they arrived at a large and dull looking warehouse. Parking the bike, they threw their helmets to the side and went into it. Tiny groaned and stepped inside of the warehouse, unknowingly, clinging to Ritz's arm in fear. He knew though.
As soon as a foot landed, a cling and a crack was heard. The inspected closer and the whole main room’s floor was a blanket of broken glass.
“W-Well, this wasn’t planned.” She said staring down to her pumps. “Did she know I was coming? She knows I have this fear of getting glass in my skin.”
“Not as far as I know, but it’s quite possible.” Ritz smiled at her. “We gotta do this for Tick and his family though.” Tiny nodded.
“This honestly wasn’t what I had planned to do today.” Ritz nodded in agreement as they began to trek across the glass field. As expected, little yelps in fear came from Tiny as she almost tripped here and there. Walking through broken glass in pumps wasn’t the easiest task.
“You okay?” Ritz asked with concern in his voice. He made it to the next door and held his hand out for her. After taking her hand, he opened the door and leaped inside with a breath of relief.

The door slammed behind the two and loud carnival like music began to play. The music was joined by furious coughing of the couple. They passed out on the floor and woke up almost world’s apart. The music was different as either awoke. Darkness had left both of them, but they were missing each other.
Tiny opened her eyes to lonely smoke flooding a room filled with strobe lights. Luckily, she didn’t have epilepsy. She was fine, but scared and lost. Her eyes curiously scurried around the room, but didn’t help much because of the smoke. Step by step, she moved through the crowd, hoping to find her other half. Without Ritz, she realized something that really hadn’t struck her before. She was very worried for him. The thought of losing him was almost unbearable. Especially in a situation like this.
“Ritz!” She called out his name. The lights started to move around more rapidly and the music abruptly stopped, starting a new tune. “R-Ritz! Where are you? -!” She called out again. She was frightened. A wayward rhyme started, more voices being added by each line.
“Many years I’ve spent here
Locked up in the dark
I’m afraid of the lights
And she has left her
Marking years I’ve been here
Too long for me it seems
If I’m here much longer
I think I might just
Screaming is an outrage
It makes my ears just bleed
I can’t hear what I’m saying
For I’m talking with such
Speedy little rats
They run upon the floor
Your dear friend is still shaking
He’s right there by the
Door is halfway open
And you can see the light
Go and get your boyfriend
And meet your final
P L I G H T
Plight
Plight
Plight”
Taking the word of the ominous voice, Tiny ran towards the sliver of light, seeing Ritz’s spasmodic shadow on the ground. The strobe lights got to him. Tiny quickly opened the door fully so he wouldn’t bash any of his limbs against it. She checked to see he was breathing. Thank God he was. Knowing she had to cushion his head, she did everything she could, but ended up sitting and placing his head on her lap. The strobe lights all exploded. After a minute, he stopped and Tiny could breathe again. Ritz closed his eyes for a moment and opened them up, looking up to her. A smile was what he gave to her as a gift of thanks. And, that was all she wanted.


Chapter 3

Rather stereotypically, our culprit turned around in a large chair. Her ebony face twitched into a twisted grin. Ivory gloves formed and arch under her chin as she leaned forward,
"Liana, I should have guessed you were in this. I'm glad they brought you along. I have missed you." She stood up and walked over to Tiny. Her gloved hand touched the other's cheek. "You look nice." She curled her hand away and looked to Ritz. "Do you have the money?" Ritz raised an eyebrow.
"You never said anything about money." He said through his clenched teeth. In actuality, he had forgotten the money. He knew she said something about it, but he forgot to bring it. Where would he get that kind of money anyways?
"Oh? My apologies. Can fetch me about £100,000?"
"Fuck no!"
"I'm afraid you don't have a choice." She looked over to Tiny. "You always liked garlic, but do you think the kids do? It'll be the last thing they smell, after all."
"That's just sick." Ritz gagged. "Just give 'em back! We'll get you your bloody money back. Don't you dare harm my friend and his family!"
"Is this the kind you have reverted to, Liana? How sad. You could have had much better."
"Don't talk about him like that, Jenny! At least he isn't a cannibal!" Tiny retorted, stepping forward, trying to intimidate her.
"So, did you like those strobe lights?" Jenny asked Ritz, changing the subject.
"You cheeky bitch." He snarled, taking out his gun. "Where are they?" Tiny tried to move his hand from his aim at Jenny's head, but he bruised her pale skin, pushing her aside. To the ground she fell.
"Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Liana, dear, your taste has gotten evil." She chuckled. "Do you wanna rumble?" She took out a key and walked over to the door behind her, unlocking it, and let the family out. "I do like living, but I'm going to follow you home and you better fucking have that money." Ritz nodded in agreement.

Ritz held out his hand to Tiny with a small, disappointed frown. She put her delicate hand inside of his own as he pulled her to her feet.
"I'm sorry, Lil' Miss Tiny. Are you okay?"
"It's fine." She sighed. "I'm fine." She smiled softly and Ritz returned the gift. Just then, Claude, Tick's husband, spoke up.
"Ritz, may I look at your gun?" Ritz nodded
"'Course. But why?" He handed the gun to Claude and Claude aimed the gun at Jenny's head. Brain splatter sounded like an exploded smoothie. Tick covered the kids' eyes and escorted them out. A frozen Ritz took back his gun. "What the hell did you do that for?"
"She was gonna eat my family. Ain't no bitch gonna attempt to do that and live!" Claude smiled, content with himself as he followed his family. Tiny and Ritz followed behind, wondering what the hell just took place.


Chapter 4

They made it through normally. The strobe lights were still broken, so Claude used the cell phone light from Jenny's phone to lead the way. He opened the door and almost stepped out, but Tick stopped him, seeing the glass shards. Each of them picked up a child and carried them out. Tiny was about to step out, following them, but she was swept off of her feet. Ritz smiled as she chuckled softly. He walked out onto the glass.
"You don't have to do this, Ritz." Tiny chuckled out, still surprised.
"I want to, Lil' Miss Tiny." Ritz kept on smiling, content with carrying her. Well, not so much carrying her as holding her close. She was contents well as he continued. Their eyes were stuck on the other's.

They made it out of the warehouse. Claude hijacked a car as Tiny and Ritz rode off on her motorcycle back to Pastel. Tick and his family went home, leaving the two alone at the pastry shop.
"That was quite an...event." Tiny sighed, walking inside.
" I'll say. Are all of your exes like that?"
"She's the only one. I kind of had trust issues after that for awhile." She plopped down onto the couch and looked out of the window, into the night. "It's late. Like past midnight, late." Ritz sat down next to her.
"I'll escort you home, if it makes you feel safe."
"I can take care of myself, but I still want you to come with me. Only because I enjoy your company though." She yawned and hugged him. "I could just sleep here if I wanted to. It's quite comfortable."
"Do ya want me to leave?" Ritz asked, hugging her back. She shook her head.
"I'd like for you to stay." She smiled up at him with her light pink lips.
"I'll stay then." His eyes met hers and before he could smile, she used her lips to barricade any smiles from him. It was a short and sweet kiss that was followed by a smile from the both of them. Once again, he returned the gift with his lips. Only this time, they were touching hers.