MY EMOTIONAL BANK]

LEFT BY THE ROADSIDE

On a journey of self
You embrace me with want
Gifting me with the joy of your smile
I laid my guards down...
How couldn't i?
When in all you seem so sweet
Weaving plans of merrymaking and happiness
On a roller coaster of unceasing joy
I held your hand
In your eyes i experienced oneness
Kinship,which was all but fake
Love which couldn't stand the test of time
Would i say me foolish?
Too trusting or perhaps unfortunate
Or perhaps
Too eager to love

You couldn't share your troubles with me
For better or worse they say
But that wasn't our story
I wanted your pain
As well as your joy
Left in the closet,,,
I felt bitterly abandoned
Wrote letters that ended in the waste bin
Got the answering machine,oh damn that dratted machine
Like a cattle man on a cold foggy day
Like an Eskimo on the way to his igloo, on a cold arctic blast
My heart was cold, my body frozen
Wanted you so much, i ached
But you left me all the same
Not a magician neither God
But was gonna drop
Like a widow's mite, my own effort
To ease your pain, though i couldn't wipe it away
Trips to the chapel with my battered self i made
Hoping against all odds for what could only be called a miracle
A way to mend my trashed heart
Talks about ideal, thought you were mine
Oblivious to the fact that i
In my distorted mind was building
Beautiful but unreal sandcastles in the air
Must i pay for my negligence all my life
On that night when i erred
Purely cause of circumstance that plague my everyday existence
]this is neither a poem nor a letter
But words from my heart, so long frozen
Though things may never right itself
A plea
Has made my heart weary
Maybe a flutter of hope or a miracle
Could begin to thaw my body and soul erasing the pain of being abandoned by the roadside
And make my ever flowing tears seize
And my fear a thing of the past }

Save me..................................



Left By The Doorstep


PuSH, Shove.....
It doesnt work
You call me love,
But you treat me lika stranger,
You say i am your light
But you dont want me to share....
For better or worse
Love is meant to be reciprocrated right?

Your pain my misery
Your tears my sadness
Your happiness my joy
Am not just an ornament
To be hung high on christmas day
But someone who wants to be one with you

I felt like heaven by your side,
Holding your hand to cross a puddle of water
Smiling up at you like a lovesick fool
Inhaling that wonderful scent of you
Only for you to push me away
Far away
Tears i Have shed
Pain enveloping my heart
sleepless night and restless day
You still invade my dreams
You still own my heart