Dreams of Reality

She was lovely.

My sister’s lovely hazel eyes, dangling black hair and cherry cheeks were once vivid as ever, youthful, unchanging. We loved each other, as much as sibling love went, and she would always smile, tease me and pull my hair. Her unending youth was famed, and countless compliments came her way. It seemed she was flawless; she would often smile and laugh at those compliments everyone admired her and lavished her with sweet words. She acted like she didn't worry, like she had no cares in the world. But that, in the end was all an act, the world was her stage, so she soon became attached to those compliments, obsessed you could say, yet she was unfazed. The act would cost her dearly.

Deep down though, she was hurt, eventually she couldn't live without those them. And she got them, as she desired, she was merrier than ever. I should have stopped her, warned her of what was to come. Her youth wasn't going to last forever, and soon she would lose her youth and move on like others. It was pitiful see how she was growing on those compliments, but I couldn't stop her, she was so happy like that, I decided to just let it be. Yet the uneasiness grew.

Sure enough after a while everyone got tired of lavishing her, and they moved on with life. But they left her behind, all of a sudden she lost all reason, she thought she did something wrong. At first it only bothered her that no one was saying anything about her, but after some time it drove her mad. She was addicted, she loved those sweet compliments, and when she couldn't have them she demanded them. She asked me if I thought she was beautiful, and I said yes, but she still flew away in a fury. She wouldn't eat if I said anything otherwise.

In the end when it was only I who gave her compliments, she decided to change herself. She started taking doses of it at a time hoping it would make her more beautiful. In the end even that wasn't enough. It pained me to see that she was on the breaking point, on the verge of suicide; it was never enough for her.

She started taking those pills. She started taking huge amounts at a time, I begged her to stop, I pleaded, but she would not listen to the voice of rationality. The overdose hurt her, she was becoming a skeleton, each time I saw her, her eyes were dazed and she was getting closer to pure bone, I could see the death approaching closer. Every day she would

She was growing addicted; I began to worry about the overdose. She was taking more and more and eventually even that wouldn’t be enough for her. When at last she couldn't live without it, I knew something had to be done. I had to take the vile evil away from her life.  She screamed and sat down sobbing when I told her, it… hurt me deep down, but I knew it was for her own good. If only I had stopped her earlier! She pleaded with me, begged, her tears cascading from her skeletal figure. I had tears also, my pain was as worse as hers was, she ended up hating me already, but she could never despise me more than I loathed myself. I was beginning to crack. She refused to eat or sleep, I tried to reason with her, yet she refused. I could tell she wasn't going to relinquish, I…. gave her the pills, she smiled and hugged me. Tears poured down my face, she gulped on the drug and fell, time slowed as she fell slowly.  She looked up weakly, tears pouring down, smiling, and uttered one last final work to me. “Sorry”. 

…………….

I’m sorry.

She was never to wake said the doctors. Gone. She was at peace and that was enough for me. She was never going to wake from the coma. She would never come back; the older sister I loved was gone. Or was she?

I observed the pills, this was the cause of her demise, and this was the true face of evil. I hated them in way, yet I could not bear to throw them away, for this was one of the only things I had left of her, it was bittersweet. I wanted to see how she felt before she died, just to be with her once more.

I took her pills and ingested them, it was not a pleasant experience, I just wanted to connect with her, to see what she felt like at that time. All in hopes of connecting with her. No matter how fake it was, I just wanted to see her smile again. I took some more pills until I was on the verge of losing consciousness, my chest clenching in pain.

My vision began to blur and I saw a shadow. I looked up and saw her, she was at her pinnacle of beauty, her blood red lips and face were all too real. I saw her lovely face as it was before, before she was ruined. She smiled and hugged me, I hugged her back tears streaming down, and she had come back to me. Her beautiful smile was here, the ugly reality must have been a dream.  It must have always been a dream. It was always a dream, only a dream, it could not be more, it must not be more. It had to.

She hugged me.

“I will always love you” she said

“Always”