Struggling

Sadness bears down upon me
Like waves battling within the open sea
I’m struggling to stay above, fighting not to go under
‘Sink or swim’ it whispers
It tempts me with its soft voice
Lulls me into a false security
‘Come’ it murmurs
‘Just stop struggling’
‘You’ve had enough’
‘You’re just not that strong’
‘No one cares’ it taunts
I close my eyes
Oh I try not to listen
But truth is what it speaks
The words that it weaves
Open the hidden wounds I’ve tried to hide
I take a breath and try so very hard not to cry
There’s a crack in my defenses
It tries to get through
Once again it attempts to lure me in
Its voice tender as if it caresses my cheek
‘I love you’ it coos
‘I will never leave you’ it promises
My barricades crack even more
I so want to believe
Even though I know they are just empty words
Seeds of doubt spring forth
Pushing me closer to its side
Would it just be easier leaving?
It’s not like I’ll be missed
No one cares
‘So true’ it agrees
They always go
Leaving me cold and alone
‘Forever and ever’ it points out
What’s the point of struggling?
Does it really matter?
‘Not anymore.’ It voices understandingly
It has begun to seep through my crumbling defenses
I know this and so does it
‘Follow me under’ it wishes
‘Your pain will be over’ it purrs
This time it’s harder to resist
My arms cease in the struggle
Slowly I begin to descend
Inch by inch
Lower and lower I go
The end has finally come
One last breath before I’m undone