No ratings.
Short humorous scene set in a Court of Law |
A COURT OF LAW Judge Bring in the accused Enter the accused Judge You are accused of breaking into a florists and stealing £100. How do you plead? Defendant Like this (falls to his knees) Please let me go. Please please let me go Prosecution What is your name and where do you live? Judge I am the Right Honourable Justice Horlington of Islington Prosecution I was addressing the defendant Your Honour Defendant I am Horace Wimpole of 7 Gardeners Terrace Cricklewood Prosecution (shouts) SO YOU ADMIT IT Defendant What? Admit what? Prosecution That you are the same Horace Wimpole who broke into a florists and stole £100 Defendant I never admitted that Judge Yes you did I heard you Defendant I admitted I'm Horace Wimpole but I never robbed a florist Judge I see. Well carry on Prosecution Call the first witness (Witness takes the stand) You are Mrs Felicity Dogooder of 23 Darby Street? Witness Who's asking? Pros No need to be nervous Mrs Dogooder. We only want to ascertain what you saw on the night of the 22nd Witness When was that? Pros That was the night you saw this vile thieving devil break into the florists and steal £100 like the cowardly disgusting piece of vermin that he is..... Defence Counsel I object Your Honour Judge Objection sustained. It was the 23rd not the 22nd. Defence The Defence would like to call a surprise witness Your Honour Judge Well go on then ( A MAN LEAPS UP BY THE SIDE OF THE JUDGE) BOOOO Judge I wish you wouldn't do that Pros The prosecution would now like to call the victim Mr Bowles the florist Clerk of the court Will you take the oath please Mr Bowles In the beginning God created the Heavens and.... Clerk Mr Bowles you're supposed to take the Bible in your hand and read the card. Not the other way around Pros Mr Bowles do you recognise your assailant? Mr Bowles My what? Pros The man who robbed you Mr Bowles Where? Pros Do you recognise him in this Courtroom? Mr Bowles Aye that's him alright. Nasty sneaky looking fellow with his eyes too close together Pros Mr Bowles you're looking at the Judge Judge I've heard enough. There has been nothing in this trial to make a convincing case and so I direct the jury to deliver a not guilty verdict. The defendant is free to leave the courtroom. Defendant Excellent. Does that mean I can keep the money? |