Angst Poem

I wrote you a letter
in the hopes that some day maybe I’d feel better
In the hopes that I’m going to make it through
That someday soon maybe i could talk to you

I left today
because it was going to kill me to stay
I couldn't be anywhere but away
from you..and from your
disconnected aloofness

I wrote you a poem
I'm’ sorry but I just had to go home
If i make it to the other side
If i get through it i’ll provide
an answer,
as to why.

How do you care?
Are you only mad because i never talk?
Did it hurt at all when when you saw me walk
away from you
or am i just getting on your nerves?
or all over mine?

I wrote you a song
because I’m not sure which one of us is wrong.
Because it hurts just like a cancer that is
taking over my face
and who I am’s only way you make me feel.
or how you want me to

I wrote you a deal
but i never finished writing it for real
I just imagined we had worked it out
we figured out what I am all about
it was a nightmare
it was just a dream

I’ll gnaw my tongue to shreds,
I’ll pull all the hair out of my head
if you ever care to read this I’ll be dead
or at least inside
I’ll have you know I never cried
Never so much in my life
and not again,
i give up.