PEOPLE ON COPING

Why is it always so easy to give advice to others, give hope and encouragement to some but so difficult to apply it in our very own self? "It's easier said than done" according to an old adage. Yes it is, especially when a person giving advice is not in a foul situation that making someone feels better is as easy as reading a good verse from the bible. Had the situation been reversed would it be easy to take and apply that same advice on himself? Sometimes those who always inspire and encourage others are often the ones who do not follow their own advice. I think it's not the situation alone that makes it hard for somebody to do or act on something, but it's more of what a person thinks he is capable of in handling that situation he is in. Questions like, Will I survive this? Can I move on? How long can I stand this? are just a few of the many doubts a person has in mind in every unfavourable situations he has come across. Some people might be good in giving motivational speeches, writing encouraging books and become an expert in counselling, but some of them could not even attempt to apply their own advice in resolving their own personal life issues. They might be using the situation of others as a way of dealing or coping with his own problems by listening to their sentiments, and somehow try to give them something to keep their hopes up. What makes it hard for them to do for themselves, they do it to others by trying to make a difference in other people's lives. I mean, it is probably their own way of making themselves believe that somehow, eventually, they too can move forward and go back to their peaceful life again .

There might be some factors accountable to a person's behaviour when face with a problem towards a particular situation. It could be grief or loss and not be able to cope with it, or fear and not be able to face it, or it could be failure and not be able to deal with it and a few other things. Some would have a hard time adjusting because of what drives their life. One common thing is guilt, that they keep on blaming themselves thus making their life unhappy. Another thing could be resentment, that they cannot easily get over the hurts caused to them by others thus ended up holding it for a long time. More often than not those who have gone through a lot of difficult times are the ones who could help best during rough times, just take it from someone who knows, as some might say. It is common for anyone who always motivates and like helping others, to become selfless and learn how to set aside their own personal problems. They have this attitude that makes people trust them, rely on them, become inspired through them and believed in them that eventually things will fall back in to order again. There are people who even write and publish inspirational or self help books as a means of coping. Some might not find in themselves the morale their readers got in reading their works but they might feel relieve that at least they find a way to touch other people's lives. I know this doesn't happen to all people, but under the circumstances when what seems to be a strong person in the outside is sometimes quite the contrary in the inside and vice versa. The stand up comedians for instance. They might seem to be the happiest people we can think of, but in reality they are the ones who sometimes have the worst problems. Some might even look up to them so much for being so positive and carefree as if they have never gone through a bad situation before. Making people laugh at their jokes and humour is probably their own way to temporarily forget their problems.

Everyone has its own shares of ups and downs and at the same time finds its own way of celebrating the good times as well as dealing with the hard times. Sometimes life has a funny way of teaching us lessons through several life tests, and made it a little too easy and a little too hard by giving us countless choices. What matters in the end is that, we chose to be happy and continued to live despite everything. And as what Joshua J. Marine once wrote “Challenges are what make life interesting and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.” ♥♥♥