A descriptive piece I did last year. Not a true story (but I wish). |
Be civil, be steady my uneven breathes. Calmly I look towards the highway of traffic, scanning, searching for his familiar flash of silver. Why I cannot be more expressive, perhaps more "outgoing" in the eyes of all those around me...I could have lived in such a way that I would not have to simply shrink away. But then I wonder, as he arrives and walks towards us; his eyes first meeting mine in a look of pure understanding and bliss, if the event that unfolded would not have turned out so beautifully. He was quiet, but not shy or reserved. He was similar to myself: quiet because he was always thinking, always pondering situations in a far more meaningful manner than what simply met the eye. I could converse with this man on such a deepened level that there was no need for the exchange of words, only a few stolen glances and perhaps a slowed down beat in his step. As he approached further I realized how little I still knew about him. How could one have this much desire for something unknown; for there were days that I missed him with the passion of a burning sun. The day of the event became a miraculous day indeed, filled with fun and festivity. I came to love social gatherings far more than I had in my younger years; they were an excellent excuse to be with friends and not have another care in the world. I watched him across the fire, the blazing smoke framing his face miraculously. He kept his gaze fairly low, watching the burning embers for hidden secrets. He had a slight smile on his face, almost like he knew. The night progressed fairly quickly, and I became distracted with a friend of mine who had already busted out the harder stuff and his intoxication was becoming quite evident. We all laughed and poked fun, now it was down to just a few of us at the fire. I helped the poor sap get to his feet only to fall down again, pretty soon he was out cold. I sighed and attempted to drag him inside, the night was getting rather chilly. He helped me bring him inside and get him to bed, the look of admiration on his face at my caring gesture almost caused me to faint as well. After my friend was tucked in I offered him a ride home, to which he gladly accepted. On the ride we talked and talked. It was rare that we had the opportunity to use words with each other one on one. Finally all of the questions I had about him, all of the longing to get to know him better was becoming fulfilled. Apart of me wished that I had just left the offer alone, for now my desire for him was becoming more deepened. I calmed myself as we discussed politics and where we grew up, my voice sounded surprisingly collected with just the right amount of sass. He appreciated my genuine answers to a few of his questions regarding women. Perhaps things on the home-front were not good. As our conversation became more and more intense I simply could not help myself. I could not back out. We approached the bridge, a beautiful area that overlooked the river. The park by the side of the river was quite quaint and surrounded by trees, and I commented to him how beautiful it must be in the daytime. The park was his idea, a place where we could maybe talk some more before I dropped him off at home. We sat on the bench overlooking the water, neither of us spoke. The silence felt oddly comforting, I could tell he felt it too. We were so much alike, me and him, silence never seemed to bother us. I began to wonder if this was all he wanted; simply to sit and think. I smiled suddenly, for just being in his presence for this long period of time, one on one, was more than enough to satisfy me. I started to speak, to remind him that it was late and perhaps we should press on, when he turned his body ever so slightly and looked me in the eye. I stopped in my tracks, my chest moving in and out quite purposefully, my eyes wide as they looked at his. Such a simple gesture, I thought. Yet it seemed to mean so much. I stammered for a second with my words. It was the first time I was beginning to show my nervousness at being with him. I said his name, I shied away, I broke the stare. I swallowed hard and shifted uncomfortably. But then I looked at him again: his eyes so dangerously blue, his face perfectly framed by his thick strawberry blonde hair, his stubble accenting his jawline. He smiled gently, moving closer to me. His side brushed against mine on the bench as we sat, and at that point even the strongest forces of nature would not have been able to separate us. My rationality was overridden with burning passion as our lips touched, possibly the softest and most sweet lips I had ever felt. We lingered there for what felt like an eternity, yet when he slowly pulled away I wanted nothing more than to feel him again. Before he could speak I embraced him again, our kisses becoming more and more meaningful. He put a soft hand on my side, pulling me in closer to him. "You don't know how badly I have wanted this," he whispered gently in my ear. But I did know, his actions spoke much louder than he knew. Yet his words still sent shivers up my spine, hearing them out loud was incredible. I opened my mouth to speak, but just smiled and gazed at him instead. I had reservations, perhaps it was part of being a woman. I wrapped my arms around his body, resting my head on his shoulder. His body felt warm against mine; it felt so perfect and natural. He kissed my cheek and then my neck, encouraging me. I kissed him again, running my hands across his body. He carefully slipped his hands underneath my shirt, the cold air of the night touching my bare skin and causing me to shiver. He pulled me in as close as he could, apologizing for the coldness. I hushed him and kissed his lips. I could almost feel him melting underneath me as I moved into him, his breathes became short and deliberate. He felt my breasts, and I smiled with pleasure. The man swallowed hard, looking down at my chest with intensity and purpose. I kissed him more assertively, running my hand across the small of his back. It was incredible and hard to believe; I wondered if the whole thing was a mere figment. Our souls had finally become one; our bodies finally together after years of begging. It felt so natural yet so unique. I wondered how many people had a chance to experience something quite as wonder-filled as this night. But alas it soon ended, as I pulled away and he re-claimed his hands. We watched each other for many moments and smiled. Without needing to speak we got to our feet and proceeded to the car. I returned him to his dwelling where he wished me a good night and gave to me a smile sweeter than the waters of the earth. I watched him enter his house, a slight tinge of guilt hitting my chest. I thought about him as I drove home, as well as many nights after. |