Problem & Conflict

Problem & conflict are part of life and relationships; with friends, family and at work. Fortunately, problem solving and conflict negotiation skills are both attainable and improve over time. When we are unwilling to recognize and solve problems that arise in our lives = feelings of anger, resentment, and victimization are being cultivated; often times resulting in terminated partnerships, unresolved issues, and unnecessary "power plays" that waste our time and energy. Furthermore, not being willing to meet these problems head-on means we're likely to run into them again. With some people, there will be problems that can't be settled in a mutually satisfactory way. And with these people the issue is typically one of BOUNDARIES = where there is NO ROOM FOR NEGOTIATION. Therefore, out of personal responsibility to ourselves, it's crucial to know - and UNDERSTAND - what WE want; what WE need; and what our "bottom line" is. But for the most part, our problems can generally be worked out, worked through, or sufficiently negotiated. In order to effectively negotiate our problems, we have to be proficient at identifying them appropriately, letting go of blame, and focusing on a realistic solution. So, when applying this to our relationships, it's imperative to have a sense of our bottom line and know our boundary issues; so we don't waste time attempting to negotiate the NON-NEGOTIABLES. Essentially, we have to learn how to identify what BOTH people really want and need; figure out what options are conducive to BOTH persons wants and needs being met; become flexible without being TOO flexible; seek "balance" in that we're not being TOO submissive or demanding; basically, be open to conflict negotiation with other people. And when we are able to consistently put this skill to use in our daily lives and relationships = We are living at elevated levels of effectiveness and efficiency.

Sachable